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Multiple Characters quotes

BR: We don't sell Tic Tacs, for Christ's sake, we sell cigarettes. And they're cool, available, and addictive. The job is almost done for us.

Senator Ortolan Finistirre: The great state of Vermont will not apologize for its cheese.

Heather Holloway: My other interviews have pinned you as a mass murderer, blood sucker, pimp, profiteer and my personal favorite, yuppie Mephistopheles.

Doak "The Captain" Boykin: You're family now. Tobacco takes care of its own.

Joey Naylor: It's like you always said, Dad, "If you want an easy job, go work for the Red Cross."

Bobby Jay Bliss : It was some pretty ****ed up shit.

Nick Naylor: I speak on behalf of cigarettes.
Child: My mommy says that cigarettes kill.
Nick Naylor: Now, is your mommy a doctor?
Child: No.
Nick Naylor: A scientific researcher of some kind?
Child: No.
Nick Naylor: Now, she doesn't exactly sound like a credible expert now, does she?
Child: [sinks back into her chair]

Nick Naylor: Now, what we need is a smoking role model, a real winner.
Jeff Megall: Indiana Jones meets Jerry Maguire.
Nick Naylor: Right, on two packs a day.

Jeff Megall: Sony has a futuristic sci-fi movie they're looking to make.
Nick Naylor: Cigarettes in space?
Jeff Megall: It's the final frontier, Nick.
Nick Naylor: But wouldn't they blow up in an all-oxygen environment?
Jeff Megall: [Long pause] Probably. But, you know, it's an easy fix. One line of dialogue: "Thank God we created the, you know, whatever device."

Joey: What happens when you're wrong?
Nick Naylor: See, Joey, that's the beauty of argument. When you argue correctly, you're never wrong.

Nick Naylor: Jeff, when do you sleep?
Jeff Megall: Sunday.

[Inside the elevator at Entertainment Global Offices (EGO)]
Jack: Do you hear that?
Nick Naylor (pause): No.
Jack: Exactly!

[Nick Naylor and his son arguing about ice cream]
Joey: So, what happens when you're wrong?
Nick: Well, Joey, I'm never wrong.
Joey: But you can't always be right.
Nick: Well, if it's your job to be right, then you're never wrong.
Joey: But what if you are wrong?
Nick: Okay, let's say that you're defending chocolate and I'm defending vanilla. Now, if I were to say to you, "Vanilla's the best flavor ice cream", you'd say …?
Joey: "No, chocolate is."
Nick: Exactly. But you can't win that argument. So, I'll ask you: So you think chocolate is the end-all and be-all of ice cream, do you?
Joey: It's the best ice cream; I wouldn't order any other.
Nick: Oh. So it's all chocolate for you, is it?
Joey: Yes, chocolate is all I need.
Nick: Well, I need more than chocolate. And for that matter, I need more than vanilla. I believe that we need freedom and choice when it comes to our ice cream, and that, Joey Naylor, that is the definition of liberty.
Joey: But that's not what we're talking about.
Nick: Ah, but that's what I'm talking about.
Joey: But … you didn't prove that vanilla's the best.
Nick: I didn't have to. I proved that you're wrong, and if you're wrong, I'm right.
Joey: But you still didn't convince me.
Nick: Because I'm not after you. I'm after them.

Joey: You're The Sultan of Spin!
Nick: "The Sultan of Spin"?
Joey: Mom subscribes to Newsweek.

Joey: Why did you tell that reporter all your secrets?
Nick: You're too young to understand.
Joey: Mom says it's because you have dependency issues and it was all just a matter of time before you threw it all away on some tramp.
Nick: Well, that's one theory.

[Nick and Heather are introducing themselves to each other]
Heather Holloway: Heather Holloway.
Nick: Nick Naylor. Big Tobacco.
Heather Holloway (holds up tape recorder): Is this kosher?
Nick: Only if I can call you Heather.
Heather Holloway: By all means. So, Mr. Naylor …
Nick (interrupting): Nick.
Heather Holloway: Nick. Let's start with …
Nick: '82 Margaux.
Heather Holloway: Okay. Is it good?
Nick: "Good"? It'll make you believe in God.

Jack: Hey, Neil! Neil! I'm going to impale your mom on a spike and feed her dead body to my dog with syphilis!
Neil: Ha, you got me!
[Jack turns back to Joey and Nick, who both look confused.]
Jack: It's an inside joke.

Nick: What?
Bobby: I got a call from the paper.
Nick: Really? What they want?
Bobby: They wanted to correct spelling of my name and job title.
Polly: You didn't tell her about us, did you?
Nick: Who? … Heather? No! … I mean, maybe in passing.
Polly: In passing.
Bobby: Oh God, he ****ed her. I tried to warn you …
Polly: Hey, he didn't **** her. You didn't **** her, did you? … When?
Bobby: In passing.
Nick: Look, she's a really nice girl.
Bobby: Oh God, we're really ****ed.

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