A character in Plan 9 from Outer Space (1957)

Col. Edwards quotes from Plan 9 from Outer Space (1957)

Tom Keene

3rd most-quoted character in Plan 9 from Outer Space (1957): in 9 of its 42 quotes
Most scenes with: Lt. Harper (5), Jeff (3)

Scenes with Col. Edwards

9 scenes
Soldier

Quite a sight, wasn't it Sir?

Col. Edwards

A sight I'd rather not be seeing.

Soldier

Are you worried about them, Sir?

Col. Edwards

Well, they must have a reason for their visits.

Soldier

Visits? Well that would indicate visitors! Are big guns the usual way of welcoming visitors?

Col. Edwards

We haven't always fired at them.

Soldier

Oh?

Col. Edwards

For a time we tried to contact them by radio, but no response. Then they attacked a town. A small town, I'll admit. But nevertheless a town of people. People who died.

Soldier

I never heard about that, Sir.

Col. Edwards

Well, it was covered up by the higher echelon. Take any fire, any earthquake, any major disaster, then wonder. Flying saucers, Captain, are still a rumour. Officially.

Air Force Captain

Looks like we beat them off again, Sir.

Col. Edwards

What do they want...where are they from...where are they going...

Air Force Captain

They, Sir? Who? Oh, this is a training maneuver, Sir. We only did a little practice firing at the clouds.

Col. Edwards

Yeah. I wonder what their next move will be.

What will their next move be?

Gen. Roberts

Sit down. I understand, Colonel, you've been on tap for many of our saucer attacks.

Col. Edwards

I'm in charge of field operations, Sir.

Gen. Roberts

You believe there are such things as flying saucers, Colonel?

Col. Edwards

Yessir.

Gen. Roberts

You've seen them?

Col. Edwards

Yessir.

Gen. Roberts

You realize there's a government directive stating that there is no such thing as a flying saucer?

Col. Edwards

Yessir.

Gen Roberts

Do you stand by your statement that you've seen flying saucers?

Col. Edwards

Well, uh, yessir.

Gen. Roberts

This could mean a court marshall. Admitting this against direct orders.

Col. Edwards

General Roberts, may I speak freely?

Gen. Roberts

You may.

Col. Edwards

How could I hope to hold down my command if I didn't believe in what I saw and shot at?

Gen. Roberts

I, uh, like you Colonel.

Col. Edwards

Thank you, Sir.

Gen. Roberts

There are flying saucers. There's no doubt they are in our skies. They've been there for some time.

Col. Edwards

What're we going to do about them?

Gen. Roberts

Who knows?

Gen. Roberts

You ever been to Hollywood?

Col. Edwards

Oh a couple of times. A few years ago.

Gen. Roberts

You're going to be there in the morning. Just a few minutes from Hollywood, in the town of San Fernando, reports have come in of saucers flying so low the exhaust knocked people to the ground. There have even been stated claims of saucer landings. Major Carlson will replace you while you're out there. You're the best man for the job of attempting to contact them. Find them, Colonel. See what in hell it is they want!

Col. Edwards

This is the most fantastic story I've ever heard.

And every word of it's true, too.

Col. Edwards

That's the fantastic part of it.

[at the cemetery]

Colonel I've been out here so often you'd think I'd taken a lease on this place.

Col. Edwards

Not a long lease, I hope.

I see what you mean. But you know, I can't help but feel the answer's out here somewhere.

Col. Edwards

Is the, uh, girl safe?

Mrs. Trent you'd better stay with the car.

Stay here alone? Not on your life.

Modern women...

Col. Edwards

Yeah, they been that way all down through the ages. Especially in a spot like this.

Col. Edwards
[at Clay's grave]

Looks to me like someone had broken out instead of in.

I figured that, but that's impossible!

Col. Edwards

I wonder.

Look, Colonel, some things just can't happen.

Col. Edwards

Yeah, well after that apparition that was draped across Mr. Trent's patio, I would say we should keep our minds open to anything.

