Come on in. Grab a brew. Don't cost nothin'.

[After the Deltas are expelled] Christ. Seven years of college down the drain. Might as well join the fucking Peace Corps.

[After chugging a bottle of Jack Daniels] Thanks, I needed that.

[to Flounder] Dorfman! What kind of man hits a defenseless animal? I've got a good mind to smash your fat face. Listen up, you nauseating pile of blubber. Your days are numbered at Faber. You and all your sick Delta buddies. Meantime, your ass belongs to me. Now, drop and give me 20.

Eric Stratton, rush chairman. Damn glad to meet you.

You guys playing cards?

Oh, boy, is this great!!

I hope I'm gonna score, oh, boy, oh, boy!

Marion Wormer: [to the mayor] You can take your thumb out of my ass any time now, Carmine.

Mean dude: Do you mind if we dance with your dates?

Clorette De Pasto: Dad! Mom, Dad, this is Larry Kroger. The boy who molested me last month. We have to get married.

Boon: Let's take the cheese.

Hoover: Have you seen Boon?
Katy: He disappeared when we got here. He's probably upstairs talking to Otter.
Hoover: No doubt.
Katy: [to Larry] They're well-known homosexuals.
Hoover: Have another beer, Larry. She's just kidding.

Boon: You going out tonight, Otter?
Otter: Uh-huh.
Boon: Norma?
Otter: No, let me give you a hint. She's got a couple of major-league yabos.
Boon: Beverly!
Otter: No, But you're getting warmer. Let me give you another hint: "Oh God, Oh God, OH GOD!"
Boon: Marlene! You're gonna pork Marlene Desmond!
Otter: Pork?
Boon: You're gonna hump her brains out.
Otter: Boon, I anticipate a deeply religious experience.

Boon: Where are you going?
Katy: Home.
Boon: We just got here.
Katy: No, Boon, you just got here. I've been downstairs for an hour entertaining some kid from Pig's Knuckle, Arkansas.
Boon: Maybe we could drive up to your folks' place this weekend.
Katy: Oh, fabulous. My car filled with your beer buddies going up to empty my parents' liquor cabinet. It's too depressing to think about.
Boon: No! Just gonna be you and me. And Otter and another girl.
Katy: Is this really what you're gonna do for the rest of your life?
Boon: What do you mean?
Katy: Hanging around with a bunch of animals getting drunk every weekend.
Boon: No! After I graduate, I'm gonna get drunk every night.
Katy: Boon, I think I'm in love with a retard.
Boon: Is he bigger than me?