Mean Girls quotes

View Quote Regina: Why don't I know you?
Cady: I'm new. I just moved here from Africa.
Regina: What?
Cady: I used to be home-schooled.
Regina: Wait... what?
Cady: My mom taught me at home...
Regina: No, I know what home-school is, I'm not ****ed. So you've actually never been to a real school before? Shut up. Shut up!
Cady: I didn't say anything.

View Quote Cady: She took him back. Regina took Aaron back.
Janis: Oh, no, Cady...
Cady: Why would she do that?
Janis: 'Cause she's a life ruiner. She ruins people's lives.

View Quote Ms. Norbery - Sad, old drug pusher.

View Quote Mr. Duvall: Did your teacher ever try to sell you marijuana or ecstasy tablets?
Aaron Samuels: No.
Kevin Gnapoor: What are marijuana tablets?

View Quote Gretchen: [reading from the Burn Book] Trang Pak is a grotsky little byotch.
Regina: Still true.
Gretchen: Dawn Schweitzer is a fat virgin.
Regina: Still half-true.

View Quote Dawn Schweitzer is a fat virgin...Dawn Schweitzer has a huge ass.

View Quote [Mr. Duvall is introducing Cady to the class]
Mr. Duvall: Her name is Cady. Cady Heron. Where are you, Cady?
Cady: That's me. It's pronounced like Katie.
Mr. Duvall: My apologies. I have a nephew named Anfernee, and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact that my sister named him Anfernee.

View Quote I oughta cancel your Spring Fling. (girls shout no! and whisper) Now, I'm not gonna do that because we've already paid the DJ, but don't think I'm not taking this book seriously. Coach Carr has fled school property. Ms. Norbury has been accused of selling drugs. Now what the young ladies in this grade need is an attitude makeover. And you're going to get it, right now. I don't care how long it takes. I will keep you here all night. (Joan the Secretary: We can't keep them past four.) I will keep you here until four.

View Quote Amber D'Alessio masturbated with a hot dog.

View Quote It's been two weeks, and all we've done is make her face smell like a foot.

View Quote [Regina, Karen, Gretchen and Cady listening to Katy Rose's Overdrive] Regina: Cady, do you even know who sings this?
Cady: Um... the Spice Girls?
Regina: [laughs] I love her. She's like a Martian.

View Quote Joan the Secretary: And finally, the nominees for 'Spring Fling Queen'! Regina George...
[class applauds]
Joan the Secretary: Gretchen Wieners.
[class applauds and Gretchen responds breathlessly]
Joan the Secretary: Janis Ian.
[class applauds]
Regina: [Confused] What is happening to the world?
Janis: Damien!
[Janis shoves Damien]
Damian: I couldn't help myself!
Joan the Secretary: And finally, Cady Heron!
[class applauds]
Cady: Damien? You put me in there too? That's not part of the plan!
Damian: I didn't put you in there...
Cady: [surprised] You mean I'm really nominated?

View Quote Janis Ian - D**e!

View Quote [Nice wig Janis, what's it made of?] [Replies] Your mom's chest hair!

View Quote I can't go out...(cough cough) I'm sick