Most-quoted character in Bad Boys II (2003): in 43 of its 64 quotes
Most scenes with: Marcus Burnett (25), Detective Mateo Reyes (3), Capt. Howard (2)
We ride together, we die together. Bad boys for life.
Now that's how you supposed to shoot, from now on that's how you shoot! Oh man, I want my next partner to shoot like that WOOOOO... it takes a dysfunctional mother****er to bust somebody in the head like that. That's some disfunctional shit! My next partner's gonna invite me to his barbeques and shit, though.
Dan Marino should definitely buy this car. Well not this one, cause I'm gonna **** this one up. But he should get one just like it.
It ain't exactly a pool, man. It's like a big-ass puddle wrapped in blue plastic.
That's that bullshit.
Change the station... more music less Marcus. If you open the door he'll be a black Dr. Phil for the next 40 minutes.
Now show 'em your badge!
Ok look, we're a partnership, but we're a partnership with boundaries. We got a new rule. From now on you can't say the word flaccid to me. This is our little ?boundary box?. We're gonna take the word flaccid and put it in there with my mom's titties and your erection problem and we gonna close this box and we gonna throw this bitch in the ocean. And the only way that you can get to this box is you gotta be mother****in' Jacques Cousteau.
A bullet in the head will really mess up your extensions!
See, that's that new spiritual shit my partner's on. Me? I actually prefer shooting mother****ers.
Casper drop the bag [pointing his gun at a KKK member]
I think i done just got mad.
Calm down I'm calm I'm calm whoa hey WHOA WHOA I am way to unstable for that bullshit stop all the god damn movement everybody STOP MOVING
You a virgin?
Reggie Yes, sir.
Good. Keep it that way. Ain't gonna be no **** tonight.
You ever made love to a man?
Reggie No.
You want to?
Bad boys, bad boys what ya gonna do? What ya gonna do when we come for you?
Dude, you gotta learn the words.
We usually only do the chorus.
What my partner means is that these are a special breed called umm...
Big mother****ers.
"Have you ingested X? Look at your pupils.
Look at my pupils? How the hell am I gonna look at my pupils?
[tries to cross his eyes]
You see that?
They throwin' cars. How'd I not see that.
Hey, Mike, I'm just trying to be helpful.
Hey, you'd know what would be ****in' helpful, Marcus? Just shut the **** up and let me drive, let's try that.
Crash the ambulance into the mortuary now.
I'm gonna whoop your asses if you don't crash that ambulance into the mortuary now.
Captain, is it possible we can discuss potential reimbursement...
The department doesn't cover personal property, that's why we drive police cars.
You want to talk? All right, go ahead, go ahead.
We're not immigration!
They can't hear you 'coz they still shootin' at you.
Look, Mike. Calm down!
Calm down? I'm calm. I'm calm. Whoaa! Whoa! I am way too unstable for that bullshit! Stop all the goddamn movement! Everybody stop moving.
It's a donut. It's a medical thing. I got it from a maternity store. You know, a lot of pregnant women use it. They can put one cheek here and take the pressure off the other. For you, dawg.
Thoughtful.
****, who is it at the door?
It's Reggie!
Who the **** is Reggie?
Came to take Megan out.
What you want, ****?
Reggie I'm here... to take his daughter out.
Mother****er, I heard the boy say your name Reggie? You wanna be takin' Megan out?
Reggie Yes, sire?
How old is you?
Reggie Fifteen.
Shit, ****. You at least thirty.
Police! Pull over! Stop the car!
Not your badge, man! He has a gun, shoot him!
Rodney, I hear there's a boat on fire off the coast of Cuba.
Don't you think we oughta break international waters to help them out?
That's my DAWG.
Mike, have some dignity!
What? I ain't doin' nothin'. What am I gonna do with these big-ass fake dead titties?
But you're LOOKIN' at them.
There is something seriously wrong with your brain man
Just cover up 'em titties.
Hey, man, I like lookin' good, that's all.
For who?
Hey man, don't hate the playa, hate the game.
Hate the tailor.
