"Funny" is a person trying to smile without any teeth.
General Zod
Terence Stamp · 28 quotes
Lex Luthor
Gene Hackman · 21 quotes
Lois Lane
Margot Kidder · 15 quotes
Ursa
Sarah Douglas · 14 quotes
Clark Kent
Christopher Reeve · 13 quotes
Perry White
Jackie Cooper · 4 quotes
Jimmy Olsen
Marc McClure · 3 quotes
Jimmy Olson
3 quotes
Jor-El
3 quotes
President
E.G. Marshall · 3 quotes
Kal-El / Superman
2 quotes
Most scenes together: General Zod & Ursa (9), Clark Kent & Lois Lane (8), Lex Luthor & General Zod (7)
Superman II quotes
Page 1 of 6Well, my goodness, you sure look like the cat that has swallowed the canary this morning.
A canary? No, I was thinking of something a lot more bigger. Something that flies. Something more in blue.
Uh, Lois, as usual, I'm totally in the dark-
Let me just turn on the lights for you then. [shows Clark Superman's picture with Clark's description drawn on it] Get the picture?
Hmm...
You know, I didn't start to put this together until this morning, which is really strange because a good reporter isn't supposed to let anything slip by her.
Hmm. Well that's, um, very amusing. Yes. Excuse me.
Amusing?
Yes siree. That's, uh, that's very amusing.
Amusing, huh? Tall, broad shoulders, dark hair; I gotta give you credit, you really had me fooled. And I'm nobody's fool... Superman.
S-Superman? You mean you think I'm Superman?
Willing to bet my life on it.
(laughs)
Lois, you know, you are priceless. Really! I mean that is the single most ridiculous thing I've ever - [Lois opens a window] Lois, what are you doing!?
You wouldn't let me die, Superman!
(Lois promptly jumps)
Council Member #1
You three criminals have been caught in a further act of seditious treason! General Zod, your only feeling was contempt for our society; your only desire was to command! Ursa, the only feeling you showed was for your vicious General; your only wish: to rule at his side. Non, you are as without thought as you are without voice. This council has no hesitation in proclaiming you all...
Council Member #2
Guilty.
Council Member #3
Guilty.
Council Member #4
Guilty.
Council Member #5
Guilty.
Council Member #6
Guilty.
Now. The son of Jor-El will be my slave . . . forever. If not, the millions of Earthlings you protect will pay for your defiance, beginning with this one. I sense the presence of Joe-El here. Destroy this place.
We have no more use for this one. Kill him.
Me?! Lex Luthor? General . . . I showed you through the tough times, remember? I set your insights straight! Y-y-you came to me with nothing! I gave you Superman!
Silence!
[Lex approaches Superman.] [muttering, to Superman]
Guy's a clod! [laughs nervously] Promises were made, gifts exchanged. . . I gotta hand it to you, you know. You always told the truth. Guy always knew where he stood with you.
Son of Jor-El. We were beginning to think you were a coward.
I'm not a coward, Zod.
It is extremely likely you are merely a fool. Like father, like son.
Son of Jor-El. We were beginning to think you were a coward.
Superman
I'm not a coward, Zod.
Let him prove it!
Possibly not. It is extremely likely you are merely a fool. Like father, like son.
Superman
Somehow I just can't hear you, Zod.
[Zod fetches slab of concrete and prepares to throw it at Superman.]
Then die as you deserve to!
This . . . Superman is nothing of the kind! I've discovered his weakness.
Yes.
He cares. He actually cares for these Earth people.
Like pets?
I suppose so.
Sentimental idiot.
(Superman rams the mammoth radio antenna back onto the Metropolis State Building, onto the momentarily supine Non)
He's caged Non.
I'll draw his fire . . . with some of my own.
Wouldn't you know it?
No, but I bet you're a son of a-
Jimmy!
I ask you now to pronounce judgment on those accused: [referring to Non] On this... this mindless aberration, whose only means of expression are wanton violence and destruction. On the woman Ursa, whose perversions and unreasoning hatred of all mankind have threatened even the children of the planet Krypton. Finally, General Zod - chief architect of this intended revolution, and author of this insidious plot, to establish a "New Order" amongst us - with himself as absolute ruler! The decision of the Council will now be heard.
