Derek Thompson
[driving in his car, clearly upset about how the game went when he sees Carly and her kids]
Oh great... [gets out the car to see them]
C Carly
Hey honey, how was your game?
Derek Thompson
Not good.
T Tess
Derek, guess what? I have another loose tooth.
Derek Thompson
Good for you, honey.
C Carly
What's the matter, hon?
Derek Thompson
Everything. Nothing, you know. Forget it.
Randy
Can we go practice now?
Derek Thompson
You know what, can we skip today's session. I just don't have it in me.
Randy
But the Talent Show's tomorrow night.
Derek Thompson
You will be fine.
Randy
I need at least one more run through it.
Derek Thompson
No, you don't, okay.
Randy
No, I do need it. I just need a little more practice. Just so I can get down.
Derek Thompson
[snaps]
Hey, hey, hey! It doesn't matter what you do in the Talent Show. You're never gonna be a famous rock star. You're just gonna be another kid with a guitar. [Randy stares, feeling hurt] So do yourself a favor and just give it up, okay?
C Carly
Derek. (Please...)
Derek Thompson
Look, baby. I am sorry but it's for his own good. Trust me. [with his dreams crushed, Randy tearfully smashes his guitar on the ground like a blue shell from Mario Kart. Carly gasps, Tess looks on in shock, while Randy gives one last tearful look at Derek, who looks guilty, before picking up his broken guitar and heading to the car]
Randy
Come on, Tess! (Tess, let's go!) [sobbing]
C Carly
Ugh, what is wrong with you?!
Derek Thompson
(Look.)
I had a bad day.
C Carly
You had a bad day?!
Derek Thompson
Yeah, I had a bad day, okay.
C Carly
No, no. That is not okay! You are never gonna speak to my children again! We are done. [Carly starts heading back to her car]
Derek Thompson
Carly.
C Carly
You know what your problem is, Derek? You can't say what if. [sadly] And you never will. [Carly drives off, leaving Derek feeling awful about what he just did]
Derek Thompson
[trying to sleep after his life was basically ruined when he hears someone knock on the door. He opens it to see Tracy]
Why are you here?
T Tracy
Lily gave me this. [shows a permit showing he's now a tooth fairy in-training] Obviously, it's just a permit but the main thing is I am on the way.
Derek Thompson
Okay well, you should be on your way out of my place. I am going to bed.
T Tracy
No, this is all thanks to you. We got to go out and celebrate. I know a place where all the hot fairy godmothers hang out.
Derek Thompson
Are you out of your mind?! I just lost everything that's important to me! My girlfriend, those kids. And I will probably just hang out my skates for good. All because like an idiot I bought into your tooth fairy garbage. And look where it's gotten me!
T Tracy
What? You make one effort after all these years and it doesn't work out and suddenly you're just gonna give up? It's not suppose to be that easy. And you know it.
Derek Thompson
I will tell you what I do know. I know that you don't have wings. So that means you can't fly. That also means that you can never ever ever be a tooth fairy. And what happens if you try to escape out of a 10-storey building? I will tell you what happens. Splat! Just like that.
T Tracy
[unfazed by Derek's words]
You know what's really sad? The person you hurt the most with all your dream killing is not Randy or Carly or even me. It's you.
Derek Thompson
Get out.
Derek Thompson
Randy.
Randy
What are you doing here?
Derek Thompson
I have to talk to you.
Randy
Go away.
Derek Thompson
Listen. Those things I said yesterday, I was wrong.
Randy
I don't care.
Derek Thompson
You gotta keep playing guitar. You're really good. And nothing you love doing that much could ever be a waste of time. I am so sorry.
Randy
Even if I wanted to, I can't. I smashed my guitar, remember? Tonight is the Talent Show.
Derek Thompson
Hold on a second. [makes a new guitar for Randy with his magic wand] Maybe this will help.
Randy
Whoa, it's awesome. How did you do that?
Derek Thompson
All-purpose magic generator.
Derek Thompson
Tess.
Derek Thompson
Hi, honey.
T Tess
Hi, Derek. I like your costume.
Derek Thompson
I have to tell you something. I was wrong. The tooth fairy. It's real and it's me.
Derek Thompson
No, honey, I am not talking about the hockey tooth fairy. I am a real tooth fairy.
T Tess
[Derek shows her some magic]
You are the real tooth fairy.
Derek Thompson
It will just be our secret, okay.
