Lorenzini Stand by for fireworks. (Munches chili peppers)
Played by Udo Kier 
The Adventures of Pinocchio (1996) · 53 quotes
The Adventures of Pinocchio (1996) · 53 quotes
5th most-quoted character in The Adventures of Pinocchio (1996): in 5 of its 53 quotes
Most scenes with: Pinocchio (3), Geppetto (2)
I see gold out there...little pieces of gold!
More lines from Lorenzini
1 quote Lorenzini Scenes with Lorenzini
3 scenes
Nah. Didn't hurt.
Lorenzini Open up!
No good can come of this.
Lorenzini Geppetto, open up!
(grabs Pinocchio)
Stay there and be quiet! (Pinocchio looks round and sees other puppets sitting there; gasps) Don't even breathe! (To Lorenzini) Signore Lorenzini, what can you want?
Lorenzini The honor is mine to call again, my good man.
You see Lorenzini, I have been spending a lot of time in the forest lately, perhaps I can carve you something grand... at the first chance I've got.
Lorenzini I have heard rumors. I bring good news, Geppetto. I am making my grandest production ever, and I am going to purchase... Your newest creation. Whatever it may be. Heh.
Gepetto
(holds up two puppets)
These puppets are made, from the finest cherry wood. You can have these.
Lorenzini (snarls)
Don't toy with me, Geppetto. I would not buy those puppets from you two years ago, and I will not buy them today. So show me your best, and show me NOW!
(Pinocchio falls off his perch)
Oooh! (Runs at Lorenzini and ducks under his legs) Excuse me, coming through!
Lorenzini He is perfect... (Catches a fly) Stay! (Opens his glove, revealing the fly standing on his palm) Boys do like bugs.
Bugs?
Lorenzini They like to tease them, and twist them...and...
Gepetto
Please, Lorenzini!
Lorenzini Ssssssh.
Lorenzini He is magnificent. Name your price.
Judge
(Hammers three times)
Court is now in session.
Guard
Case number 491, your honor. The people versus Luca Antonio Renaldo Geppetto Baldini.
My papa! (hugs Geppetto)
It will be alright, Pinocchio.
Baker's wife
(enraged)
There he is, your honor! That little mutilator! He ruined my cannolis! He ruined my fruit tarts!
Judge
Silence, woman!
Baker's wife
He even ruined my grandmother's torta della nonna with the pinoli and the chocolate...
Judge
Are you done?
Baker's wife
No, I am not done! I would... (the judge hammers loudly)
Judge
Arrest her!
Baker's wife
(the guards attempt to grab her and her husband)
Now, I'm done. I'm done. (the bakers sit back down)
Judge
Now, since you, Geppetto, are responsible for this, uh, puppet, how do you plead?
Guilty, sir. (the crowd gasps)
Judge
You will pay twenty-thousand lira to the bakers and ten-thousand to the court.
I--I don't have it. That's--that's three years wages.
Judge
If you cannot pay, then you will go to debtors prison! (hammers hardly) Three years locked away!
Lorenzini Your honor! I propose the court allow me to pay the fines for this poor, impoverished peasant.
Judge
This is most generous of you, Signore Lorenzini.
Lorenzini Kindness is my weakness. Of course, no good deed should go without obligation, so all l ask is to keep Pinocchio in return.
Lorenzini, please, take any other puppet! l will work for you day and night the rest of my life!
Lorenzini Geppetto, is it just money for you? Pinocchio needs a home. All you can offer him is table scraps and cold winter nights, but with me, he will have a family.
What's a family, Papa?
Lorenzini My goodness, such a heartbreaking question, one no one should ever have to ask. Pinocchio, l can give you a life other little boys only dream of.
Judge
What is your decision, Geppetto? (Geppetto looks around the court room. Without any thought or feeling, he looks down at Pinocchio)
Pinocchio...
Yes, Papa?
Listen to me. You're going to go with that man now.
But I want to be with you.
I know, but you see--you see, there--there's no other choice.
You're my papa.
I can't be your papa! You're made of wood! You're not flesh! You're not a real boy! (snaps) NOW, GO! FOR EVERYONE'S GOOD!! (Pinocchio begins to tear up after hearing the harsh words from Geppetto)
Lorenzini Let's go, son. (Pinocchio walks down the steps and Lorenzini picks him up) Good boy. (Lorenzini carries Pinocchio out of the court room as everyone watches sadly)
I love you, Papa! (the scene cuts to Geppetto walking home)
Leona
(peeking from her window)
Geppetto... I'm sorry.
Why does everything good get thrown to the beasts? (Geppetto continues walking home as Leona sadly watches him)
Come here! Over here! No, this is all wrong! You gotta believe me! Look, they're trying to trick you! They want us to behave badly! Don't go on the ride! Please! We've been acting like jackasses, so that's what we turned into.
Lorenzini Well, well, well... Here I provide you with the most wonderful place to frolic, and this is the thanks I get. (angrily, to Pinocchio) You steal MY donkeys?
NOT your donkeys! ...This one's Lampwick.
Lorenzini (Tuts)
Pinocchio, a good boy does not go around spreading lies.
It's not a lie. (Points to his nose) My nose grows when I lie.
Lorenzini (Straightens up)
Come on, boys! Take the rides! Drink the water! (Throws tickets to the eager boys)
No, don't!
Lorenzini Be yourselves!
Lampwick. (Lampwick donkey snorts) Come on. (Lampwick neighs and knocks a stunned Lorenzini into the fountain, where he mutates into a sea monster thanks to the curse. When he climbs out, the boys yell in shock)
Boy 1#
He's turning into a monster! Look at his face! (Lorenzini is unable to breathe and smashes through a mirror, jumping into the water which leads to the ocean)
Boy 2#
He was a monster and got what he deserved!
All Boys
YEAH!
