Juno

Juno quotes

89 total quotes (ID: 307)

Bren MacGuff
Juno MacGuff
Mac MacGuff
Multiple Characters


I think I'm just going to nip it in the bud, you know, before it gets worse. 'Cause you know, they say pregnancy can often lead to, you know — an infant.


Hi, I'm calling to procure a hasty abortion...

You should've gone to China, you know, 'cause I hear they give away babies like free iPods. You know, they pretty much just put them in those t-shirt guns and shoot them out at sporting events.

Next time I see that Bleeker kid I'm going to punch him in the wiener.

Thanks for having me and my irresponsible child over to your house.

Hey there, big puffy version of Junebug!

Liberty Bell, if you put one more Bac-O on that potato, I'm gonna kick your little monkey butt.

In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty... handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with.

Is it boy troubles? Cause I don't really approve of you dating in your condition.

Juno has a great sense of humor. Just one of her many genetic gifts.

I think that kids get bored and they have intercourse.

Someone else is gonna find a precious blessing from Jesus in this garbage dump of a situation.

[to an ultrasound technician] My five-year-old daughter could do that, and let me tell you, she is not the brightest bulb in the tanning bed, so why don't you go back to night school in Manteno and learn a real trade?

You don't understand. Mark is a married man. There are boundaries.

We don't have a dog because you're allergic to their saliva.