Multiple Characters quotes

Economics Teacher: In 1930, the Republican-controlled House of Representatives, in an effort to alleviate the effects of the... Anyone? Anyone? ...the Great Depression, passed the... Anyone? Anyone? The tariff bill? The Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act? Which, anyone? Raised or lowered? ...raised tariffs, in an effort to collect more revenue for the federal government. Did it work? Anyone? Anyone know the effects? It did not work, and the United States sank deeper into the Great Depression. Today we have a similar debate over this. Anyone know what this is? Class? Anyone? Anyone? Anyone seen this before? The Laffer Curve. Anyone know what this says? It says that at this point on the revenue curve, you will get exactly the same amount of revenue as at this point. This is very controversial. Does anyone know what Vice President Bush called this in 1980? Anyone? Something-d-o-o economics. 'Voodoo' economics.

Snooty Waiter: I weep for the future.

Snooty Waiter: I'm suggesting that you leave,... before I have to get snooty!

Singing Telegram Nurse: I heard that you were feeling ill. Headache, fever, and a chill. I came to help restore your pluck, cause I'm the nurse who likes to...[door slammed shut]

Druggie: [to Jeanie] You wear too much eye makeup. My sister wears too much. People think she's a whore.

Economics Teacher: [taking attendance] Bueller?... Bueller?... Bueller?
Simone: Um, he's sick. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with a girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it's pretty serious.
Economics Teacher: Thank you Simone.
Simone: No problem whatsoever.

Ed Rooney: I don't trust this kid any further than I can throw him.
Grace: Well, with your bad knee Ed, you shouldn't throw anybody... Its true.
Ed Rooney: What is so dangerous about a character like Ferris Bueller is he gives good kids bad ideas. Last thing I need at this point in my career is fifteen hundred Ferris Bueller disciples running around these halls. He jeopardizes my ability to effectively govern this student body.
Grace: He makes you look like an ass, is what he does, Ed.
Ed Rooney: Thank you Grace, but I think you're wrong.
Grace: Oh, he's very popular, Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wasteoids, dweebies, dickheads — they all adore him. They all think he's a righteous dude.
Ed Rooney: That is why I need to show these kids that the example he sets is a first-class-ticket-to-nowhere!
Grace: Oh, Ed. You sounded like Dirty Harry just then.
Ed Rooney: Really? Thanks, Grace.

Ed Rooney: Are you also aware, Mrs. Bueller, that Ferris does not have what we consider to be an exemplary attendance record?
Katie Bueller: I don't understand.
Ed Rooney: He has missed an unacceptable number of school days. In the opinion of this educator, Ferris is not taking his academic growth seriously. Now I've spent my morning examining his records. If Ferris thinks that he can just coast through this month and still graduate, he is sorely mistaken. I have no reservations whatsoever about holding him back another year.
Katie Bueller: This is all news to me.
Ed Rooney: It usually is. So far this semester he has been absent nine times.
Katie Bueller: Nine times?
Ed Rooney: Nine times.
Katie Bueller: I don't remember him being sick nine times.
Ed Rooney: That's probably because he wasn't sick. He was skipping school. Wake up and smell the coffee, Mrs. Bueller. It's a fool's paradise. He is just leading you down the primrose path.
Katie Bueller: I can't believe it.
Ed Rooney: I've got it right here in front of me. He has missed nine days...
[His computer screen begins counting down from nine to two. Ferris is at home looking at the same screen]
Ferris: I asked for a car, I got a computer. How's that for being born under a bad sign?

Ferris: Cameron, babe! What's happening?
Cameron: Very little.
Ferris: Is your mother in the room?
Cameron: She's in Decatur. Unfortunately she's not staying.

Ferris: If you're not over here in fifteen minutes, you can find a new best friend.
Cameron: You've been saying that since the fifth grade.

Cameron: [Whispering to himself after hanging up from a phone call with Ferris] I'm dying.
[Phone rings, and Cameron answers]
Ferris: [over the phone] You're not dying, you just can't think of anything good to do. Now be a man! Take some Pepto Bismol and come over here!

Ed Rooney: [talking to Cameron on the phone (who is posing as Sloane's father), thinking it is Ferris] Tell you what dipshit, if you don't like my policies, you can come down here and smooch my big ol' white butt.
Grace: Ed!
Ed Rooney: Pucker up, buttercup. [to Grace] What?
Grace: Ferris Bueller's on line two.

Ferris: Where's your brain?
Cameron: Why'd you kick me?
Ferris: Where's your brain?
Cameron: Why'd you kick me?
Ferris: Where's your brain?
Cameron: I asked you first.
Ferris: How can we pick up Sloane if Rooney is there with her?
Cameron: I said for her to be there alone and you freaked.
Ferris: Now, I didn't hit you. I lightly slapped you.
Cameron: You hit me. Look don't make me participate in your stupid crap if you don't like the way I do it. You make me get out of bed, you make me come over here. You make me make a phony phone call to Edward Rooney? The man could squash my nuts into oblivion. And-and-and then, and then, you deliberately hurt my feelings.

Cameron: The 1961 Ferrari 250 GT California. Less than a hundred were made. My father spent three years restoring this car. It is his love. It is his passion...
Ferris: It is his fault he didn't lock the garage.

Cameron: Ferris, my father loves this car more than life itself.
Ferris: A man with priorities so far out of whack doesn't deserve such a fine automobile.
Cameron: No. No! Apparently, you don't understand!
Ferris: Wow.
Cameron: Ferris, he never drives it! He just rubs it with a diaper!

