Batman quotes from Batman: The Killing Joke (2016)

Batman

I've been thinking lately about you. You and me. About how this is going to end. About who will end up killing who. Perhaps you'll kill me, perhaps I'll kill you. Perhaps sooner, perhaps later. You know that, don't you? I just... I need to know, for when that time comes... that I've made a genuine attempt to talk things over. To try and avert the inevitable. Just once. [grabs "Joker"'s hand] Listen to me! This is life and death - mine or yours. Our relationship, it's fatal! And I don't want your murder on my-- ["Joker" pulls his hand back, leaving white powder on Batman's glove, and Batman realizes it is a decoy]

Batman

I spoke with Commissioner Gordon before I came in here. He told me he wanted this done by the book. You know what that means? It means that despite all your sick, cruel, vicious little games, he's as sane as he ever was. So ordinary people don't crack. Maybe... it's just you.

She'll never walk again. I'm sorry.

Some woman found Miss Gordon, name of Colleen Miles. She found the, uh... victim in a state of undress.

Batman

Undress?

They didn't tell you? Pretty sick, ain't it?

Batman

Leave us alone for a moment. [Bullock stands and steps outside] Barbara... I don't know if you can hear me.

Batman...? Batman... [Batman leans closer] They took Dad. He... oh, God... I remember!

Batman

Barbara, take it easy. It's okay.

No, no, it's not okay! He's taking it to the limit this time. Y-you didn't see his eyes. He said he wanted to... to prove a point! He said Dad was "top of the bill"! What's he gonna do? What's he gonna do to my father?!

I don't know where he is, I swear to God!

Batman

Swear to ME!

The Joker

Let me ask you something: What does it matter if you send me back to the Asylum if it doesn't matter to me? I've proven my point. Gordon's been driven mad. I've demonstrated there's no difference between me and everyone else. All it takes is one bad day. That's how far the world is from where I am, just one bad day. You had a bad day once, am I right? Oh, I know I am. I can tell. You had a bad day, and everything changed.

The Joker

Dressing up like a flying rat doesn't hide it, it SCREAMS it! [Joker's minions appear in the mirror panels dressed as Batman; Batman punches the mirrors] You had a bad day, and it drove you as crazy as everybody else, only you won't ADMIT it! [a trap door opens under Batman's feet, nearly dropping him into a pit of spikes] You have to keep pretending that this makes sense, that there's some point to all this struggling! You make me wanna puke!

The Joker

I mean, what IS it with you? What made you what you are? Girlfriend killed by the mob, maybe? Brother carved up by some mugger? Something like that, I know! Because something like that... happened to ME.

The Joker

Sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another. If I'm going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice. My point is...

The Joker

I went crazy. And I'm smart enough to admit it! [tears down a chair bolted to the "ceiling" and smashes it over Batman's head] Why can't you?! [kicks Batman in the face] By clinging to reality, you're denying the reality of the situation! [begins hurling dishes, then cracks Batman in the head with a frying pan] I mean, do you ever think about how many times we've come close to World War III over a flock of geese on a computer screen?! [hits Batman with the frying pan again, then begins kicking him] Silly goose, it's all a joke! Everything anybody's ever valued or struggled for... it's MONSTROUS! Why can't you see the funny side?! WHY AREN'T YOU LAUGHING?!

Batman

Because I've heard it before... and it wasn't funny the first time.

The Joker

God damn it... [throws the gun away] Well, what are you waiting for? Kick the hell out of me, and get your standing ovation! [brief silence; Batman does nothing] Come on!

Batman

No. Not this time. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want either of us to end up killing the other. But we're running out of alternatives. Perhaps it all hinges on tonight. I don't know what it was that bent your life out of shape, but maybe, I've been there, too. Maybe we could work together. I could rehabilitate you. You don't need to be alone. We don't have to kill each other. [holds out his hand] Let me help you.

The Joker

I'm sorry, but... no. No. It's far too late for that. [turns away from Batman...then begins to chuckle as the rain begins to fall] You know, it's funny. This reminds me of a joke. See, there were two guys locked in a lunatic asylum and one night... one night, they decided they didn't like that anymore. They decided to escape. So, they made it up to the roof and there, just across this narrow gap, they see rooftops stretching across town, stretching to FREEDOM. Now, the first guy, he jumps right across, no problem. But his friend, oh-ho, no way, he's afraid of falling. So, the first guy, he has an idea. He says, "Hey! I got this flashlight with me. I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings and you can walk across the beam and join me." But the second guy says, "What do you think I am, crazy? You'll just turn it off when I'm halfway across!" [begins to laugh] Oh, excuse me... [continues laughing; after a moment, Batman slowly smiles and joins him for the laugh]
[Batman and Joker just stand there laughing their heads off, as the camera begins a slow, deliberate pan down to a puddle near the two’s feet, Joker abruptly stops laughing and falls completely silent. Batman, however, does not stop. The screen slowly fades to pitch black, but Batman's unsettling laughter rings out, gradually fading away into the silence as the credits begin to roll.]