[at the end of the film]
Well, that's it. The big wrap-up. The happy ending. The grand finale.
Well, Pumbaa, that's the thing about endings. They come at the end.
Oh, can we watch it again?
Pumbaa, we just saw it. Maybe tomorrow.
M Ma
[enters]
Hey, what're you guys doin'? [notices the film and gasps] You didn't tell me you were watching the movie! I wanna watch, too!
Ma! We just finished! Show's over!
M Ma
Well, you're just gonna hafta rewind it. [runs the film back]
M Ma
Uncle Max! We're gonna watch the movie!
[enters with popcorn]
Hey, I brought extra butter!
S Simba
[enters]
Hey, you guys are watching the movie?
[enters with laughter]
Any story worth telling is worth telling twice!
[many a Disney character enters the theater]
What the--?
SW Snow White
Oh, excuse me.
D Dwarves
[one by one, save for Grumpy]
Excuse me.
G Grumpy
Get outta the way.
Who is this crowd? Hey! Down in front!
G Goofy
[Stitch bounces repeatedly from one character to another]
Gawrsh!
[Peter Pan crows like a rooster]
Watch it!
[he gets stuck in between two characters, then approaches Pumbaa]
Okay, buddy. You win.
[he grabs the remote and starts the film]
Timon, I still don't do so well in crowds.
I was just trying to shed a little light on our pathetic existence.
M Ma
[The scene transitions to a grassy plain. Ma continues to walk side-by-side with Timon. She dusts off his side.]
Timon, [Ma darts behind Timon to dust off his back.] this can't go on. Just this month, [Ma darts back to Timon's side to dust it off.] you've pulled down four walls and collapsed two tunnel exits. [Ma licks one paw and uses it to smooth down Timon's hair.] We have to look after each other. Our survival depends on it.
[Ma continues to smooth down Timon's hair.]
What's the point? All we do is dig so we can hide and hide so we can dig. [Ma stops combing Timon's hair, which immediately poofs up. He glares up at it with one eye closed. Then he holds his head with both hands.] I want to be where we don't have to dig tunnels and [Timon strides away from Ma.] live with our heads stuck in the sand. [Timon parts some nearby grass.] What's so bad about dreaming of a better home?
M Ma
[Ma joins Timon, who is overlooking the open savanna.]
I wanna show you something. [Ma looks out over the savanna.] Look, Timon. [Ma uses one paw to angle Timon's head toward the savanna.] Go on, look. Look out to the horizon, [The camera slowly pans out to reveal the Pride Lands in all its glory.] past the trees, over the grasslands. [Timon stares in awe and grins.] Everything the light touches. Belongs to someone else.
[Timon's expression turns to confusion, then annoyance. The grass falls back into place, hiding him from view.] [from off-screen]
Funny. I thought you were going a whole different direction with this.
M Ma
[Ma leads Timon away from the grass.]
What can I say? It's nature's design.
[Uncle Max pokes his head through some nearby grass, causing Timon and Ma to pull up short.] Uncle Max: She's right! [Uncle Max shakes Timon.] We're food for other animals. [Uncle Max swings Timon back and forth as he looks from left to right.] A moveable feast. [Uncle Max hugs Timon close.] Feared by no one and eaten by all!
But when they die, they become the grass. And we eat the grass, right?
Uncle Max: Not exactly. We can't digest grass. We're grass intolerant.
M Ma
[Ma approaches and pulls Timon out of Uncle Max's grip.]
Okay, Max.
[Uncle Max nibbles at his fingernails.] Uncle Max: *whimpers*
M Ma
Thank you. You've been a big help. [to Timon] Honey, I–
[Uncle Max erupts from the grass in front of Timon and Ma, halting them in their tracks.] Uncle Max: Meerkat! It's what's for dinner!
M Ma
[Ma darts in front of Timon and points accusingly at Uncle Max.]
Thank you, Uncle Max!
Uncle Max: Ugh.
[Uncle Max disappears into the grass.]
I think Uncle Max [Timon makes the sign for "crazy."] dislodged one too many rocks with his skull.
M Ma
[Ma steps in front of Timon.]
But he's right, Timon. [Ma licks one paw and uses it to smooth down Timon's hair.] Oh, I just [Ma squashes a nearby flying insect in her paws and uses it on Timon's hair like it's gel.] know there's a way for you to fit in here.
[Timon looks up pitifully with his hair smoothed down. A single strand flicks up.]
*sighs*
Uncle Max: [from offscreen] All right. Who's on sentry duty?
M Ma
[Ma thinks for a moment. Then her face lights up.]
