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Hackenbush: Record department. Col. Hawkins talkin'.
Whitmore: Col. Hawkins, did you get a wire for me regarding Dr. Hackenbush?
Hackenbush: [turns on a fan and blows a paper against it] I'm sorry sir. There's a hurricane blowin' down here, and you have to talk a little louder. Woo! It's certainly the windiest day we ever had! WOO! Certainly is windy!
Whitmore: I want to find out about Dr. HACKENBUSH! (Hackenbush calls him on the intercom, pulling him away from the phone) Yes?
Hackenbush: Whitmore you'll have to cut out that squawking! The patients are all complaining! [on the phone, posing as Colonel Hawkins]...I hope, sir, that's the information that you require.
Whitmore: I'm sorry, Colonel. I didn't hear it. I was called to the dictagraph.
Hackenbush: What was that you said sir?
Whitmore: [loudly] I was called to the dictagraph!
[Hackenbush turns on the intercom again] Hackenbush:: Whitmore, one more yelp outta you and I'll have you bounced out of here! (on the phone)...And I trust, sir, that that answers your question.
Whitmore: I'm sorry, Colonel, I didn't hear you!
Hackenbush: I can't hear you, you will have to talk a little louder.
Whitmore: I want to find out something about Hackenbush! (Hackenbush calls him on the intercom again) Well, what is it now?!
Hackenbush: Whitmore, that's the last time I'm gonna warn you about that yowling! (on the phone) And in conclusion, let me say…
Whitmore: I'm sorry Colonel. What was that you said about Hackenbush?
Hackenbush: Hack- you mean, Dr. Hackenbush? Oh, no, he's not here.
Whitmore: (with mounting impatience) I know he's not there. He's here!
Hackenbush: Then what are you botherin' me for, Yankee?
Whitmore: But I want to know something about his Florida record-
Hackenbush: (in a female telephone operator's voice) Here's your Florida call, Mr. Whitmore-
Whitmmore: Operator, will you get off the line! Hello, hello, Colonel?
Hackenbush: Yes?
Whitmore: Are you sure you're speaking about Hugo Z. Hackenbush?
Hackenbush: Who?
Whitmore: Hugo Z. Hackenbush!
Hackenbush: Who's calling him?
Whitmore: (barely controlling his temper)...The Standish Sanitarium.
Hackenbush: Yeah! That's where he works! Say, I understand he's doing a mighty fine job up there.
Whitmore: I... I want to get some information regarding his qualifications for the job.
Hackenbush: What job?
Whitmore: As head of the sanitarium!
Hackenbush: Who?
Whitmore: Hackenbush!
Hackenbush: [on the intercom] Whitmore, are you calling me?
Whitmore: No, you sap! (picks up the phone)... Hello.
Hackenbush: Yes, now, uh, now what was that name?
Whitmore: Hackenbush. HACK-EN-BUSH!
Hackenbush: Uh-huh. Well, as soon as he comes in, I'll have him get in touch with you.
Whitmore: [slamming down the phone] No!


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