Joan Clarke I know it's not ordinary. But who ever loved ordinary?
2nd most-quoted character in The Imitation Game (2014): in 8 of its 27 quotes
Most scenes with: Alan Turing (6), Hugh Alexander (3), Stewart Menzies (2)
No one normal could have done that. Do you know, this morning... I was on a train that went through a city that wouldn't exist if it wasn't for you. I bought a ticket from a man who would likely be dead if it wasn't for you. I read up on my work... a whole field of scientific inquiry that only exists because of you. Now, if you wish you could have been normal... I can promise you I do not. The world is an infinitely better place precisely because you weren't.
More lines from Joan Clarke
1 quote Joan Clarke Scenes with Joan Clarke
6 scenes
No, it takes me eight.
Joan Clarke You said to finish under six minutes.
[Alan, Hugh, Joan and Joan's friend, Helen, are having a conversation about workplace romance]
So who do you agree with? Alan or myself?
Helen Well, Alan, of course.
[stammering]
I'm very flattered really, but I... I don't think that... [Joan kicks him under the table]
Rubbish.
Helen Well, I work beside a man every day, and I can't help but have developed a bit of a crush on him.
Well, who is this man? So I can kick his arse.
Helen Oh, there's no need to worry, it's been chaste. We've never even met. He's a German.
Now I really want to kill him.
Helen Well, each of us intercepts messages from a specific German radio tower. So we have a counterpart on the other side, who's tip-tapping out the messages. Everyone types a touch differently, so you get to know the rhythm of your counterpart. It's strangely intimate. I feel as if I know him so well. It's a pity he has a girlfriend, but that's why I disagree with you, Mr. Alexander, because I'm in love with a coworker of sorts and we've never even met.
Well, allow me to buy you another pint and I'll tell you why you're wrong.
Helen Let's.
Excellent.
Joan Clarke [They get up and head to the bar. As they order, Alan sits completely silently, in a daze - having come to a realisation]
In case you were wondering, that's what flirting looks like.
Joan Clarke [slightly embarrassed, as his shout has drawn attention to them]
Alan!
Helen Yes, Alan?
Helen It's just a stupid joke. Don't worry about it.
No, no, no, no, no, tell me.
Helen Well, each of his messages begins with the same five letters. C-I-L-L-Y. So I suspect that Cilly must be the name of his amore.
[By this point, Joan, Peter Hilton and John Cairncross have begun to catch on]
But that's impossible. The Germans are instructed to use five random letters at the start of every message.
Helen Well, this bloke doesn't.
Love will make a man do strange things, I suppose.
In this case.... Love just lost Germany the whole bloody war!
[He rushes off, barging into Hugh and causing him to spill the pints he has just bought on Helen. John, Peter and Joan rush off after him and Hugh, realising what has happened, apologises and dashes off after them]
My God, you did it. You just defeated Nazism with a crossword puzzle.
There are five people in the world who know the position of every ship in the Atlantic. They are all in this room.
Joan Clarke Oh, good God.
Oh, I don't think even He has the power that we do right now.
Joan Clarke [getting closer to map]
No. There's going to be an attack on a British passenger convoy. Right there.
God, you're right. Those U-boats are only twenty, thirty minutes away.
Joan Clark
Civilians. Hundreds of them. We can save their lives.
And knock out a whole German fleet in the process.
I'll phone Denniston's office so that he can alert the Admiralty.
No.
Joan Clarke Do you think there's enough time to save them?
There should be. If we can get a message to that convoy—
No, no! [grabs and hangs up phone]
What the hell are you doing?
You-you can't call Denniston. You-you can't tell him about the attack.
What are you talking about?
We can have air support over that convoy in ten minutes.
Let the U-boats sink the convoy.
Look, it's been a big day, maybe you're suffering from—
Oh, shut up—
No!
Joan Clarke [Alan smashes the phone on the ground. Hugh punches him in the face, knocking him down]
Oh, Hugh! Hugh! Stop! That's enough!
Stop, Hugh!
Peter Hilton John, the attack is in minutes.
Joan Clarke [rushes to Alan's side]
Are you all right?
Yes, no, I'm fine, I'm fine. I'm fine. [to Hugh] Do you know why people like violence, Hugh? It's because it feels good. Sometimes we can't do what feels good. We have to do what is logical.
