Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery

Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery quotes

81 total quotes (ID: 50)

Austin Powers
Doctor Evil
Multiple Characters


Patty O'Brien: They're always after me lucky charms. [Dr. Evil and Frau Farbissina laugh] What? Why does everyone always laugh when I say that? They ARE after me lucky charms! What??
Frau Farbissina: It's a television commercial. With this cartoon leprechaun, and all of these children are trying to chase him, "Hey, leprechaun, leprechaun man, we want to get your lucky charms." Oh! And there are these little tiny pieces of marshmallow just stuck right in the cereal. So when the kids eat them they think, "Oooh this is candy, I'm having fun!"


Frau Farbissina: Send in the femBOTS!

Number Two: My name is Number Two and this is Alotta Fagina.
Austin Powers: Come again?
Alotta Fagina: Alotta Fagina
Austin Powers: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm just not getting it, it sounds like you said your name was a lot of um... never mind!

That's Doctor Evil. I didn't spend six years in Evil Medical School to be called "Mister", thank you very much.

Dr. Evil: Scott, I want you to meet daddy's nemesis, Austin Powers
Scott: What, are you feeding him? Why don't you just kill him?
Dr. Evil: No Scott, I have a better idea. I'm going to place him in an easily escapable situation involving an overly elaborate and exotic death.
Scott: Why don't you kill him now? I mean, come on, we can shoot 'em together it'll be fun. Bang!
Dr. Evil: One more word out of you and you are grounded Mr., and I am not joking!

Let me ask you a question, and be honest — do I make you randy, baby?!

I like to see girls of that... caliber. [pause] By "caliber," of course, I refer to both the size of their gun barrels and the high quality of their characters... two meanings... caliber... it's a homonym... Forget it.

Computer voice: Evacuation com--
[Austin continues to urinate; stops]
Computer voice: Evacuation com--
[Austin continues urinating; stops again]
Computer voice: Evacuation com--
[Austin continues; then stops]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle; slight pause]
Computer voice: Evacuation com--
[Austin continues urination; Basil looks on bewildered]

That makes me angry, and when Dr. Evil gets angry Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset. And when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset, people DIE!

Well, no offense, but if that is a woman, it looks like she was beaten with an ugly stick!

Jimi Hendrix, deceased, drugs. Janis Joplin, deceased, alcohol. Mama Cass, deceased, ham sandwich.

I demand the sum of ... ONE MILLION DOLLARS.

Cowboy: Whoo! That is one crazy get-up, mister... Are you in the show?
Austin Powers: No, actually, I'm English.
Cowboy: Oh... sorry.

Vanessa Kensington: [Referring to events Austin missed over the past thirty years] Thirty years of political and social upheaval. The fall of the Berlin Wall, a female Prime Minister of England, the abolishment of apartheid, a fascinating tapestry of human strum and drang.
Austin Powers: Yeah, and I can't believe Liberace was gay. Women loved him, man. I didn't see that one coming.

Throw me a frickin' bone here!