Ferris: Mr. Rooney would never believe Mr. Peterson drives that piece of shit.
Cameron: It's not piece of shit.
Ferris: It is a piece of shit! Don't worry about it, I don't even have a piece of shit! I have to envy yours.
Cameron: Oh, thanks.

Ferris: Look, it's real simple. Whatever mileage we put on, we'll take off.
Cameron: How?
Ferris: We'll drive home backwards.

Cameron: [Ferris slowly pulls the Ferrari out of the garage] No, Ferris. I'm putting my foot down. You're just gonna have to think of something else. Ferris! We could call a limo! One of those stretch jobs with the TV and the bar. How about that?
Ferris: [Ferris pulls the car back slightly] Come on. Live a little!

Ed Rooney: Between grief and nothing... I'll take grief.
Sloane: Great.

Ferris: Do you have a kiss for Daddy?
Sloane: Are you kidding? [kisses him]
Ed Rooney: [watching them, believing Ferris to be Sloane's father] Hmm. So, that's how it is in their family.

Sloane: What are we going to do?
Ferris: The question isn't "what are we going to do," the question is "what aren't we going to do?"
Cameron: Please don't say were not going to take the car home. Please don't say were not going to take the car home. Please don't say were not going to take the car home.
Ferris: [to the camera] If you had access to a car like this, would you take it back right away? Neither would I.

Ferris: Hi. Do you speak English?
Garage Attendant: Uh, what country do you think this is?

Garage Attendant: You guys got nothing to worry about, I'm a professional.
Cameron: A professional what?

Sloan: What could happen to it? It's in a garage.
Cameron: It could get wrecked, stolen, scratched, breathed on wrong, a pigeon could shit on it! Who knows?

Shermerite: [collecting money] Save Ferris? Save Ferris?
[Solicits Jeannie]
Shermerite: Save Ferris?
Jeannie: Excuse me?
Shermerite: Well, a group of us are collecting money to buy Ferris Bueller a new kidney. Save Ferris?
Jeannie: Go piss up a flagpole.
Shermerite: I'm sorry?
Jeannie: You should be. [Knocks the can out of his hand]

Sloan:: The city looks so peaceful from up here.
Ferris: Anything looks peaceful from one thousand three hundred and fifty-three feet.
Cameron: I think I see my dad.

Ed Rooney: [a baseball game is on TV] What's the score?
Pizza Joint Owner: Nothin' nothin'.
Ed Rooney: Who's winning?
Pizza Joint Owner: The Bears.

Maitre D': You're Abe Froman?
Ferris: That's right, I'm Abe Froman.
Maitre D': The Sausage King of Chicago?
Ferris: Uh yeah, that's me.
Maitre D': Look, I'm very busy. Why don't you take the kids and go back to the clubhouse?
Ferris: Are you suggesting that I'm not who I say I am?
Maitre D': I'm suggesting that you leave before I have to get snooty.
Ferris: Snooty?
Maitre D': Snotty.
Ferris: Snotty?

Cameron: Okay Ferris, can we just let it go, please?
Sloane: Ferris, please. You've gone too far. We're going to get busted.
Ferris: A: You can never go too far. B: If I'm gonna get busted, it is not gonna be by a guy like that.

Maitre D': All right, I've had enough of this-
Ferris: You touch me, I yell rat!

Ferris: Four thousand restaurants in the downtown area, I pick the one my father goes to.
Cameron: We're pinched, for sure.
Ferris: Only the meek get pinched. The bold survive. [adjusts his beret] Let's go.
Cameron: Let's surrender.
Ferris: Never.

Ferris: What's he doing?
Sloane: He's licking the glass and making obscene gestures with his hands.

Boy in Police Station: Drugs?
Jeannie: Thank you, no, I'm straight.
Boy in Police Station: I mean, are you in here for drugs?
Jeannie: Why are you here?
Boy in Police Station: Drugs.
Jeannie: I don't know why I'm here.
Boy in Police Station: Why don't you go home?
Jeannie: Why don't you put your thumb up your butt?

Boy in Police Station: There's someone you should talk to.
Jeannie: If you say Ferris Bueller, you lose a testicle.
Boy in Police Station: Oh, you know him?

Ferris: Ladies and gentlemen, you are such a wonderful crowd, we'd like to play a little tune for you. It's one of my personal favorites and I'd like to dedicate it to a young man who doesn't think he's seen anything good today - Cameron Frye, this one's for you.
Sloane: Ferris! Get off of the float!

Cameron: I don't know what I'm gonna do.
Sloane: College.
Cameron: Yeah, but to do what?
Sloane: What are you interested in?
Cameron: Nothing.
Sloane: Me neither!
Cameron: [to Ferris, who's singing on the parade float] You're crazy!
Sloane: What do you think Ferris is gonna do?
[Ferris begins singing "Twist and Shout"]
Cameron: [after a pause] He's gonna be a fry cook on Venus.

Ferris: Cameron, what have you seen today?
Cameron: Nothing good.
Ferris: Nothing - wha - what do you mean nothing good? We've seen everything good. We've seen the whole city! We went to a museum, we saw priceless works of art! We ate pancreas!

Ferris: Cameron? How many miles did you say this thing had when we left?
Cameron: One hundred and twenty six and halfway between three and four tenths. Why? How many miles are on it now? [glances at odometer, which reads 301.7 miles]
Ferris: [to audience] Here's where Cameron goes berserk.
[Cameron screams, which can be heard all aroun Chicago]

Cameron: What'd I do?
Ferris: You killed the car.

Katie Bueller: I just picked up Jeannie at the police station! She got a speeding ticket, another speeding ticket, and I lost the Vermont deal because of her!
Tom Bueller: I think we should shoot her.

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