Snatch quotes

121 total quotes (ID: 544)

'Cousin' Avi
Brick Top
Bullet Tooth Tony
Multiple Characters

Brick Top: Pull your tongue out of my arsehole, Gary. Dogs do that. You're not a dog are ya Gary?
Gary: No, no I'm not.
Brick Top: However, you have all the characteristics of a dog, Gary... All except loyalty.
[Errol zaps Gary]
Turkish: [Narrating]It's rumored that Brick Top's favorite means of dispatch involves a stun gun, a plastic bag, a roll of tape, and a pack of hungry pigs.
Brick Top: You're a ruthless little **** Liam. I'll give ya that. But I got no time for grassers. Feed 'em to the pigs Errol... [turns to face the boxers in the ring] What the **** are you two looking at?

[On learning that Franky is making his way to a boxing match - and gambling] Avi: Did he have a case on him?
Doug the Head: Yes. He had a case.
Avi: And this schmuck is gambling? You're talking about Franky "I've got a problem with gambling" ****ing Four Fingers, Doug!
Doug the Head: Avi, I'm not telepathic.
Avi: Well you're plenty ****ing stupid, I'll give you that. Do you have any idea why they call him Franky "Four Fingers", Doug?
Doug the Head: No I have no idea.
Avi: Well because he makes stupid bets with dangerous people, and when he doesn't pay up, they give him the chop, Doug! And I'm not talking about his ****ing fore-skin either!

[Tyrone just backed into Franky Four Fingers' van]
Tyrone: I didn't see it there.
Vinny: It's a four ton truck, Tyrone. It's not as though it's a packet of ****ing peanuts now is it?
Tyrone: It was at a funny angle.
[All three turn and look back at the van]
Vinny: It's behind you Tyrone. Whenever you reverse, things come from behind ya'.

Avi: [To his aide 'Rosebud'] You gotta toothbrush? 'm goin' to London. [Into phone] You hear that, Doug? 'm comin' to London!
[Quick, split-second shots of Avi's flight from New York to London; instantly]
Doug the Head: Avi!
Avi: Shut up and sit down, you big, bald ****. [Doug sheepishly complies] I don't like leaving my own country Doug, and I especially don't like leaving it for anything less than warm, sandy beaches, and ****tails with little straw hats.
Doug the Head: We've got sandy beaches...
Avi: Yeah? So who the **** wants to see 'em?

Tommy: You said get a good deal.
Turkish: I fail to recognise the correlation between losing 10 grand, hospitalising Gorgeous, and a good deal. How are we gonna explain this to Brick Top? That his fight isn't gonna happen?
Tommy: We replace the fighter.
Turkish: Oh, and hope he doesn't notice? And who the **** are we gonna replace him with?
Tommy: What about John The Gun? Or, Mad Fist Willy?
Turkish: You're not exactly Mr Current Affairs, are you, Tommy? Mad Fist went mad, [a quick, split second shot of Mad Fist Willy going mad]and The Gun, shot himself [quick, split second shot of John The Gun shooting himself in the head]

[After the wheels have fallen off the caravan that Tommy and George have just bought from Mickey]
Mickey: The deal was you bought it like you saw it. Hey, look, I've helped you as much as I'm going to help you. See that car? Just use it, for you're not welcome anymore. You should **** off now while you still got the legs to carry you.
Gorgeous George: Nobody...
Mickey: Nobody brings a fella the size of you unless they're trying to say something without talking, right?
Tommy: Sorry, Mickey. Just give our money back and you can keep the caravan.
Mickey: Why the **** do I want a caravan that's got no ****ing wheels? You want to settle this with a fight?
Mrs. O'Neil: Over my dead body! Now, go on! Go on! I'll not have you fighting, Mickey! You know what happens when you fight.
Mickey: Get her to sit down. [Turns to face Gorgeous George] For ****'s sake! Want the money? I ain't ****ed you. I'll fight you for it. You and me.

Avi: Tony.
Bullet Tooth Tony: What?
Avi: Look in the dog.
Bullet Tooth Tony: What you mean, 'Look in the dog'?
Avi: I mean, open him up.
Bullet Tooth Tony: It's not a ****ing tin of baked beans! What do you mean 'open him up'?!
Avi: You know what I mean.
Bullet Tooth Tony: [Appalled] That's a bit strong, ain't it. I don't know about this.[hesitated, but gets the dog anyway, ready with a blade]
Vinny:[speaks in disbelief]No, you can't do this.
[the squeaky toy in the dog makes the dog squeak when he's barking]
Bullet Tooth Tony: It's ****ing squeaking!!
Avi: You never heard a dog squeak before? Gimme the goddamn gun!!

'Blagged'? Speak English to me Tony, I thought this country spawned the ****in' language and so far nobody seems to speak it.

I don't care if he's Muhammad I'm Hard Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.

Sol: What the **** is that?
Vinny: Heh heh. This, is a shotgun Sol.
Sol: It's a ****ing anti-aircraft gun, Vincent.
Vinny: So, I wanna raise some pulses don't I?
Sol: You'll raise Hell. Never mind pulses.

Sol: No, it's a moissanite.
Bad Boy Lincoln: A what-a-nite?
Sol: A moissanite is an artificial diamond, Lincoln. It's Mickey Mouse, mate. Spurious. Not genuine. And it's worth... **** all.

[Standing over Franky's body]
Bad Boy Lincoln: What has he got a tea cosy on his head for?
Sol: [sarcastic] To keep his head warm.
Bad Boy Lincoln: Well, what happened to him?
Sol: He got shot in the face, Lincoln. I would have thought that would be obvious.
Bad Boy Lincoln: What'd you do that for? You mistake him for a rabbit? What'd you want me to do about it?
Vinny: Sort it out.
Bad Boy Lincoln: I'm not a ****ing witch doctor.
Sol: But you are a bad-boy yardie, and bad-boy yardies are supposed to know how to get rid of bodies.
Bad Boy Lincoln: I create the bodies. I don't erase the bodies.

[to Turkish] You are on thin ****ing ice, my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks!

Franky Four Fingers: So the biblical scholars mis-translated the Hebrew word for "young woman" into the Greek word for "virgin." It was an easy mistake to make, since there is only a subtle difference in the spelling. But it was the "virgin" that caught people's attention. It's not every day a virgin conceives and bears a son. So you keep that for a couple of hundred years, and the next thing you know, you have the Holy Catholic Church. Oy vey.

[in front of Boris' house]
Turkish: He's left the door open.
Tommy: Shouldn't think that a good idea. Should we go in?
Turkish: I don't wanna go in there. He's a dangerous bastard. Taken too many disco biscuits in the heat of Russian disputations. He's got as many of these nuts [grabbing his nuts] as he has those nuts. [pointing to his head]
Tommy: I don't care if he's got ****ing hazelnuts. I want a gun that works and I'm gonna tell him.
Turkish:[Acts surprised about Tommy's confidence] My God, Tommy. You certainly got those minerals. Well, come on then. Before "Zee Germans" get here. You just tell him who's in charge.
[Boris comes from behind, covered in blood]
Tommy: Err, Boris.
[Boris punches Tommy in the nuts]
Turkish: You certainly told him, Tommy.
[Boris comes out from the House with the gun]
Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov:[in Russian] ..со мной? Ну что будете теперь делать? Что? (...With me? So what are you going to do now? Huh?)