Mister O'Connell, can you look me in the eye, and guarantee me that this isn't all some kind of a flimflam? Because I am warning you...
You're 'warning me'? Lady, let me put it to you this way. My whole damn garrison believed in this city so much, that - without orders - they marched halfway across Libya and into Egypt just to 'find' that city. And when we got there...all we found was sand, and blood. (Evie looks stunned) Lemme get your bags.
Jonathan [to Evie]
Yes, you're right. Filthy, rude, complete scoundrel, nothing to like there at all.
You came back from the desert with a new friend, didn't you, Beni?
What friend? You are my only friend.
[Picks him up and slams him on the table]
Why the hell are you hanging around this guy?! What's in it for you?
It is better to be at the right hand of the devil than in his path. As long as I serve him, I am immune.
[smashing him against a wardrobe]
Immune from what?
Piszkos állat...(Filthy animal)
I don't wanna tell you- you'll just hurt me some more.
What are you looking for? And try not to lie to me! (Holds Beni up against a ceiling fan)
AHH! The book! The black book they found in Hamunaptra! He wants it back! He said to me it would be worth its weight in gold!
Jonathan What does he want the book for?
Oh come on, I don't know... (Rick shoves him closer to the fan) AH! Something about bringing his dead girlfriend back to life! But that's all, I swear! Just the book, I swear... (Rick lowers him to the floor, Beni glances at Jonathan) And your sister. (sees the look on Rick's face) but other than that...!
You told me you got it on a dig down in Thebes!
J Johnathan
Yes, well, I was mistaken.
Jonathan I lie to everybody, what makes you so special?
Jonathan Yes, well, that just makes you more gullible.
So what has your little problem got to do with His Majesty's Royal Air Corps?
Well, you probably won't live through it.
(excitedly)
By Jove! Do you really think so?
Jonathan Well, everybody else we've bumped into has died. Why not you?
[Rick and the rest of the group make a toast; drinks their shots, then spits them out in disgust; scene cuts to show others in the bar spitting out their drinks as well] [wipes lips]
Sweet Jesus! It tasted just like—
[drops shot glass in shock; stands up]
Blood!
Jonathan [Camera focuses on water fountain Rick is seeing; water is blood red] [quoting from Bible]
"And the rivers and waters in Egypt ran red, and were as blood..."
[about Imhotep]
He's here...
Jonathan Two questions: Who the hell was Seti the First, and, was he rich?
He was the second Pharaoh of the Nineteenth Dynasty, said to be the wealthiest pharaoh of them all.
Jonathan Good. That's good. I like this fellow, I like him ve-ry much.
(taking a break from trying to open the floor under Anubis)
Ooh, and you know how they took out your brains?
Jonathan (playing stone golf)
Evie, I don't think we need to know this...
They take a sharp, red hot poker, stick it up your nose, scramble things about a bit, and then rip it all out through your nostrils.
Oofh, that's gotta hurt...
It's called mummification, you'll be dead when they do this...
For the record, if I don't make it out of here, don't put me down for mummification...
Jonathan Likewise. [hits a stone and the ceiling near them gives way]
When I saw him alive at Hamunaptra, he called me "Anck-Su-Namun." And just now when we were at Mr. Burn's quarters, he tried to kiss me.
CT Curator Terrence Bey
It's because of his love for Anck-Su-Namun that he was cursed. Apparently, even after 3000 years...
He's still in love with her.
Yes, that is very romantic, but what has it got to do with me?
perhaps he will once again try to raise her from the dead.
CT Curator Terrence Bey
Yes. And it appears he has already chosen his human sacrifice (He and Ardeth look pointedly at Evelyn)
Jonathan Bad luck, old mum.
We must stop him from regenerating. Who opened that chest?
Well, there was me and Daniels here. And Burns, of course...
And that Egyptologist fella.
What about my buddy Beni?
Nah, he scrammed out of there before we opened the damn thing.
Yeah, he was the smart one.
Yeah...that sounds like Beni.
We must find the Egyptologist and bring him back to the safety of the fort before the creature can get to him.
Right. (Points to Evelyn) She stays here. (To Daniels, Henderson and Jonathan) You three come with me.
[Rick turns to leave, but they all shout in protest]
Oh, no way!
Just a minute, you can't just leave me behind here like some old kind of carpetbag, I mean, who put you in charge - (Rick throws her over his shoulder) O'Connell! What do you think you are doing? Jonathan! O'Connell!
Jonathan Er...sorry, Evie, he's, er...a bit...tall...
[Rick dumps Evelyn on her bed and locks her in her bedroom.]
This door doesn't open. She doesn't come out and no one goes in. Right?
Jonathan Er, well, I thought I could just stay at the fort, and er...reconnoiter...
Jonathan Yeah, right, (To Americans) we're just going to rescue the, er, Egyptologist...
