N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

[Sarah answers the ringing phone]
Sarah: Director's office.
Roman Bridger: Sarah, it's Roman. I'm sorry I'm running late. I'm still on the 405. I'm about 10 minutes away.
Sarah: Oh, it's no problem. I'm just looking at your music video awards.
Roman Bridger: Uh, look, since I got you on the phone, let's talk about your character, okay?
Sarah: What character? I'm Candy, the chick who gets killed second. I'm only in two scenes.
Roman Bridger: You're not happy with your part.
Sarah: I'm not happy that I am 35 playing a 21 year-old. I'm not happy that I have to die naked. And I'm not happy that my character is too stupid to have a gun in the house after her boyfriend's been cut into fish sticks.
Roman Bridger: Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Great, okay. So let's run the lines.
Sarah: Fine.
Roman Bridger: Page 28. Candy's big moment.
Sarah: Page 28. "Ring-ring. Hello?"
Roman Bridger: "Hello?"
Sarah: "Who's this?"
Roman Bridger: "Who's this?"
Sarah: "This is Candy. Hang on, let me get some clothes." See? I don't understand why I have to start the scene in the shower. The whole shower thing's been done. Vertigo. Hello? And I mean, my boyfriend just died. Why am I showering?
Roman Bridger: [sighs] Why don't we just read the scene? "Candy. Nice name. Is that like Candy Cane or Candy Apple?"
Sarah: Whatever. "Come on, who is this? I think you have the wrong number."
Roman Bridger: "But you know my favorite name?"
Sarah: "I'm hanging up right now."
Roman Bridger: "It's Sarah."
Sarah: [confused] Roman, that's not the line.
Roman Bridger: It is in my script.
Sarah: Has there been another goddamn rewrite? How the **** are we supposed to learn our lines when there's a new script every 15 minutes?
Roman Bridger: It's not just a new script. It's a new movie.
Sarah: What? What movie?
Roman Bridger: My movie.
[Roman's voice suddenly changes]
Phone Voice: And it's called Sarah Gets Skewered Like a ****ing Pig! [Sarah's eyes widen] Still in character, Sarah?
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