John McClane Yippee-ki-yay, mother****er.
Played by Bruce Willis 
Die Hard (1988) · 66 quotes
Die Hard (1988) · 66 quotes
Most-quoted character in Die Hard (1988): in 32 of its 66 quotes
Most scenes with: Hans Gruber (7)
Nine million terrorists in the world and I gotta kill one with feet smaller than my sister.
More lines from John McClane
14 quotes John McClane John McClane Drop it, dickhead!
John McClane [to himself]
Why the **** didn't you stop them, John? Because then you'd be dead, too, asshole!
John McClane [Recalling his wife's invitation as he crawls through a narrow ventilation shaft]
"Come out to the coast, we'll get together, have a few laughs...Now I know what a TV dinner feels like."
John McClane I got invited to the Christmas party by mistake. Who knew?
John McClane [About to jump off the edge of the roof with the fire hose tiedaround his waist]
I promise I will never even think about going up in a tall building again. Oh, God. Please don't let me die.
John McClane Take this under advisement, jerkweed.
John McClane [After he shoots Hans]
Happy trails, Hans.
John McClane [After he dumps the body of a terrorist on Sgt. Al Powell's police car]
Welcome to the party, pal.
John McClane [As he pushes a chair loaded with plastic explosives into the elevator shaft]
Geronimo, mother****er!
John McClane [tying a firehose around his waist]
Oh, John, what the **** are you doing? How the **** did you get into this shit?
John McClane [During the fight with Karl]
You should have heard your brother squeal when I broke his ****in' neck!
John McClane [Holding Karl in a headlock while beating him]
I'm gonna kill you, I'm gonna ****in' cook you, and I'm gonna ****in' eat you!
John McClane [in response to dispatch telling McClane that the line is reserved for emergency calls only]
"No **** shit, lady, does it sound like I'm ordering a pizza?"
Scenes with John McClane
17 scenes
Businessman You don't like flying, do you?
John What gives you that idea?
Businessman You want to know the secret to surviving air travel? After you get where you're going, take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on the rug bare foot and make fists with your toes.
John Fists with your toes?
Businessman I know, it sounds crazy. Trust me, I've been doing it for nine years. Yessir, better than a shower and a hot cup of coffee.
John Okay.
John [Businessman sees John's gun and reacts]
It's okay. I'm a cop. Trust me, I've been doing this for eleven years.
John You throw quite a party. I didn't realize they celebrated Christmas in Japan.
Joseph Takagi Hey, we're flexible. Pearl Harbor didn't work out so we got you with tape decks.
McClane Mayday, Mayday, Emergency anyone copy, Channel Nine, terrorists have seized the Nakatomi Building, Century City, I repeat, unknown number of terrorists, six or more armed with automatic weapons on the thirtieth floor of Nakatomi Plaza.
LAPD Operator
(To other operator)
I'll take this.
McClane Somebody answer me, goddamn it!
LAPD Operator
(Over Radio)
This freqency is reserved for emergency communications...
McClane No **** shit, lady! Do I sound like I'm ordering a pizza!?
I thought I told all of you, I want radio silence until further...
John Ooooh, I'm very sorry Hans. I didn't get that memo. Maybe you should've put it on the bulletin board. I figured since I've waxed Tony and Marco and his friend here, I figured you and Karl and Franco might be a little lonely, so I decided to give you a call.
Eh, that's... very kind of you, considering you are a mysterious party crasher. You are most troublesome, for a security guard.
John Bzzzt. Sorry Hans, wrong guess. Would you like to go for Double Jeopardy where the scores can really change?
Who are you then?
John Just a fly in the ointment, Hans. The monkey in the wrench. The pain in the ass.
Mr. Mystery Guest? Are you still there?
John Yeah, I'm still here. Unless you wanna open the front door for me.
Uh, no I'm afraid not. But you have me at a loss. You know my name but who are you? Just another American who saw too many movies as a child? Another orphan of a bankrupt culture who thinks he's John Wayne? Rambo? Marshall Dillon?
