Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby quotes

View Quote Reese: Look, all I got to my name is a car, and a duffel bag full of underwear and sweet, stinky weed.
Walker: How much you sellin' that weed for, old man?

View Quote Lucius: I don't wanna rain on your parade, but that was some of the dumbest driving I have ever seen in my life.
Ricky: Thank you.
Lucius: Now, I know you won the race, but you're not gonna live forever.
Ricky: Oh, I'm not stupid, Lucius. No one lives forever. No one. But with advances in modern science, and my high level of income, I mean, it's not crazy to think I can't live to be 245, maybe 300.

View Quote Mr. Dennit: Ricky, your little obscene gesture is going to cost you 100 points. Do you know how much that costs us in sponsorship dollars?
Ricky: With all due respect, Mr. Dennit, I had no idea you'd gotten experimental surgery to have your balls removed.
Mr. Dennit: What did you just say to me?
Ricky: What? I said it with all due respect!
Mr. Dennit: Just because you say that doesn't mean you get to say whatever you want to me!
Ricky: Yes, it does!
Mr. Dennit: No, it doesn't!
Ricky: It's in the Geneva Conventions, look it up!

View Quote Help me, Oprah Winfrey!

View Quote I'm Ricky Bobby. If you don't chew Big Red, then **** you.

View Quote I sent in my application to The Real World, so I'm hoping to hear back from that. I'm putting a lot of my eggs into that basket, the MTV basket. I'm also thinking about getting a gun, and dealing crack. Being a crack dealer. Not, like, a mean crack dealer, but like... like a nice one. Kinda friendly, like, "Hey, what's up guys? You want some crack?". I'm just waiting on those two things to just kinda flesh themselves out.

View Quote Dear Lord Baby Jesus, we also like to thank you for my wife's father Chip, we hope that you can use your baby Jesus powers to heal him and his horrible leg. It smells terrible and the dogs are always bothering with it.

View Quote Look, I like the Christmas Jesus best, and I'm sayin' grace. When you say grace, you can say it to Grownup Jesus or Teenage Jesus or Bearded Jesus or whoever you want.

View Quote Dear Tiny Jesus, in your golden fleece diapers with your tiny, little fat balled up fists

View Quote Dear Eight Pound, Six Ounce, Newborn Baby Jesus, don't even know a word yet, just a little infant, so cuddly, but still omnipotent. We'd just like to thank you for all the races 've won and the $21.2 million, LOVE THAT MONEY! That I have accrued over this past season. Also due to a binding endorsement contract that stipulates I mention PowerAde at each grace, I just wanna say that PowerAde is delicious and it cools you off on a hot summer day and we look forward to PowerAde's release of mystic mountain blueberry. Thank you, for all your power and your grace, Dear Baby God, Amen

View Quote Hang on, Baby Jesus, this is gon' get bumpy!

View Quote Hey losing is never fun but here's a little something to keep your spirits up.... (flips bird) its real nice... got it at Target.... It's on sale.

View Quote [driving his first race] Hey, Lucius, I just wanted to share a piece of personal information with you. I've got a...a chubby right now because THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST AWESOME EXPERIENCES OF MY LIFE!! I'M GETTIN' TO DRIVE A RACECAR I CAN'T BELIEVE IT OH MY GOD!!!

View Quote The room is startin' to spin real fast...cause of...cause of gayness.

View Quote Mr. Dennit, with all due respect... I had no idea that you had an experimental surgery to have your balls removed.