What's logical?
The hardest time to lie is when the other person is expecting to be lied to.
Joan Clarke [getting it]
Oh, God.
What?
If someone's waiting for a lie, you can't just, uh, give them one.
Joan Clarke Damn it, Alan's right.
Peter Hilton What?
What would the Germans think if we destroy their U-boats?
Peter Hilton Nothing. They'll be dead.
No. No, you can't be right.
So our convoy suddenly veers off course... a squadron of our air bombers miraculously descends on the coordinates of the U-boats... what will the Germans think?
The Germans will know that we have broken Enigma.
Joan Clarke They'll stop all radio communications by midday, and they'll have changed the design of Enigma by the weekend.
Yes.
Two years' work. Everything we've done here will all be for nothing.
There are 500 people in that convoy. Women. Children. We're about to let them die.
Our job isn't to save one passenger convoy, it is to win the war.
Our job was to crack Enigma.
Oh, we've done that. Now for the hard part. Keeping it a secret.
Peter Hilton Carlisle.
Joan Clarke What?
Peter Hilton [points to the map]
The convoy you're about to... it's, uh... The HMS Carlisle is one of the ships. We can't act on every piece of intelligence? So fine, we won't. Just this one.
Joan Clarke Peter, what's the matter with you?
Peter My brother's... well, he's on the Carlisle. A gunnery ensign.
I'm... I'm so sorry.
Peter Hilton Who the hell do you think you are? This is my brother. He's my big brother, alright, and you have a few minutes to call off his murder.
We can't.
He's right.
Peter Hilton Alan. Joan. Hugh. John. Please, I... the Germans, they won't get suspicious just because we stopped one attack. No one will know. I'm asking you. As your friend. Please.
I'm so sorry.
Peter Hilton You're not God, Alan. You don't get to decide who lives and who dies.
Yes, we do.
Peter Hilton Why?
Because no one else can.
[Alan and Joan meet with Menzies to tell him about keeping the decrypted Enigma intercepts secret]
Why are you telling me this?
We need your help, to keep this a secret from Admiralty, Army, RAF, uh...as no one can know, that we've broken Enigma, not even Dennison.
Who's in the process of having you fired.
Joan Clarke You can take care of that.
While we develop a system to help you determine how much intelligence to act on. Which, uh, attacks to stop, which to let through. Statistical analysis, the minimum number of actions it will take, for us to win the war - but the maximum number we can take before the Germans get suspicious.
And you're going to trust of this all to statistics, to maths?
Correct.
Joan Clarke And then MI6 can come up with the lies we will tell everyone else.
You'll need a believable alternative source for all the pieces of information that you use.
Joan Clarke A false story, so that we can explain how we got our information, that has nothing to do with Enigma, and then you can leak those stories to the Germans.
And then to our own military.
Maintain a conspiracy of lies at the very highest levels of government. [Lights a cigarette]...Sounds right up my alley.
I have something to tell you... [long pause] I'm a homosexual...
Joan Clarke [not surprised]
Alright.
No no, men Joan! Not women!
Joan Clarke So what? I had my suspicions. I always did. But we're not like other people. We love each other in our own way, and we can have the life together that we want. You won't be the perfect husband? I can promise you I harbored no intention of being the perfect wife. I'll not be fixing your lamb all day, while you come home from the office, will I? I'll work. You'll work. And we'll have each other's company. We'll have each other's minds. Sounds like a better marriage than most. Because I care for you. And you care for me. And we understand one another more than anyone else ever has.
...I don't.
Joan Clarke What?
Care for you. I never did. I just needed you to break Enigma. I've done that now, so you can go.
Joan Clarke [slaps him]
I am not going anywhere. I have spent entirely too much of my life worried about what you think of me, or what my parents think of me, or what the boys in Hut 8 or the girls in Hut 3 think, and you know I am done. This work is the most important thing I will ever do. And no one will stop me. Least of all you. [pause] You know what? They were right. Peter. Hugh. John. You really are a monster.
If you run the wires across the plugboard matrix diagonally, you'll eliminate rotor positions 500 times faster.
This is actually not an entirely terrible idea.
Joan Clarke That's Alan for "thank you."
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