Spaceballs quotes

81 total quotes

Multiple Characters
Notes
Opening credits
President Skroob

View Quote King Roland: I'm breathing! Air! Air!!

View Quote Dot Matrix: [to Barf on the ladder behind her] Hey! Stop looking up my can!

View Quote [After discovering that most of his ship's crew consists of members of the same Asshole family] I knew it! I'm surrounded by Assholes!(Pulls down his helmet) Keep firing, Assholes!

View Quote Computer: This is your last chance to push the cancellation button.
Skroob: Cancellation button? Hurry!
Dark Helmet: Where is it? Where is it?
Colonel Sandurz: It's gotta be here!
[They open a housing, where the button has an "Out of Order" tag on it.]
Dark Helmet: "Out of order!?" ****! Even in the future nothing works!

View Quote Why didn't anyone tell me my ass was so big?!

View Quote [aiming his Schwartz ring at Lone Starr's crotch] Say goodbye to your two best friends, and I don't mean your pals in the Winnebago.

View Quote I told you never to call me on this wall! This is an unlisted wall!

View Quote [choking and gagging; pulls up mask] I can't breathe in this thing!

View Quote Come back here, you fat bearded bitch!

View Quote Sandurz, Sandurz! You got to help me! I don't know what to do. I can't make decisions! I'm a president!

View Quote Yogurt! Yogurt! [referring to the character] I hate Yogurt! Even with Strawberries!

View Quote â†‘ Saying that in another way, Dark Helmet is the former roommate of Lone Starr's first or second cousin. He could be Lone Starr's former roommate as well, but that's unlikely. It could also be that his father's brother (uncle) has a nephew through his wife, whose cousin would therefore not be a blood relative of Lone Starr's, making the roommate connection all the more ludicrous.

View Quote Look your highness, it's not that we're afraid, far from it. It's just that we've got this thing about death; it's not us.

View Quote [feeling the force of going at Ludicrous Speed] My brains are going into my feet!

View Quote [in tiny print]: If you can read this, you don't need glasses.