John Parker There is little time! You better come quickly, if your planet is still important to you!
Tied for 4th most-quoted character in Buckaroo Banzai (1984): in 6 of its 69 quotes
Most scenes with: Buckaroo Banzai (3)
Excuse me, Mr. President. Time is short. In order to prevent John Whorfin's escape, my comrades are at this moment takin' up a geostationary position over New Jersey. De situation is explosive!
More lines from John Parker
2 quotes John Parker John Parker Hellooo, Mr. Secretary! {finger flex}
Scenes with John Parker
3 scenes
[to a doctor witnessing Dr. Banzai performing brain surgery]
Dr. Banzai is using a laser to vaporize the pineal tumor without damaging the quadrigeminal plate. Subcutaneous microphones are gonna allow the patient to transmit verbal instructions to his own brain.
Doctor
Like, "Raise my right arm"?
Or "Throw the harpoon". People are gonna come from all over. This boy's an Eskimo.
You ever thought about joining me full-time?
Uh huh. Can you sing?
A little. Yeah. I can dance...
Artie Duncan I don't care if you walked through a mountain in Texas. This is New Jersey, and when you play my... [distracted by someone walking past him] ...when you play my joint, you're just another act. I want some music out'a you characters!
Reno Nevada You want it, Artie? You got it.
Scooter Lindley Dad! Dad! Buckaroo's in trouble!
Casper Lindley Say what?!
Perfect Tommy Don't embarrass us.
Have I ever?
[about the thermo-pod] Buckaroo Banzai: It flies like a truck.
John Parker Good. [pause] What is a truck?
[as the thermo-pod is in free-fall] Buckaroo Banzai:: Can't you fly this thing?
John Parker I'm a diplomat! I failed flight school!
General Catburd Mr. President, I am a soldier. And I'm a damn good one. I've got enough decorations to snap a Christmas tree. All I'm trying to say is, and I hope I speak for everyone in this room, is that I am scared. I'm barely holding my... fudge, right now.
Senator Cunningham [A Woman]
Stop acting like a goddamn schoolgirl, General, and pull yourself together!
I'm glad someone has the balls to face facts!
Where are we?
I'd hate to tell you.
[New Jersey and Reno are sneaking through the lab when New Jersey notices a watermelon held in a pneumatic compression device]
Why is there a watermelon there ?
Reno Nevada I'll tell you later.
Scooter Lindley [holding a Ruger Mini-14 semi-automatic rifle]
Get away from that car, or I'll drink your blood!
Secretary of Defense [nervously]
Whatcha got there, son? That's not... real, is it?
Scooter Lindley [Scooter Lindley fires a round at the ceiling. The Secretary of Defense jumps back.]
Get 'em up!
Full speed ahead! And may I remind you, to fasten your-a seat belts, and esstinguish all smoking material.
We haven't a CHANCE! Your overthruster's for SHIT! We'll lose...
One more WORD out of you, Bigbooty...
John Bigbote
[screaming]
BIG-BOO-TAY! TAY! TAY!
Mission Control Operator [Lord John Whorfin shoots him]
Buckaroo, the White House wants to know is everything OK with the alien space craft from Planet 10 or should we just go ahead and destroy Russia?
Tell him yes on one and no on two.
Mission Control Operator Which one was yes, go ahead and destroy Russia... or number 2?
John Parker, take this wheel. Just... just hold on, that's good. It flies like a truck.
John Parker Good. {pause} What is a truck?
{as the thermopod is in free-fall} Can't you fly this thing?
John Parker I'm a diplomat! I failed flight school!
