The Simpsons Movie quotes

86 total quotes

Bart
Homer
Lisa
Marge
Multiple Characters

View Quote [drunk, to Marge] You just bought another load of crap from the world's fattest fertilizer salesman!

View Quote [attempting to reason with the mob while in a noose] The word 'apology' is tossed around a lot these days, but when it comes from in here-- [Homer motions towards his heart, and someone throws a circular saw at him] D'OH!

View Quote [Bart refuses to help Homer get rid of the bomb and save Springfield.]
Homer: I'll let you hold the bomb...
Bart: [changes his demeanor] The man knows me!
[He joins Homer on his motorcycle, and they drive away to dispose of the bomb]
Todd: I wish Homer was my father.
Ned: [jovially] And I wish you didn't have the Devil's curly hair!
[Todd whimpers]

View Quote Ned Flanders: The good Lord, he's telling me to confess to something.
Homer: [quietly with fingers crossed] Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay!...
Ned Flanders: An immodest sense of pride in our community.
[Pause]
Reverend Lovejoy: Somebody else.

View Quote [At a concert, Green Day are being extremely well received by the citizens of Springfield]
Billie Joe Armstrong: Well, thanks a lot for coming. We've been playing for three and a half hours, and now we'd like just a minute of your time to say something about the environment!
[The crowd is silent for a moment and then starts booing and throwing garbage]
Carl Carlson: Shut up and play!
Barney Gumble: Preachy!
Mike Dirnt: We're not being preachy!
Tr? Cool: But the pollution in your lake, it's dissolving our barge!
Lisa: I thought they touched on a vital issue.
Moe: I beg to differ. [throws a rock through the bass drum and hits Tr? Cool in the crotch]
Tr? Cool: OWW!
[The barge continues to dissolve and starts sinking.]
Mike Dirnt: Gentlemen, it's been an honor playing with you tonight.
[The band members bring out violins and play Nearer, My God, to Thee as the barge sinks in a Titanic-like manner]

View Quote Chief Wiggum [chasing the nude Bart] Stop in the name of American squeamishness!

View Quote Marge: [looking at the 'Pig Crap' silo] Ugh, it's leaking! [drips of feces are falling from the top of the silo to the ground]
Homer: It's not leaking, it's overflowing.
Marge: He filled up the silo in just two days?!
Homer: Well, I helped.

View Quote No, Plopper! If you push that, Daddy will die! [Plopper pauses, then pushes the board off the windowsill, causing the Simpsons to fall to the ground. Homer lands on a red charcoal grill, and spots a shrimp among the coals.] Hey, my luck's beginning to turn!

View Quote Mr. Burns: So... you want some of my electricity, do you? Well, for once the rich white man is in control! I have two buttons behind this desk: one will supply your town with power, the other releases the hounds. Reach me. Make me your brother.

View Quote Chief Wiggum: [After seeing the Simpson family (along with their house) disappear down the sinkhole] Well... they're China's problem now.

View Quote Russ Cargill: I was tricked by an idiot!
Cletus Spuckler: Hey, I know how you feel. I was beat at Tic-tac-toe by a chicken.
[Pause]
Russ Cargill: [cynically] Goodbye.
[Cargill's screen switches off.]

View Quote Nelson Muntz: [as some students from Springfield Elementary prepare to use bows to fire arrows at the Simpsons] I'm using a red arrow, so I know who I kill!

View Quote [whipping some dogs while using them for dog-sledding] Run! Run! [jumping from one slope to the other side] Jump! Jump! Land! Land! [while dogs are resting] Rest! Rest! [after stopping for the night] Now I know we've had a rough day, but I'm sure we can put all that behind us and-- [the dogs maul him] OOOOOOOOOOWW!!!!! AH! That's my whipping arm!! [the dogs abandon him] Oh, why does everything I whip leave me?

View Quote [During the credits, the Simpsons are seen sitting in a movie theatre]
Bart: Come on Dad, let's go! I've been holding it since they put the dome over the town!
Homer: You can wait. A lot of people worked really hard on this film, and all they ask is for you to memorize their names.
Lisa: Well, I want to make sure no animals were harmed during the filming of this movie.
[Lisa sees the words "No animals were harmed during the filming of this movie" on screen.]
Lisa: Phew!
Homer: Okay!
[The family starts to leave. Homer finds popcorn on the floor.]
Homer: Ooh! Floor popcorn!
[Homer eats the popcorn]
[Maggie points frantically at the screen]
Lisa: Wait, wait, wait! It looks like Maggie has something to say!
Marge: Oh my God, her first word!
Maggie: Sequel?
[Pause]
[The family finally leaves]

View Quote Agnes Skinner: [after Bart skateboards past her in the nude] Don't look where I'm pointing!