That's it! [Ma seizes Timon by the arms. He looks back uncertainly.] That's it! My son on sentry duty! Timon the sentry!
[The scene transitions to the open savanna. Timon and Uncle Max stand on a rock beneath a short tree. Uncle Max scurries along the ground, sniffs the air, then flinches.]
Uncle Max: Scurry, sniff, flinch! [Uncle Max repeats the demonstration. Timon stands on the ground nearby, leaning one-armed against the tree.] Scurry, sniff, flinch! [Timon rolls his eyes.] Scurry, sniff, flinch! [Uncle Max tucks a stick under his arm like a he's a drill sergeant.] Good. Now, [Uncle Max slides down the rock to the ground and walks side-by-side with Timon.] what do we do if we see a hyena?
Scream, "Mommy!"?
[Timon and Uncle Max pause. Uncle Max points his finger at Timon.] Uncle Max: That's right, mister! Because [Uncle Max grabs Timon by the shoulder and points a finger again at the savanna.] the world out there is fraught with danger. [Uncle Max shakes Timon.] Fraught, I tell you!
Oh, boy. It's the fraught fest.
Uncle Max: [in the background] Even all bloodthirsty hyenas are waiting to rip us limb from limb!
Bravo, Uncle Max. [Timon claps.] Way to sell it to the cheap seats.
[Uncle Max seizes Timon by the wrists.] Uncle Max: Applaud now, sonny boy! [severely] But try clapping when you don't have any hands.
[Uncle Max stalks offscreen. Timon stares at his hands.]
*gulps* [Timon darts onto the rock. He scurries along the ground, sniffs the air, then flinches.] Scurry, sniff, flinch. [The savanna is peaceful and quiet. Timon looks back and forth. He repeats the exercise.] Scurry, sniff, flinch. [The savanna is peaceful and quiet. Music starts playing softly.] Huh. [Timon smiles.] I like the sound of that. [Timon repeats the exercise.] Scurry, sniff, flinch. [The savanna is peaceful and quiet. Timon continues to repeat the exercise. As he does so, he begins to dance, more and more flamboyantly.] Scurry, sniff, flinch. Scurry, sniff, flinch. Scurry, sniff, flinch! ♪ There's more to life than panic and bein' some other guy's snack. [Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed emerge from behind a nearby rock.] Eugh! [Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed duck out of view.] I may be delicious, organic, [Timon swings his fists at the air.] but this little entree's fightin' back! [Timon swings his fist so hard that he spins around several times. He begins strutting across the rock, then grabs onto the tree's trunk.] I'm gonna put diggin' tunnels behind me and live at a new altitude. [Timon climbs up onto a branch and throws an armful of leaves into the air.] I'm gonna reach for the stars to remind me that meerkats are not merely food! [Timon steps onto a nearby cloud.] For once I'll be [Timon surfs away on the cloud.] lookin' out for me. [The cloud drifts into an idyllic jungle paradise.] Yeah! [Timon dives off the cloud into a waterfall below.] I'll tell you what I want. [Timon slides down the waterfall.] This cat is movin' on, [The momentum of Timon's fall throws him into the air.] where he's a bon vivant [Timon dives into a pool below.] who's missin' out on bon. [Timon swims underwater.] I'd be a bigger cheese far from the desert scene. [Timon disappears into a school of fish, which turns into a pile of butterflies.] A little cooling breeze. [The butterflies part one by one.] A little patch of green! [The butterflies part fully to reveal Timon holding a drink and lounging in a hammock by a waterfall. Two peacocks fan him with their tails.] And I'll be snoozin' in my hammock by a rippling stream, many miles from any tunnel and the digging team. [A pile of grubs dominates the screen. The grubs partially morph into Timon's face.] Looking after number one will be my only creed. That's all I need. [Timon eats the grubs.] *slurps* [Timon lifts his hands into the air.] That's all I need! [Timon dances the "Shuffle Off to Buffalo" atop a mound of grubs.] I've always been good at runnin' away. [Timon switches directions and repeats the dance.] Well, now, I'm gonna run the show-oh! [The lights darken overhead, and the jungle backdrop slides offscreen, as if it's part of a theater production. Timon stands alone on his rock in the savanna.] I've always been seen as the ultimate prey, [Timon lifts his hands into the air.] but now, my status ain't so quo! [Banzai and Ed emerge on either side of Timon.] A dream sublime. [Shenzi emerges behind Timon, who lifts his hands into the air.] It's hyena time! [Shenzi claps, startling Timon.] Oh! ♪
S Shenzi
[After the That's All I Need song] [applauds]
Oh, look, it's dinner and a show.
