Wayne's World quotes

View Quote Terry: I love you, man.
Russell: And I love you. Because I've learned that platonic love can exist between two grown men.
Benjamin Kane: And I've learned something, too. I've learned that a flawless profile, a perfect body, the right clothes, and a great car can get you far in America, almost to the top, but it can't get you everything.

View Quote [Wayne and Garth discuss Claudia Schiffer.]
Wayne Campbell: She's a babe.
Garth Algar: She's magically babe-a-licious.
Wayne: She tested very high on the stroke-ability scale.
...
Garth: Hey, are you done yet? I'm getting tired of holding this. (referring to Claudia's picture)
Wayne: Yeah, that's what she said.

View Quote Garth Algar: Uh, Wayne?
Wayne Campbell: Yeah?
Garth: Do you ever get the feeling Benjamin's not one of us?
Wayne: Good call. It's like he wants us to be liked by everyone. I mean, Led Zeppelin didn't write tunes everybody liked. They left that to the Bee Gees.

View Quote Terry: Wayne. Wayne. Garth told me about the show, man. I love you, man.
Wayne Campbell: Yeah, and I love you too, Terry.
Terry: No-no-no, I mean it, man. I LOVE you.
Wayne: No, I-I mean it. I love you.
Terry: No you don't, man. I love you.
Wayne: (being hugged by Terry) Garth. Hey, come over here, I think Terry has something he wants to say to you.
Terry: I love you, man.
Garth Algar (casually): Thank you. (continues dancing)

View Quote Benjamin Kane: Do you have a lawyer?
Wayne Campbell: Yes. Ahm... no. We're between lawyers right now. You see, our first lawyer screwed our affairs so bad.
Garth Algar: That's right. I walked right to that office — that's what I did — and I reached across that desk and I grabbed him by his fat head and I said "Listen, man. I'm not going to jail for YOU or for anybody!

View Quote Mikita's Manager, Glen: Anything wrong, Davy?
Davy: Yeah, I got paid today.
Glen: Yeah, I know what that's like.
Davy: No. You don't understand. They laid me off. I got one of these. (holds up pink slip)
Glen: Yeah, I know how that feels.
Davy: Know what I'd like to do?
Glen: Yeah, I know what you'd like to do. You'd like to find the guy who did it, rip his still-beating heart out of his chest and hold it in front of his face so he can see how black it is before he dies.
Davy: Actually, I was thinking of filing a grievance with the union.
Glen: Well, the world's a twisted place.

View Quote Wayne Campbell: Am I supposed to be a man, am I supposed to say it's okay, I don't mind? I don't mind. Well, I mind! I mind big-time! And you know what the worst part is? I NEVER LEARNED TO READ. (Splashing water on his face to simulate tears)
Cassandra: Is that true?
Wayne Campbell: Yes, everything except the reading part.

View Quote Wayne's World, Wayne's World, party time, excellent!

View Quote (To scary ex-girlfriend after she gives him a gun rack as an "anniversary" gift) A gun rack... a gun rack. Shyeah, Right! I don't even own a gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack. What am I gonna do... with a gun rack?

View Quote (reading from Benjamin's planner) 'Thursday — purchase feeble cable access show, and exploit it.' Gee, I feel sorry for whoever THAT is.

View Quote That bass player's a babe. She makes me feel kinda funny, like when we used to climb the rope in gym class.

View Quote Garth Algar: Hey, Mister Donut-head Man, who's trying to kill you?
Garth [as Mr. Donut-head Man]: I don't know, but he better not!

View Quote (admiring a 64' Pre-CBS Fender Stratocaster in a music store) It will be mine. Oh, yes — It will be mine.

View Quote Pardon me — do you have any Grey Poupon?

View Quote (after being told not to play "Stairway to Heaven" at the guitar store.) No stairway? Denied!