N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

Randal Graves: Since when is it a crime to say p***h m***ey?
Becky: Oh, since, I don't know, forever?!
Randal Graves: Why?
Dante Hicks: Because p***h m***ey is a racial slur against black people!
Randal Graves: No, it's not—**** is.
Dante Hicks: [horrified] Randal!
Elias: Did Mr. Randal just call Mr. Dante a ****?
Becky: Shut up, Elias!
Randal Graves: I didn't just call Dante a ****, I just said that **** is a racial slur.
Dante Hicks: So is p***h m***ey!
Randal Graves: Oh, it is not! C**n, sp**k, sp*de, m**lie, j***boo, n**-n*gthose are racial slurs. P***h m***ey is not.
Becky: I'm going to pretend that this conversation didn't happen. Elias, go pick up that ****ing mess. [points at Randal] And you are this close to getting shit-canned! Shoot me now! [storms off]
Dante Hicks: What are you doing? Are you trying to get fired?
Randal Graves: Since when did p***h m***ey become a racial slur?
Dante Hicks: When ignorant racists started using it 100 years ago!
Randal Graves: Oh, bullshit. My grandmother used to call me a p***h m***ey all the time when I was a kid because I'd sit on the porch and stare at my neighbors.
Dante Hicks: Despite the fact that your grandmother used it as a term of endearment for you, it's still a racial slur. It would be like your grandmother calling you a little ****.
Randal Graves: Oh, it is not. Besides, my grandmother had nothing but the utmost respect for the Jewish community. She used to tell me to always be nice to the Jewish kids, or they'd put the sh***ie curse on me.
Dante Hicks: WHAT THE ****, MAN?!
Randal Graves: What?
Dante hicks: Sh***ie is a racial slur, too!
Randal Graves: Oh, it is not!
Dante Hicks: Yes, it is!
Randal Graves: Well, she never called any Jews sh***ies, she just said "sh***ie curse" a lot. It was cute.
Dante Hicks: It wasn't cute, it was racist!
Randal Graves: I disagree, man. She was just an old-timer. That's the way people talked back then. It didn't mean they were racists. [thinks for a moment] But my grandmother did refer to a broken beer bottle once as a **** knife.
[Dante is flabbergasted]
Randal Graves: You know, come to think of it, my grandmother was kind of a racist.
Dante Hicks: You think?!
Randal Graves: Well, I still don't think that p***h m***ey should be considered a racial term. I've always used it to describe lazy people, not lazy black people. I think if we really tried, we could take back porch monkey and save it.
Dante Hicks: [fed up] It can't be saved, Randal. The sole purpose for its creation, the only reason it exists in the first place, is to disparage an entire race. And even if it could be saved, you couldn't save it because you're not black!
Randal Graves: Well, listen to you--telling me I can't do something because of the color of my skin. You're the racist, man!

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