B Banzai
[snickers evilly]
And I thought beans were the only musical food. [Ed laughs evilly]
S Shenzi
Well, hi to you, too. [smacks Timon with her paw, who rolls down the hill]
[bumps into Uncle Max]
Aw. I'm okay.
This is no time for horseplay, Timon. You're supposed to be up there looking out for... [Shenzi, Ed and Banzai the hyenas go near] HYENAS!!!
B Banzai
[The meerkats gasp, then run and scatter in panic, while screaming and waving their hands in the air.] [Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed stand over the meerkat colony running in horror and fear, watching them.]
Whoa, look at 'em scramble!
S Shenzi
[Shenzi crouches.]
And that's just how I like them...
[Uncle Max, who is running, pulls up short.]
*screams*
[Behind him, several meerkats crash into him, pushing him into Shenzi's snout.]
*grunt*
S Shenzi
Scrambled...
[Shenzi licks Uncle Max, lifting him into the air.] Uncle Max:' *screams*
S Shenzi
And a little bit runny.
[The colony runs around in a panic.]
*scream* [Several meerkats race past Timon, who ducks, with his hands covering his head.] Hyenas!
SA Shenzi and Banzai
[Shenzi and Banzai race after the meerkats, ignoring Timon.]
*laugh*
E Ed
[Ed races after Shenzi and Banzai, ignoring Timon.]
*laughs*
[After the hyenas pass, Timon lowers his hands and relaxes.]
*sighs*
M Ma
[From behind, a hand grabs Timon and starts to drag him into a hole in the ground. He resists, but is eventually pulled underground. It is revealed that the hand belongs to Ma.]
Get in here! What are you, a meshugginah? [shakes Timon]
[Several meerkats dive for cover in a hole in the ground, while Ed snaps at them.]
*whimper* [Ed continually misses the meerkats, who slip by him to safety.] *screams* Whoa!
E Ed
[Uncle Max runs for the hole, but Ed covers it with both paws and grins evilly.]
*laughs*
[Uncle Max skids to a halt.]
*gasps*
E Ed
[Ed grins down at Uncle Max, tongue lolling.]
*laughs*
M Ma
[Underground, the meerkat colony gathers in a tense huddle around Ma and Timon.]
Stumpy?
S Stumpy
[from offscreen]
Here!
F Flinchy
[from offscreen]
Here!
S Swifty
[from offscreen]
Here!
M Ma
[Ma rubs her forehead.]
Oh, what a relief. Everybody's... *gasps* Where's Uncle Max?
[Uncle Max runs from Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed.]
*screams*
SB Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed
*yip*
[Several meerkats emerge from a hole in the ground and spot Uncle Max.]
*gasp*
M Meerkat
[Uncle Max dodges several attacks from Shenzi and Banzai.]
Max! Run for your life!
M Meerkat
[from offscreen]
Play dead!
M Meerkat
[from offscreen]
Ándale!
M Meerkat
[from offscreen]
Almost there!
[The channel suddenly changes to the show, revealing a woman talking about the purse.]
Hey, what's going on? Pumbaa, you're sitting on the remote?
[realizes]
Huh? Oh, sorry. I thought it was a brownie. [changes it back to Uncle Max being chased by hyenas]
[chuckles]
It means "no worries."
So, I told the boy: To find Hakuna Matata, you must look beyond what you see.
Well, actually, it's not a... [Ma hits him in the head with his own stick] Ah!
M Ma
You used a metaphor on Timon?! He takes things literally! That's it. He's starving out there. I just know it! Max! Timon's out there chasing metaphors. I've got to go find him!
Uncle Max: [from offscreen] Are you nuts?!
M Ma
Nice to have a supportive family, isn't it? Well, here I go.
Remember, the journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.
M Ma
Thanks. Here's my first step. [stomps on Rafiki's foot, and the scene cuts to Timon screaming]
[Screams]
OW!!!!!! [pauses; Pumbaa pulls one of three quills from his butt] Aye!!!
This bowling for porcupines [spits the first quill] wasn't the best idea, huh?
Yeah, it got to be right up there with bobbin' for snapping turtles. Ow-ah-ahaha!!
That's going to leave a mark. [spits the second quill] Look, Timon. Buzzards! What do you say? One more round?
Sure. There must be some part of me we haven't injured yet.
Please? Please, please, please, please, please?
No, Pumbaa. I'm beat. You go ahead. I'm calling it a day. [leaves while pulling out the last quill from his butt]
But it's no fun alone. [whimpers in sadness before Timon jumps on his back]
Why not? One more run won't change our lives!
