I was sittin' flickin' chickens/ An' I was lookin' through the pickin's/ When suddenly these goys break down my walls/ I didn't even know them/ But they grab me by the scrotum/ And they started playin' Ping Pong with my balls/ Oy, the agony/ Ooh, the shame/ They make my privates public for a game?
More from History of the World: Part I
Monks Hey, Torquemada, whaddaya say?
Torquemada I just got back from the Auto de fé!
Monks Auto de fé? What's an Auto de fé?
Torquemada It's what you oughtn't to do, but you do anyway.
Monk Who knows, Torque, you might win a buck!
Torquemada How we doin', any converts today?
Guards Not a one, nay nay nay.
Torquemada We've flattened their fingers, we've branded their buns, nothing is working! Send in the nuns!
History of the World: Part I
All History of the World: Part I quotes →
All History of the World: Part I quotes →