[On Sam failing calculus]

I'm not angry. I'm disappointed.

Do you wanna hear my side of it?

Sam, how can there be two sides?

Hey, look, I got every question right on the final and the only reason why Mr. Spengler failed me was because I didn't write out the solutions.

Why not?

I do them in my head.

Did you tell him that?

I did. He didn't believe me. He said that if he can't do them in his head then I must be cheating.

Well, that's ridiculous! How can he fail you for being smarter than he is?

That's what I said.

You did? [Smirks] How'd he take it?

He flunked me, remember?