ALL A B C D E F G H I J K L M
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

[Gargamel looks for a laboratory in New York City and spots a port-a-potty/]
Gargamel: [impressed] Oh. Yes. It's a bit small, but it should do nicely! [climbs into the port-a-potty with Azrael] Oh, it's even got its own cauldron!
[A gurgling sound can be heard]
Gargamel: What died in here? [the port-a-poty shakes and thumping sounds can be heard] OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPPEEENNNN!
[Gargamel and Azrael finally fall out, dizzy and confused]
Gargamel: [choking] Somebody's been working a dark and terrible magic in there! [coughs in disgust]
[After Gargamel runs headlong into the back of a stopped cab, the Smurfs laughed at him as the cab starts moving again and pulled away]
Grouchy Smurf: Knock yourself out, Gargamel!
Gutsy Smurf: You've had that coming for about 30 years!
Gargamel: Smurfs! [as a Anjelou card flew by from the bumper and he grabs it]
Gargamel: [he and Azrael walk around New York, searching for the Smurfs] We must find this Smurf thief. [Azrael meows] Ah, stop your complaining. If I were a Smurf, where would I go? [spots a businessman talking on the phone and approaches him] You there, you there! Fancy pants! Have you seen any little blue men?
Businessman: [on the phone] Absolutely, what price are we talking about?
Gargamel: You're selling them?
[A woman talking on the phone walks by, Gargamel follows her.]
Woman: [on the phone] Have you looked in the drawer, sweetie?
Gargamel: [to the woman] Wait, what drawer?
Woman: [on the phone] In the kitchen, Lily.
Gargamel: Who is this Lily?
[A man also talking on the phone walks by.]
Man: [on the phone] Are you kidding? She's like the hottest girl in my apartment.
Gargamel: [stops the man] Please, please. Please, young woodsman. What does the temperature of this Lily have to do with the finding of Smurfs?
Man: [to Gargamel] Take your meds, man. [walks away]
Gargamel: [confused] What? I, I... [shouts] IS EVERYONE IN THIS REALM COMPLETELY INSANE?! [spots a peddlar] Oh, thank the gods. A local wizard. Excellent. [to the peddlar] Eh pardon me, wise sir? By any chance, have you seen any little blue men?
Peddlar: They're everywhere! [laughs maniacally and walks away]
Gargamel: I knew it. I knew it! I told you we were close, Azrael!
Azrael: [unenthusiascally] I know.
Patrick: Oh by the way, I wouldn't go anywhere if I were you.
Smurfette: Well, why not?
Patrick: Our world doesn't really do well with people from other places. I mean, look what happened to E.T.! [The Smurfs look at Patrick, confused] It's a movie. A moving picture? Book? Just stay. Okay? [Walks out the door]
Patrick: Grace, we're being attacked! Do not be fooled by their cuteness!
Grace: It's okay, it's okay. [Cuts to the Smurfs gathered around her bare feet; so close that they can smell her toes]
Grace: They're friendly!
Grace: How can you be the girl in the village?
Smurfette: Well see, I wasn't brought by a stork like the others. I was created by Gargamel to trap the other Smurfs.
Grace: Wow! And then what happened?
Smurfette: Papa saved me. He cast a special spell, and then helped become the Smurf I was meant to be.
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