N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

Colonel Stars and Stripes: [to Eisenhower] You have to stay in there till you calm down, you lunatic. Wonder what's bothering you.
Mother Russia: I know. Tonight you die.
Colonel Stars and Stripes: [draws gun] Ladies first.
Mother Russia: You will not shoot me. You are super hero. You help people. You do not hurt them.
The Mother****er: That's super villain territory or as I like to call my little gang, The Toxic Mega-****s.
The Tumor: [waves] Hi.
Colonel Stars and Stripes: [takes gun; clicks, Mother Russia realizes it's empty] Yeah, just like your head.
Genghis Carnage: [Mother Russia overpowers Colonel, pulls out a machete and stabs him] Yeah!
The Tumor: Ooh, that's gotta hurt. [Mother Russia uses Colonel's coat to wipe his blood off her blade]
The Mother****er: I did my homework on you, Colonel. You used to be Sal Bertolinni, didn't you? Did a few jobs for my dad back in the day before you got born-again?
Colonel Stars and Stripes: [dying] I used to hangout with a lot of losers.
The Mother****er: Is this how you thought you would die, Sal? Dressed like an idiot?
Colonel Stars and Stripes: Who are you supposed to be?
The Mother****er: I'm the Mother ****er! And I'm here to end Kick-Ass. Not just kill him. I am going to shit on everything that he loved. Let's trash this place guys. [picks up mail statement]
The Mother****er: Miranda Swedlow. Who's that, Sal? She one of the whores on your team? [googles her name and matches her with her face on the poster]
The Mother****er: Night Bitch. All snuggled up to Kick-Ass. Looks like our boy's got a new hot pocket.
Mother Russia: Want me to kill his dog?
The Mother****er: The dog, Jesus Christ, I'm not that evil. Cut the old man's head off. You guys hungry? I'm starving. Let's go get some pizza.
Mother Russia: Don't worry, I kill you first. [wraps legs around Colonel's neck]
Colonel Stars and Stripes: Justice Forever... [snaps neck; dies]

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