The Awful Truth quotes

View Quote And then somehow, all of a sudden, the three of us were having lunch together. The man, and Mr. Smith [their dog], and I. And then things began to happen rather swiftly. And finally I said, well I think we'd better get married. And we did. And that way, we were able to give Mr. Smith a better home and live happily ever after. Until now.

View Quote Lucy: [about Daniel] He's sweet and thoughtful...sane and considerate. I was married to one who was insane and inconsiderate.
Aunt Patsy: I didn't expect you to get silly about him...It's fine except the rebound is rarely the real thing. As a matter of fact, it's the bunk.
Lucy: Well, I'm serious about Daniel and I like him. I like him very much. I'm all through with Jerry. He doesn't mean a thing to me. I don't love him, and what's more, I probably never did. I'm sure I never loved him and now I hate him. And that surprises you, doesn't it? I hate Jerry Warriner and I like Daniel Leeson very very much and I hope he's just crazy about me because I think he's the finest man I ever met.

View Quote I've gotta get a deep Florida tan if it takes all afternoon...All aboard for Miami, Palm Beach and points south.

View Quote [to Barbara] You can't have a happy married life if you're always suspicious. No. There can't be any doubts in marriage. Marriage is based on faith and if you've lost that, you've lost everything.

View Quote [about Jerry] I'm convinced he must care about me or he wouldn't do the funny things he does.

View Quote Jerry: This is my day to visit Mr. Smith.
Lucy: He's only my husband for - how much longer is it now? Sixty days?
Jerry: Fifty-nine.
Lucy: Oh, that's better. Only fifty-nine days. Don't worry about him, he has a Continental mind.
Daniel: [They shake hands] I'm glad to know ya.
Jerry: How can you be glad to know me? I know how I'd feel if I was sitting with a girl and her husband walked in.
Lucy: I'll bet you do.
Jerry: [To Lucy] You know, I don't think you ought to go around telling people you're not married. He looks like a nice sort of fella. How do you think he feels?
Lucy: Why don't you go and play with the dog?
Jerry: Don't mind me.
Lucy: [to Daniel] Tell me some more about Arizona.
Daniel: Oklahoma.

View Quote I was working my head off at the Virginia Club but the minute he started doing better, you know what I mean, why he made me give up my job and, uhm, take a trip to London and Paris and uh, I think that was pretty swell, don't you?...it was a little act, kind of uh, well, it's a little hard to explain.

View Quote Perhaps our marriage doesn't mean anything to you?...Perhaps you have no sentiment left for me.

View Quote [to Jerry, about Barbara] Tell her I'd love to meet her. Tell her to wear boxing gloves.

View Quote Jerry: You just thought that if I'd stay up there, you'd show me exactly how innocent a night in the country could be, didn't you?
Lucy: Are you still harping on that same old string? Well, it's a matter of complete indifference to me whether you go or stay. I was just trying to make it easier for you, that's all.

View Quote [to Mrs. Leeson] Well, I guess a man's best friend is his mother. I certainly learned about women from you.

View Quote What in the world was Dad ever doing with a football?...Of course I remember. Pop loved Princeton. He was there nearly twenty years. If ever a man loved a place, he did - he just adored it. And he certainly kept it looking beautiful. You've seen the grounds, of course?

View Quote Well, I'm gonna be tanned and Lucy's not gonna be embarrassed. And what wives don't know won't hurt them.

View Quote [to Barbara] I've seen your pictures in the paper and I've wondered what you look like.

View Quote [to Lucy] I certainly acted like a prized lunatic and I'm sorry...Nothing except the most ridiculous and sickening exhibition mortal man ever made of himself. Oh, I don't know why I act like that....The main idea is, do you accept my apology? Aside from making a blue-ribbon sap of myself today, I must have embarrassed you beyond words. You took it fine, though.