[Hermione has run off from a Quidditch celebration party after seeing Ron kiss Lavender Brown. Harry finds her in a classroom with some birds flying around her.] [Tearfully]
Charms spell. I'm just practicing.
Well, they're really good. [sits down]
How does it feel, Harry? When you see Dean with Ginny? I know. I see the way you look at her. You're my best friend.
Lavender [Ron and Lavender come running in, laughing. Harry gives them a dirty look.]
Oops! I think this room's taken! [runs off]
[Hermione stands up angrily.]
Oppugno.
[Ron runs off and the birds chase him, crashing into the door. Ron leaves. Hermione sits down and starts to cry into Harry's shoulder.]
It feels like this.
Lavender [noticing Hermione at Ron's side in the Hospital Wing]
What's she doing here!?
I might ask you the same question!
Lavender I happen to be his girlfriend!
I happen to be his... friend.
Lavender Don't make me laugh. You haven't spoken in weeks! I suppose you want to make up now that he's suddenly all interesting!
He's been poisoned, you daft dimbo! And for the record, I've always found him interesting.
Lavender [Ron stirs]
Ah! See? He senses my presence. [leans down] Don't worry, Won-Won! I'm here. I'm here.
[croaks]
Uh... Hermione... Her... my... nee. Hermione...
[Hermione tenderly takes Ron's hand. Lavender runs out in tears. Awkward silence.] [jovially]
Oh, to be young and to feel love's keen sting. Well, come away everyone... Mr. Weasley is well tended.
[They all leave] [whispering to Harry]
About time, too. Don't you think?
[To Madam Pomfrey as she puts something on Ron's bedside table]
Thank you.
[noticing Harry's expression]
Oh, shut up.
[Harry leaves as Hermione continues to clutch Ron's hand and smiles tenderly at him.]
[McGonagall and Professors enter the Hospital Wing.]
Quick thinking on your part, Harry, using the bezoar. You must be very proud of your student, Horace.
I think we agree. Potter's actions were heroic. The question is: why were they necessary?
Why indeed? This appears to be a gift, Horace. You don't remember who gave you this bottle? By the way, possesses remarkably subtle hints of licorice and sherry, but not polluted with poison.
Actually, I had intended to give it as a gift myself.
Lavender [Lavender runs.] [runs into the hospital wing, after Ron's been poisoned]
Where is he?! Where's my Won-Won?! Has he been asking for me?! [sees Hermione next to Ron's bed] What's she doing here?!
I might ask you the same question.
Lavender I happen to be his girlfriend.
I happen to be his. [looks at Ron, then back] Friend.
Lavender Don't make me laugh. You haven't spoken in weeks. I suppose you want to make up with him now, nobody's suddenly all interesting.
He's been poisoned, you daft dimbo! And for the record, I've always found him interesting.
Lavender [Ron stirs]
Ah. See? He senses my presence. [leans down] Don't worry, Won-Won. I'm here. I'm here.
[croaks]
I missed her. Uh... Hermione... Her... my... nee. Hermione.
[Hermione tenderly takes Ron's hand. Lavender runs out in tears. Awkward silence] [Lavender runs away, crying.] [Lavender sobbing] [jovially]
Oh, to be young, and to feel love's keen sting. Well, come away everybody. Mr. Weasley is well tended.