John Was always kinda' partial to Roy Rogers actually. I really dig those sequined shirts.
Do you really think you have a chance against us, Mister Cowboy?
John Yippee-ki-yay, mother****er.
This time John Wayne does not walk off into the sunset with Grace Kelly.
John That was Gary Cooper, asshole.
Attention, Cowboy. Attention. Or should I call you Mr. McClane? Mr. Officer John McClane of the New York Police Department?
John Sister Teresa called me Mr. McClane in the Third Grade. My friends call me John... and you're neither, shithead.
John Is the building on fire?
No, but it's gonna need a paint job and a shit load of screen doors.
You an American?
John Only if New Jersey counts.
I got a hundred people down here and they're all covered in glass.
John Glass? Who gives a shit about glass? Who the **** is this?
This is Deputy Chief Dwayne T. Robinson, and I am in charge here.
John Oh you're in charge? Well I got news for you *Dwayne*, from up here it doesn't look like you're in charge of jack shit.
You listen to me you little asshole—!
John Asshole? I'm not the one who just got butt-**** on national TV, Dwayne!
John Drop it, dickhead. It's the police.
Tony [calmly]
You're not going to hurt me.
John Oh, yeah? Why not?
Tony Because you're a policeman. There are rules for policemen.
John Yeah. That's what my captain keeps telling me.
John You would have made a pretty good cowboy yourself, Hans.
What was it you said to me earlier? "Yippie-kay-yay, mother****er."
John [Last lines]
Merry Christmas, Argyle.
Argyle Merry Christmas. [To himself] Man, if this is their idea of Christmas, I gotta be here for New Year's!
John McClane [calling the police on a radio taken from the terrorists]
Mayday, Mayday, emergency, anyone copy, channel nine. Terrorists have seized the Nakatomi Building, and are holding at least 30 people hostage. I repeat, unknown number of terrorists, six or more armed with automatic weapons at Nakatomi Plaza, Century City. Somebody answer me, Goddamn it!
First LAPD Operator
[to other operator]
It's the same address as that fire signal.
Second LAPD Operator
I'll take this. [to McClane] Attention, whoever you are: this frequency is reserved for emergency calls only.
John McClane No ****in' shit, lady! Do I sound like I'm orderin' a pizza?! They have already killed one hostage, they are fortifying their positions while you're jerkin' me off on a radio! Now send the police down ASAP...
Second LAPD Operator
[interrupting]
Sir, I've already told you: this is a reserved channel. If this is an emergency call, dial 911 on your telephone. Otherwise, I'll report this as an FCC violation.
John McClane Fine, report me! Come the **** down here and arrest me! Just send the police now!
Second LAPD Operator
[Karl shoots at him. The operators react with annoyed surprise on the other end when they hear the gunshots]
See if a black-and-white can drive by.
John McClane Yeah. But all things being equal, I'd rather be in Philadelphia. Chalk up two more bad guys.
Well, the boys down here will be glad to hear that. You know we got a pool going on you.
John McClane What kind of odds am I getting?
You don't wanna know.
John McClane Put me down for twenty, I'm good for it.
John McClane [over radio]
Powell? Yo, Powell, you got a minute?
I'm here, John.
John McClane Listen, man, I'm starting to get a bad feeling up here. I want you to do something for me. Um, I want you to find my wife, don't ask me how, by then, you'll know how. Uh, I want you to tell her something. I want you to tell her that... Tell her it took me a while to figure out... uh what a jerk I've been. But um... that... that when things started to pan out for her, I shoulda... been more supportive, and uh... and I just should've been behind her more. Oh, shit. Tell her that um... that she's the best thing that ever happened to a bum like me. She's heard me say, "I love you" a thousand times... she never heard me say, "I'm sorry." And I want you to tell her that Al. I want you to tell her that uh... John said that, "He was sorry." Okay? You got that, man?
Yeah, I got it, John. But you can tell her that yourself. You just watch your ass and you'll make it out of there, you hear me?
John McClane Well, I guess that's up to the man upstairs.
