Fish: Fish Halman here, bringing you breaking on-the-scenes coverage of an explosion of mayhem, and lewd behavior that has swept the Long Beach area. Our viewers may remember a similar series of incidents which took place three months back involving this unidentified man. Police are now confirming that today's events are the work of that very same psychotic deviant. Ted Garcia is standing by in Hollywood Park with a live report. Take it away, Ted.
Ted: Thanks, Fish. I'm standing here with a group of people. Families, seniors, and degenerate gamblers that are shocked and traumatized by what they've witnessed here today when what started as a sunny, Southern California afternoon at the races turned, without warning, into a public, open-air porno.
Fish: Did you say porno, Ted?
Ted: Straight up, Fish. I'd like you to meet Glenda Lansing of Hawaiian Gardens. Glenda says she had an all-too up-close-and-personal encounter with the suspect just moments before the shocking incident occurred.
Glenda: That bastard had his filthy hands all over me.
Ted: Can you describe exactly what happened?
Glenda: I never saw a bastard who wanted it so bad. He put his filthy hands on every part of me.
Ted: Okay, that's a little too much information for this broadcast. Can you describe the man that assaulted you?
Glenda: He looked like that fella from the movies. The T-Bag.
Ted: T- Bag?
Glenda: You know, the Trainspotted fella? Built like a brick shit house.
Ted: All right, ma'am. You know that kind of language is not gonna fly on TV.
Glenda: That son of a bitch. He treated me like his hot little whore.
Ted: Thanks, Fish. I'm standing here with a group of people. Families, seniors, and degenerate gamblers that are shocked and traumatized by what they've witnessed here today when what started as a sunny, Southern California afternoon at the races turned, without warning, into a public, open-air porno.
Fish: Did you say porno, Ted?
Ted: Straight up, Fish. I'd like you to meet Glenda Lansing of Hawaiian Gardens. Glenda says she had an all-too up-close-and-personal encounter with the suspect just moments before the shocking incident occurred.
Glenda: That bastard had his filthy hands all over me.
Ted: Can you describe exactly what happened?
Glenda: I never saw a bastard who wanted it so bad. He put his filthy hands on every part of me.
Ted: Okay, that's a little too much information for this broadcast. Can you describe the man that assaulted you?
Glenda: He looked like that fella from the movies. The T-Bag.
Ted: T- Bag?
Glenda: You know, the Trainspotted fella? Built like a brick shit house.
Ted: All right, ma'am. You know that kind of language is not gonna fly on TV.
Glenda: That son of a bitch. He treated me like his hot little whore.
Fish : Fish Halman here, bringing you breaking on-the-scenes coverage of an explosion of mayhem, and lewd behavior that has swept the Long Beach area. Our viewers may remember a similar series of incidents which took place three months back involving this unidentified man. Police are now confirming that today's events are the work of that very same psychotic deviant. Ted Garcia is standing by in Hollywood Park with a live report. Take it away, Ted.
Ted : Thanks, Fish. I'm standing here with a group of people. Families, seniors, and degenerate gamblers that are shocked and traumatized by what they've witnessed here today when what started as a sunny, Southern California afternoon at the races turned, without warning, into a public, open-air porno.
Fish : Did you say porno, Ted?
Ted : Straight up, Fish. I'd like you to meet Glenda Lansing of Hawaiian Gardens. Glenda says she had an all-too up-close-and-personal encounter with the suspect just moments before the shocking incident occurred.
Glenda : That bastard had his filthy hands all over me.
Ted : Can you describe exactly what happened?
Glenda : I never saw a bastard who wanted it so bad. He put his filthy hands on every part of me.
Ted : Okay, that's a little too much information for this broadcast. Can you describe the man that assaulted you?
Glenda : He looked like that fella from the movies. The T-Bag.
Ted : T- Bag?
Glenda : You know, the Trainspotted fella? Built like a brick shit house.
Ted : All right, ma'am. You know that kind of language is not gonna fly on TV.
Glenda : That son of a bitch. He treated me like his hot little whore.
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