We got a tip that the Zopehounders were gonna do a hit on cash or drugs from this big time X-man.
That's what they call an ecstasy dealer on the streets.
Marcus, I know what they call them. That's why I'm Captain.
Hey look, man, can you tell me who was driving the black Suburban? Huh? Oh he don't know nothin'. His brains is under the end table.
He can't tell us shit, Mike. He's all **** up.
What's your point?
My point is that dead suspects can't say shit.
My ass stills hurts from what you did to it the other night.
Hey, it got rough. We got caught up in the moment, shit got crazy. You know how I get.
When you popped me from behind I think you damaged some nerves.
Blond Dread Who that? Who in MY HOUSE?
I'm the Devil! Who's asking?
Blond Dread The Devil... is not welcome... HEEEEEERRE!
''Marcus Burnett''; You gotta call yo self the devil in his house?...shit
Who shot you in the ass?
Who? That "who" would be you.
Me? I shot you? I mean, I'm not saying I didn't shoot you. I did a lot of shooting. But I ain't saying I shot you in the ass...
But damn! Somebody shot you in the ass!
Tell me about it.
Vargas, we're not gonna make it to the tunnel! Go to Plan B! We're going to Plan B!
What Plan B?
Man, you don't pay attention to SHIT, do you?
Syd Are you **** shitting me? LET'S GO!
Is this still plan B?
Naw, this is definitely plan C!
Man, Plan B does not have that big-ass gun in it!
You call this Plan B? What does Plan B stand for? Bullshit!
Look, do you want to drive?
Yeah, pull over by those mother****ers with the MACHINE GUN!
Hey, isn't it low tide?
Yes, I think it is.
Don't you have some relatives that you need to go pick up?
You went too far on that one.
You know, unlike you my daddy didn't leave me no trust fund. I got real world shit to deal with, Mike. I'm not in it for the thrills.
Same old shit, different day. All right, damn, yes i shot you, all right. But you'be seeing nothing at all if i hadn't made my move. So i don't why you're acting so angry about it.
You're misinformed, i'm not angry.
Oh, you're very angry.
No, i'm not angry.
[Cutaway to Marcus' therapy session] Therapist You are angry. It's okay.
I'm not angry. Except when you keep repeating "You're angry". Now that shit's **** annoying. Like a **** gnat at a barberque. Just bugging the **** outta me.
Therapist Good. I want you to say: "I'm angry. It's okay. I'll process my anger. I love myself. Whoosah.
I don't know what the **** you're talking about.
Therapist Yes, you do know what the **** i'm talking about.
What... what the... what are you doing, man.
My bad.
Shoot outside. Pay attention to what you're doing.
So sad.
What's so sad?
Your untreated control issues. It's not your fault.
What in the hell that's suppose to mean?
Your mama probably refused you her tit when you were a baby. You grew up a malnourished high school softie. Got you a gun, a little tight t-shirt and became an overcompensating tough guy.
That is the last time you will ever refer to my mother's titties. I don't even want them up in your head.
Blue power, mother****ers! Miami PD!
Aw, damn. It's the Negroes!
Bad boys, bad boys/What ya gonna do?/What ya gonna do when we come for you?
Dude, you gotta learn the words.
We usually only do the chorus.
You want to talk?! All right, go ahead, go ahead.
We're not Immigration!
They can't hear you 'cause they still shootin' at you! [Gunfire continues]
**** Haitians in a **** little-ass room with **** guns! Shit!
Look here. This is our little boundary box. So we gonna take the word flaccid and we're gonna put it in there with my mom's titties with your erection problems, and we're gonna close this box and we're gonna throw this bitch in the ocean. And the only way that you can get to this box is you got to be mother**** Jacques Cousteau. We cool? [Suddenly realizes that they're now being watched all the while by store customers] Oh shit. We gotta go.
In front of my babies, you got porno and homo shows up in here?! What kinda freak-ass store is this?! [Sees Lowery and Burnett as they leave] And you two mother****ers need Jesus! [To children] Cover your ears, baby.
