Hey, Ernest. How did it go?
It worked great. Victory is at hand. Now we have to move onto what I like to call "Plan B."
Mary What did you say?
His name is Santa Claus!
That's it. Yuck it up. He happens to be a close, personal friend of mine. Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah. Fifth graders think they know everything.
Santa Claus Why?
Call it... Uh, a fifth sense. Call it a flash of intermission, but I just got this feeling deep down in the heart of my bottom.
There's no such thing! Think about it: a guy who flies around the whole world in one night. It just doesn't quite correspond to the laws of time and travel.
Now, now, now, now, now, it's possible. You take the International Date Line, multiply it by the Time Zones, divided by the accelerated rotation of the earth... uh, carry the 1, and, uh, allowing for the Vernal Equinox on the Tropic of Cancer, he might just pull it off.
Santa Claus This is Ernest. I'm Santa Claus.
Uh, no. No, not - not really.
I'd better have a look.
Careful, now... them be "pisin"!
"Pisin" snakes! One minute, you be a strappin' young man like yerself, an' the next...