The Simpsons Movie quotes

86 total quotes

Bart
Homer
Lisa
Marge
Multiple Characters

View Quote Homer: [lying dazed on the ground] Homer do good?
Bart: Actually, you doomed us all... again. Nice knowing you, Homer! [storms off]
Homer: Ohhhh, I can't do anything right! [kicks the bomb, causing it to go from 8:31 to 4:11 minutes remaining]
Krusty: GET OUTTA HERE!
[The crowd boos Homer and throws rocks and stuff at him]

View Quote Marge: You can take Spider-Pig with you.
Homer: He's not Spider-Pig anymore, he's Harry Plopper.
[Plopper is shown with Harry Potter-like glasses, brown hair and a lightning bolt scar]

View Quote Government Employee: Hey, everybody, I found one! THE GOVERNMENT ACTUALLY FOUND SOMEONE WE'RE LOOKING FOR!!! YEAH, BABY, YEAH!!!

View Quote Marge: Bart, are you drinking whiskey?
Bart: [drunk] I'm troubled.
Marge: Bart!
Bart: I promise I'll stop tomorrow.
Marge: You'll stop right now!!!
[Marge chases Bart round the room. Bart pulls out draws and jumps over the bed in an attempt to slow Marge down. He holds the whiskey flask in his mouth and tilts his head while running, eventually collapsing]
Bart: I miss Flanders. There, I said it! [passes out]

View Quote Lou: [To Bart, after he skateboards in the nude] Listen, kid, no one likes wearing clothes in public. But, you know, it's the law!

View Quote Tom Hanks: This is Tom Hanks saying if you see me in person, please leave me be.

View Quote Moe Szyslak: [After Lisa reveals that she put polluted water from Lake Springfield in everyone's drinking glasses] This is why we should hate kids!

View Quote Grampa: [Witnessing his own prophecy coming true] That crazy old man in church was right!

View Quote Ralph Wiggum: [after Bart goes past him in the nude on his skateboard] I like men now!

View Quote [At the end, the whole town helps the Simpsons to rebuild their home. Homer tries to hammer in a nail while shingling the roof, in the same manner as earlier]
Homer: Steady... Steady... Steady...
[Bart remembers what happened last time, and gives Homer some safety goggles]
Bart: Here you go, dad.
Homer: [smiles] Thanks, son. [concentrates on the nail again] Steady... [appears to hammer it in successfully] Woohoo!
[As he stands up in triumph, he realises he has actually hammered it into his leg]
Homer: WWWWWWWWHOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
[He runs across the roof in agony, dragging the linked shingles along with him, until he stumbles off the roof. Bart laughs at him.]

View Quote Homer: So long, losers!
[He jumps from treehouse into sinkhole, giving the irate mob the finger, only to realize he's too fat to sink through smoothly]
Homer: Uh-oh. [tries to dig his way deeper]
Moe: The top of his head is still showing. Claw at it!
[Random people claw at Homer's head before it disappears. Groundskeeper Willie's rake also scrapes it, and Nelson's red arrow is embedded in it (his laugh is heard too).]

View Quote Grandpa: Homer?! What the hell are you doing now?
Homer: Risking my life to save people I hate for reasons I don't quite understand. Gotta go!

View Quote Moe: [Wearing a blue robe with a traffic cone on his head and ammunition belts strapped over his chest] Well, I don't mean to brag, but I am now the Emperor of Springfield.
Barney: [offscreen] No you're not! [tosses a Molotov ****tail at Moe]
Moe: Yes I am! [throws it back to Barney, where it explodes offscreen]
Barney: [offscreen, submissive] Okay. Hail Emperor.

View Quote Marge: Homer, you have to go out there, face that mob, and apologize for what you did.
Homer: I would, but I'm afraid that if I open the door, they'll take all of you.
Carl: [offscreen] No we won't. We just want Homer!
Homer: Well maybe not you... but they'll kill Grandpa!
Grandpa: [offscreen] I'm part of the mob!

View Quote [At the very end of the credits, the Squeaky Voiced Teen is seen in the theatre cleaning up.]
Squeaky Voiced Teen: Assistant manager isn't all it's cracked up to be! Four years of film school for this?
[The Squeaky Voiced Teen leaves. The screen fades to black and the movie finally ends.]