(To Pinocchio, after he has destroyed Lorenzini's theatre)
Come here, you little... (Gets struck by fire) Ah!!
Pinocchio
Jonathan Taylor Thomas · 22 quotes
wikipedia:Mangiafuoco
11 quotes
Geppetto
Martin Landau · 10 quotes
Pepe, the Talking Cricket
David Doyle · 9 quotes
Lorenzini
Udo Kier · 5 quotes
Felinet
Bebe Neuwirth · 3 quotes
Volpe
Rob Schneider · 3 quotes
Most scenes together: Pinocchio & Geppetto (3), Pinocchio & Lorenzini (3), Volpe & Felinet (3)
The Adventures of Pinocchio quotes
Page 2 of 4(To Pinocchio, regarding Lorenzini)
That's not love, he's fooling you! He's got evil plans in the works, and he's using you to make them come true!
(To the boys at Terra Magica)
Come here! Over here! No, this is all wrong! You gotta believe me! Look, they're trying to trick you! They want us to behave badly. Don't go on the ride, please! We've been acting like jackasses, so that's what we turn into!
(Whilst chasing the puppet throughout the town)
Ooh, ooh - Come down right now! What are you doing?! Come down this instant young - man! Come down here! I'm not going to go chasing after you!
Have you found any luck?
Leona I asked Carmela if she'd seen Pinocchio.
And?
Leona She said no. But then I went to see Tino.
And?
Leona He said no. But then I went to Maria the witch, the one who hasn't spoken in years.
What did she say?
Leona Nothing. But, she gave me this.
A stick? What's it mean?
Leona Think about it. Pinocchio probably feels like he can't come home, and that he'd be in trouble if he does.
Yes, but...?
Leona Where would you go if you felt like that?
I don't know. Somewhere safe.
Leona And where would that be, given the fact you were made of wood?
The forest! Thank you, Maria!
Leona Well, what are you waiting for? Let's go!
Don't you just hate that kid?
Not as much as I hate you! (hisses at him)
No, no, we've finished with him now. We're just here to ask for forgiveness.
What's forgiveness?
Forgiveness is when you have done something really really wrong, and you know what you did was wrong, but you want someone else to tell you it was wrong, but you know what you did was wrong because you did it!
Monk
Sssh!
Please forgive me for being a puppet, and not a real boy.
How?
All you need is a miracle!
What's a miracle?
Miracles make your dreams come true.
All I'm doing is having a little fun.
Yeah, fun, good idea! Fun gets my antenna waaaay up! But what about your Papa, you said you bought him up?:
I didn't bring him up.
Precisely my point! You know what comes from actin' like a jackass? And if you act like one, you'll become one!
Hellooo....
Ooh, what a charming little item you are. (Holds out hand) May I? (Raps Pinocchio's head, makes a hollow thud) Ooh... empty as a witch's dowry. Ooh, look how smoothly his arms move. (Geppetto comes up)
Now Pinocchio, don't do that again. (To the thieves) Er, excuse me, but don't you two have a pushcart or something to rob?
Uh, we've already done that. (Felinet glares at him)
Come on Pinocchio. I don't want you doing that again.
Oh but Geppetto darling, we were just playing with him.
He'll play with his own sort, thank you.
Come on son. Don't ever do that again.
He's a puppet, fur-face. He's going to be worth a fortune...and I know exactly where to cash him in! (Both giggle)
Father
Don't worry, son! I'll get your ball back! (Felinet glances at Pinocchio's ball, realizes who it belongs to, and runs off, tossing the ball at Volpe) (Boy and his father round the corner, boy points at Volpe, who is foolishly holding the ball)
Father
Take my kid's ball, would you?? (Punches Volpe viciously)
The Professor
(Upon Pinocchio causing a disruption in class, the Professor turns round)
What is going on in my classroom?
Infantino
The new kid punched Lampwick, professor.
The Professor
(he walks slowly and menacingly up to Pinocchio)
Is that true?
No.
Boy
(his nose grows)
Hey, how'd you do that?
The Professor
Silence! (looks at Pinocchio) Now you're not lying to me by any slim chance, are you?
Uh... uh... no. (His nose grows longer)
The Professor
There are two kinds of lies. (he is now walking through the room) Lies that have a short legs, and lies that have a long nose. And yours are clearly the kind that have a long nose. Now, I will give you one last chance to redeem yourself: If you didn't punch Lampwick, how did he end up on the floor?
(struggling)
Uh... Nobody punched Lampwick... Lampwick punched... himself. (his nose is now extremely long) Uh, I mean, a man - climbed - in - through the window and punched him, and Lampwick tried to kick him back, but-- but he missed (his nose is now the length of the classroom) and fell on the floor and-- !
The Professor
(inevitably, the class laugh hysterically)
Silence! (fails to keep order) SILENCE! (Pinocchio turns his head around and the class on the other side duck their heads, he then turns the other way and Lampwick quickly distracts the prefect, so that he is hit in the head by the nose. Lampwick and Saleo then laugh.HIs nose hits the cleaning cloth filled with chalkdust and slowly rises to meet the professor's face)
The Professor
(he suddenly notices Pinocchio's nose right in front of his. Pinocchio is about to sneeze)
Infantino! Go... go on... (gestures at the prefect) A handkerchief... go on! Quickly!
