Ferris Bueller's Day Off quotes

84 total quotes

Jeanie Bueller
Multiple Characters
Sloane Peterson

View Quote Pardon my French, but you're an asshole! Asshole!

View Quote Poochie, poochie, poochie! *whistles* Look what Uncle Ed's got for you, you little ****er!

View Quote Something's going on, god damn it!

View Quote Sooner or later, everyone goes to the zoo.

View Quote The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom. I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you a good phoney fever is a deadlock, but you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office—that's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then again, so is high school.

View Quote This is my ninth sick day this semester. It's getting pretty tough coming up with new illnesses. If I go for ten, I'm probably gonna have to barf up a lung. So I better make this one count.

View Quote Well, my name's Jeanine but a lot of guys just call me Shawna.

View Quote What? You're letting him stay home? If I was bleeding out my eyes you guys would make me go to school. This is so unfair!

View Quote [thinking to herself] Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe Ferris isn't such a bad guy. After all, I got a car. He got a computer. But still, why should he get to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants? Why should everything work out for him? What makes him so god damn special? [out loud] Screw him.