Council Member 1
Guilty!
Council Member 2
Guilty!
Council Member 3
Guilty!
Council Member 4
Guilty.
The vote must be unanimous, Jor-El. It has therefore now become your decision. You alone will condemn us, if you wish, and you alone will be held responsible by me. [Jor-El signals the Phantom Zone] You will bow down before me, Jor-El! I swear it! No matter that it takes an eternity! YOU WILL BOW DOWN BEFORE ME!! BOTH YOU AND THEN, ONE DAY, YOUR HEIRS!!!
Listen carefully, my son, for we shall never speak again. If you hear me now then you have made use of the only means left in you: The crystal source through which our communications begun. The circle is now complete. You have made a dreadful mistake, Kal-El. You did this of your own free will in spite of all I could say to dissuade you.
I, uh...
Now, you have returned to me for one last chance to redeem yourself. This too finally I have anticipated, my son.
Father, no...
Look at me, Kal-El. Once before when you were small, I died while giving you a chance for life. And now, even though it will exhaust the final energy left within me- Look at me, Kal-El. The Kryptonian prophecy will be at once fulfilled. The son becomes the father, the father becomes the son. Farewell forever, Kal-El. Remember me, my son.
Oh, Magnificent One. [bows] What I am bargaining with is what you do not have. The Son of Jor-El.
The Son or Jor-El!
Jor-El!? Our jailor?
Lex Luthor{sarcastic tone}: No, Jorel the baseball player... Non and Ursa move towards him to attack...
Lex Luthor{serious tone}: Yes, Jor-El, your jailor. Ah, possibly you know him better by his nom de voyage, or his... name he travels under — Superman.
You are Superman, aren't you?
Lois, now we've been through these hallucinations of yours before. Can't you see what you almost did? Throwing yourself off a building 30 stories high? Can't you see what a tragic mistake you almost made?
I made a mistake? I made a mistake because I risked my life instead of yours.
And don't fall down 'cause you're just going to have to get up again!
Lois, don't be crazy! LOIS!
[Lois fires at Clark, who is not affected]
It is you. I guess I've know it for the longest time.
Superman
[Clark removes his glasses and reveals himself as Superman]
You realize, of course, if you'd been wrong, Clark Kent would've killed.
With a blank? Gotcha!
Man in Crowd #1
They killed Superman!
Man in Crowd #2
Let's go get 'em!
Man in Crowd #3
Yeah! Come on, I know some judo.
Otis
How're we gonna get over that wall?
How'd we get in here?
Otis
We flew in, don't you remember?
That's how we're gonna get out.
Otis
Oh, no! Not that guy...
Eve Teschmacher
[Offscreen from a balloon]
Psst.
Shh! Did you do "psst?"
Otis
I wish I had, Mr. Luthor, before we left.
Eve Teschmacher
(Luthor grunts angrily at Otis)
Psst.
Not that "psst", that "psst".
Eve Teschmacher
Psst.
Psst?
Otis
Psst.
Don't go "psst" when I go "psst"!
Otis
Oh.
Eve Teschmacher
Psst.
Psst?
Eve Teschmacher
(with some desperation)
Psst.
Otis
Okay. What am I looking for?
You'll know it when you see it.
Otis
Oh. Psst.
Kent, I need a story to run with the page three sidebar. Get me everything you can on this terrorist group.
Right! [stops] Uh, sorry. T... terrorists?
Get your head out of the closet, Kent! Where've you been for the past twelve hours?
Home.
Well, don't you watch television?
Well actually I don't enjoy television, Mister White, there's too much violence. I was just reading Dickens.
He knows where the Eiffel Tower is, Olsen! You do, don't you Kent?
Yes, sir. Has anybody been hurt?
Well, so far the hostages are unharmed.
The hostages?
Yeah! Tourists! About twenty of them!
Yeah, but that's just petty-ante stuff. These guys claim that if the French government doesn't meet their demands, they've got a hydrogen bomb ready to level Paris.
That's why they call them "terrorists", Kent.