(as the class urge Pinocchio to sneeze, the prefect runs up with a handkerchief and Pinocchio disastrously sneezes all over the Professor's face, sneezing sawdust on him)
(He decides to tell the truth)
I... I did punched Lampwick, Professore, and I'm sorry. (his nose shrinks)
The Professor
Well, it's too late for that now. If there is one thing I will not tolerate in my classroom, it's a liar. Out.
(he walks miserably up from his desk but can't because of his nose, so he decides to tell the truth)
Uh... uh... and... I am sorry that I kicked him too. (his nose shrinks)
The Professor
Out!
And, I'm even more sorry that I'd told a lie.
The Professor
"Out, out" I said!
The Professor
(he finally leaves the room)
Now class, we will review what we have learned today.
What news?
Leone
Well I went to the baker's but they said nothing, so I went to town but nobody said anything, so then I went to Maria, the witch, the one who hasn't spoken in years.
What did she say?
Leone
Nothing. But, she gave me this.
It's a twig.
Leone
Think about it. Pinocchio probably feels like he can't come home, that he's lost, and you'd be angry at him if he did.
Well, yes.
Leone
And so where would you go if you felt like that?
I don't know. Somewhere quiet, safe.
Leone
And where would that be, given the fact you were made of wood!?!
The forest! Thank you Maria!
Leone
Well, what are you waiting for, let's go!
Nah. Didn't hurt.
Open up!
No good can come of this.
Geppetto, open up!
(grabs Pinocchio)
Stay there and be quiet! (Pinocchio looks round and sees other puppets sitting there; gasps) Don't even breathe! (To Lorenzini) Signore Lorenzini, what can you want?
The honor is mine to call again, my good man.
You see Lorenzini, I have been spending a lot of time in the forest lately, perhaps I can carve you something grand... at the first chance I've got.
I have heard rumors. I bring good news, Geppetto. I am making my grandest production ever, and I am going to purchase... Your newest creation. Whatever it may be. Heh.
Gepetto
(holds up two puppets)
These puppets are made, from the finest cherry wood. You can have these.
(snarls)
Don't toy with me, Geppetto. I would not buy those puppets from you two years ago, and I will not buy them today. So show me your best, and show me NOW!
(Pinocchio falls off his perch)
Oooh! (Runs at Lorenzini and ducks under his legs) Excuse me, coming through!
He is perfect... (Catches a fly) Stay! (Opens his glove, revealing the fly standing on his palm) Boys do like bugs.
Bugs?
They like to tease them, and twist them...and...
Gepetto
Please, Lorenzini!
Ssssssh.
He is magnificent. Name your price.
Judge
(Hammers three times)
Court is now in session.
Guard
Case number 491, your honor. The people versus Luca Antonio Renaldo Geppetto Baldini.
My papa! (hugs Geppetto)
It will be alright, Pinocchio.
Baker's wife (enraged)
There he is, your honor! That little mutilator! He ruined my cannolis! He ruined my fruit tarts!
Judge
Silence, woman!
Baker's wife He even ruined my grandmother's torta della nonna with the pinoli and the chocolate...
Judge
Are you done?
Baker's wife No, I am not done! I would... (the judge hammers loudly)
Judge
Arrest her!
Baker's wife (the guards attempt to grab her and her husband)
Now, I'm done. I'm done. (the bakers sit back down)
Judge
Now, since you, Geppetto, are responsible for this, uh, puppet, how do you plead?
Guilty, sir. (the crowd gasps)
Judge
You will pay twenty-thousand lira to the bakers and ten-thousand to the court.
I--I don't have it. That's--that's three years wages.
Judge
If you cannot pay, then you will go to debtors prison! (hammers hardly) Three years locked away!
Your honor! I propose the court allow me to pay the fines for this poor, impoverished peasant.
Judge
This is most generous of you, Signore Lorenzini.
Kindness is my weakness. Of course, no good deed should go without obligation, so all l ask is to keep Pinocchio in return.
Lorenzini, please, take any other puppet! l will work for you day and night the rest of my life!
Geppetto, is it just money for you? Pinocchio needs a home. All you can offer him is table scraps and cold winter nights, but with me, he will have a family.
What's a family, Papa?
My goodness, such a heartbreaking question, one no one should ever have to ask. Pinocchio, l can give you a life other little boys only dream of.
Judge
What is your decision, Geppetto? (Geppetto looks around the court room. Without any thought or feeling, he looks down at Pinocchio)
Pinocchio...
Yes, Papa?
Listen to me. You're going to go with that man now.
But I want to be with you.
I know, but you see--you see, there--there's no other choice.
You're my papa.
I can't be your papa! You're made of wood! You're not flesh! You're not a real boy! (snaps) NOW, GO! FOR EVERYONE'S GOOD!! (Pinocchio begins to tear up after hearing the harsh words from Geppetto)
Let's go, son. (Pinocchio walks down the steps and Lorenzini picks him up) Good boy. (Lorenzini carries Pinocchio out of the court room as everyone watches sadly)
I love you, Papa! (the scene cuts to Geppetto walking home)
Leona (peeking from her window)
Geppetto... I'm sorry.
Why does everything good get thrown to the beasts? (Geppetto continues walking home as Leona sadly watches him)
Lampwick (notices that the boy took the gun)
That's my gun!
Boy
No, it's mine, lampshade!
Lampwick Nobody calls me lampshade!