Look, Colonel, I'm a policeman. I've got to deal in facts. But, I guess I'll have to go along with you. You know I bet my badge right now we haven't seen the last of those weirdies.

You goin' in that thing?

Col. Edwards

That's what we're here for.

I don't know, the way these things speed around we might just get in there and pft! Off it goes.

Col. Edwards

That's a chance we take.

Well, I took a chance on those earlier airplanes. Might just as well see what the inside of one of these looks like. Got your guns ready?

I tell you one thing, if a little green man jumps out at me I'm shooting first and asking questions later.

You fiend!

I? A fiend? I am a soldier of our planet! I? A fiend? We did not come here as enemies. We came only with friendly intentions. To talk. To ask your aid.

Col. Edwards

Our aid?

Yes. Your aid for the whole universe. But your governments of Earth refused even to accept our existence. Even though you've seen us, heard our messages, you still refused to accept us.

Col. Edwards

Why is it so important that you want to contact the governments of our Earth?

Because of death. Because all you of Earth are idiots!

Now you just hold on, Buster.

No, you hold on. First was your firecracker, a harmless explosive. Then your handgrenade. They began to kill your own people a few at a time. Then the bomb, then a larger bomb. Many people are killed at one time. Then your scientists stumbled upon the atom bomb. Split the atom. Then the hydrogen bomb, where you actually explode the air itself. Now you bring the destruction of the entire universe, served by our sun. The only explosion left is the solarbonite.

Col. Edwards

Why there's no such thing.

Perhaps to you. But we've known it for centuries. Your scientists will stumble upon it as they have all the others. But the juvenile minds you possess will not comprehend its strength, until it's too late.

Col. Edwards

You're way above our heads.

The solarbonite is a way to explode the actual particles of sunlight.

Col. Edwards

Why, that's impossible.

Even now, your scientists are working on a way to harness the sun's rays. The rays of sunlight are minute particles. Is it so far from your imagination they cannot do as I have suggested?

Col. Edwards

Why, a particle of sunlight can't even be seen or measured.

Can you see or measure an atom? Yet you can explode one. A ray of sunlight is made up of many atoms!

So what if we do develop this Solanite bomb? We'd be even a stronger nation than now.

Stronger. You see!? You see!? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!

That's all I'm taking from you! [leaps at Eros]

Get back here you jerk! Let him finish.

It's because of men like you that all must be destroyed. Headstrong, violent! No use of the mind God gave you.

You talk of God?

You also think it impossible that we, too, might think of God? You, who wear the uniform of your country. You see, I wear the uniform of my country. Yes, we've had to use drastic means to get to you, but you left us no alternative. When you have the solarbonite, you have nothing. Nor, does the universe.

Col. Edwards

You speak of solarbonite, but just what is it?

Take a can of your gasoline. Say this can of gasoline is the sun. Now you spread a thin line of it to a ball, representing the Earth. Now, the gasoline represents the sunlight, the sun particles. Here we saturate the ball with the gasoline, the sunlight. Then we put a flame to the ball. The flame will speedily travel around the Earth, back along the line of gasoline to can, or the sun itself. It will explode this source, and spread to every place that gasoline, or sunlight, touches. Explode the sunlight here, Gentlemen, and you explode the universe. Explode the sunlight here, and a chain reaction will occur, direct to the sun itself. And to all the planets that sunlight touches. To every planet in the universe. This why you must be stopped. This is why any means must be used to stop you. In a friendly manner, or as it seems, you want it.

He's mad.

Tanna

Mad? Is it mad that you destroy other people to save yourselves? You have done this. Is it mad that one country must destroy another to save themselves? You have also done this. How then is it mad that one planet must destroy another that threatens the very existence-

That's enough!! In my land, women are for advancing the race, not for fighting man's battles. Life is not so expansive on my planet. We don't cling to it like you do. Our entire aim is for the development of our planet.

Oh, I wonder if that's the last we'll see of them?

Col. Edwards

Perhaps, but sooner or later there'll be others.

Other characters in Plan 9 from Outer Space