I Heart Huckabees

I Heart Huckabees quotes

38 total quotes (ID: 284)

Albert Markovski
Bernard Jaffe
Brad Stand
Dawn Campbell
Multiple Characters
Tommy Corn


How am I not myself? [repeated]


Do I benefit from getting some great P.R. For Huckabees when we need it? Absolutely. But do I care about saving the open spaces?

Yes, I do. Shania hates mayo all right, and she can't eat chicken salad, thats no joke. We gave it to her once, she threw up in the limo - the lady hates chicken salad. So I bring out a bunch of tuna fish sandwiches - she still doesn't believe me - I say, Shania, I'm allergic to mayo - which, by the way, is a lie. Shania still doesn't believe me so I eat two of the sandwiches in front of her to prove it. So she eats one and a half sandwiches, one and a half sandwiches... before she realizes, its chicken salad.

Shania cares!

Why is marriage and kids so important? I mean, there's an overpopulation problem!

[after Caterine snaps a photo of his sobbing] NOBODY SEES THAT PICTURE!!!

Did you see that? Shania knew who I was.

When you get the blanket thing you can relax because everything you could ever want or be you already have and are.

There is no such thing as you or me,

There's no such thing as nothing. There is no remainder in the mathematics of Infinity.

Say this blanket represents all the matter and energy in the universe, okay? This is me, this is you, And over here, this is the Eiffel Tower, right, it's Paris!

No time for infinity? Gotta piece together a theory?

Your mind is always occupied on something...so it may as well be something helpful.

I'm in my tree talking to the Dixie Chicks and they're making me feel better.

Wake up, pretty girl, the joke is on you!