Most scenes together: Balthazar Blake & Dave Stutler (7), Dave Stutler & Becky (4), Dave Stutler & Drake (2)
Change into these. [tosses a pair of formal dress shoes at Dave] Rubber soles block the current. Plus, it helps to look classy.
These are old man shoes.
Excuse me?
And I love them. [beat] A lot.
I had a dream. You were insulting me, Dave. Repeatedly.
Me? Pretty weird, huh?
No. Kinda makes sense.
Keep it subtle. Civilians must not know that magic still exists. That would be complicated.
Says the guy in the 350-year-old rawhide trench coat.
You have abused the sacred art, and you have abused the Merlin Circle. Magic isn't a game. No shortcuts! Falling in that water and getting electrocuted, that's how a sorcerer loses his power.
What rule is that?! 14th?! 27th?! I can't even remember! What difference does it make if it's obvious that I can't even control a few mops?!
The stronger the man, the stronger the sorcerer.
Thank you. Thank you for another useless motto.
I have another one for you. You will not control your magic if you will not control yourself. You need to stop your worrying and start believing in yourself.
Is that what you do?
What I do isn't the point.
I think it is. I'm convinced you exist purely to make my life a living hell.
You don't know anything about a living hell. You're making progress.
No, I'm not making progress. No ring, right? No magic. I can't move the chairs. I can't do it. It's not me, Balthazar, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm not it. I'm not a hero. I'm not the Prime Merlinean. I'm just a physics nerd who looks really, really stupid in these shoes.
Something about you is different.
I'm wearing new shoes.
Oh, nice.
How'd you do that? That guy was huge!
I've been doing a lot of cardio boxing lately. Let me introduce "thunder and lightning."
That guy just flew away on an eagle! A steel eagle!
I guess the first thing you should know about me is that I'm a sorcerer.
And I thought my last boyfriend was different 'cause he wore a scarf.
Are you telling me you're trying to possess Tank?
Yes, and I'm not sure it's the best idea either.
No.
Do you know what my life has been like for the past ten years?
I've been stuck in an urn for ten years.
So have I! A figurative urn of ridicule! Did you know that in some parts of the tri-state area they still refer to having a nervous breakdown as "pulling a David Stutler"? Did you know that?!
Try to be a good listener, Dave.
I don't actually know who you are.
Really? You don't recognize me?
Are you in Depeche Mode?
You wanna meet up at my lab?
Yeah.
With me?
Yes.
Okay, just checking.
Can't have anyone hear your girly cries.
Horvath You do not need to see my faculty identification card.
NYU Clerk I do not need to see your faculty identification card.
These are not the droids you are looking for.
Are you insane? [Balthazar thinks, then holds up his fingers an inch apart] Little bit. Okay.
