Juno quotes

89 total quotes (ID: 307)

Bren MacGuff
Juno MacGuff
Mac MacGuff
Multiple Characters

Vijay: You should grow a mustache.
Paulie: I can't.
Vijay: Me neither.

[to a barking dog] Jeez, Bananas, shut your freakin' gob, OK?

[to an ultrasound technician] My five-year-old daughter could do that, and let me tell you, she is not the brightest bulb in the tanning bed, so why don't you go back to night school in Manteno and learn a real trade?

As far as boyfriends go, Paulie Bleeker is totally boss. He is the cheese to my macaroni.

Because doctors are sadists who like to play God and watch lesser people scream.

Bleeker is actually great in...in chair.

Bren, use a dick! I love it!

Excuse me, can we get my kid the damn spinal tap already?

Excuse me? I am a sacred vessel, alright? All you've got in your stomach is Taco Bell.

Get a whiff of those sparkling topnotes!

Hey there, big puffy version of Junebug!

Hi, I'm calling to procure a hasty abortion...

Hold on — I'm on my hamburger phone.

I don't know, I just wanted something a little more edgier. I was thinking more like graphic designer, mid-thirties, you know? With a cool Asian girlfriend, who, like dresses awesome and rocks out on the bass guitar. But I don't want to be too particular.

I never realize how much I like being home unless I've been somewhere really different for a while.