N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

The Devil's Rejects

The Devil's Rejects quotes

44 total quotes

Captain Spaulding
Otis B. Driftwood
Sheriff John Quincy Wydell

Baby: I bet all the girls wanna **** you.
Roy Sullivan: Would you say that again?
Baby: I bet all the girls wanna **** you.
[mutual laughter] Roy Sullivan: Do you kiss your mama with that mouth?
Baby: Trust me, fella. That ain't the only thing I do with this mouth.
Captain Spaulding: I'm gonna have to be taking your car today. See I have some top secret clown business that supersedes any plans that you might have for this here vehicle.
[mutual laughter] Susan: What's that about clown business?
[laughs nervously] Captain Spaulding: [pause] Do I stutter, bitch?
Billy Ray Snapper: Yeah no problem. Shit always seems to come our way, Chief.
Sheriff John Wydell: Yeah maybe if you keep your mouth open long enough you can catch it all.
Sheriff John Wydell: Alright, here are those names you wanted.
Rondo:[Chuckling]These are some funny ass names.
Sheriff John Wydell: Yeah look who's ****in' talking Rondo.
Charlie Altamont: Oh...yeah! Lord have mercy!! What a mornin'!! Clevon!!
Clevon: Yeah boss?
Charlie Altamont: You know why I come here to get these chickens?
Clevon: No boss.
Charlie Altamont: 'Cuz my brother makes the best fried chicken in the world!
Clevon: Is that right?
Charlie Altamont: (to Darrell) Yeah, good mornin' good mornin' good mornin' good mornin' sir! How are ya!
Darrell: How're you all doin? G'morning.
Charlie Altamont: Good, good, good, whatcha got for me?
Darrell: We got these, uh, real cute barred rock chickens.
Charlie Altamont: Yeah! I see it!
Darrell: Some nice, long-legged Rhode Island Reds.
Charlie Altamont: RHODE ISLAND RED!! I like that, huh! I want a Rhode Island red for me, all right? Two of 'em.
Darrell: Rhode Island Red...two. (long pause, scratches his nose) Now ya'll ain't planning on ****in' these chickens are ya?
Charlie Altamont: (after a long pause) What the **** are you getting at? Do you **** chickens?
Darrell: Well, I thought about ****in' some chickens before, eh? If you want to have a good time and you need some pussy, you can (motions with his hands) cut that chicken's head off, stick yo' dick in the ass of that chicken, and that damn chicken'll go crazy on your ass and go "Caaaaah".
Charlie Altamont: Are you saying that I would cut off a chicken's head, put my dick in it, **** it...and go "Aah"? You accuse me of ****ing a chicken, mother****er?
Darrell: Nah, I ain't--I ain't callin' you a chicken ****er but...that boy over there looks se--sexually frustrated, and I don't approve of chicken ****ing.
Clevon: Did you hear what he called me, Boss? I ain't--he called me a ****ing chicken ****er!
Darrell: I didn't say--
Charlie Altamont: Go back and grab the ****in' chickens, Clevon!! (to Darrell) Here, five.
Darrell: Appreciate it...thank y'all.
Clevon: Chickenf--He's a chicken ****er!!!
Charlie Altamont: It's all right. Put 'em back there. Next time we go someplace else.
Clevon: We ain't never buying chickens from him again, boss!!
Charlie Altamont: Yeah, I know.
Clevon: (yelling back to Darrell) You inbred! Inbred!!

[Otis and Baby invade a motel room, taking hostages] Baby: Holy shit, check out that jacket.
Otis: What jacket?
Baby: On the TV.
Otis: Bitch **** the TV!
Baby: Hey, **** you!
Otis: **** you, will you just pay attention to the business at hand here!
Marty Walker: That goddamn ****ing Elvis Presley
Sheriff John Wydell: What did you say about the King?
Marty Walker: I said he died three days before Grouch...
[Wydell grabs Walker] Sheriff John Wydell: Son, if you ever say another derogatory word about Elvis Aron Presley in my presence again, I will kick the living shit out of you.
[The rejects are being captured by Wydell] [To Captain Spaulding]:Charlie Altamont: Business is business, baby. Baby: You ****ing asshole!
Sheriff John Wydell: She's right Charlie, you are an asshole. Why don't you get back on your ****ing horse and ride.

[While hijacking a car with a boy inside] What's the matter kid, don't you like clowns? [Kid nods "no"] Why? Don't we make ya laugh, aren't we ****in' funny? You best come up with an answer because I'm gonna be checking up on you and your mama. And if you don't have a reason why you hate clowns, I'm gonna kill your whole ****in' family.

Boy the next word that comes out of your mouth better be some ****ing brilliant Mark Twain shit. Cause it's definetly getting chisled on your tombstone.

Do I stutter, bitch?

Dying's not an option, now you stick that back in that gray matter of yours and you make that stick. Cause any other thought's gonna get you cold slab toe tagged, mailed home to your mama in a plastic bag, are we crystal.

I could really go for some tooty ****in' fruity.

[Talking to himself in mirror] You know I got to tell you, that's some catchphrase you got there, Devil's Rejects. What? You got something to say to me clown, huh. I bet you scare lots of folks, don't ya? Yeah, regular ****in' killer. You want a piece of this mother****er? You want a piece of this? Huh, what you got! What you got! Lord I am your arm of justice. Lord I am your arm of justice. Lord I am your arm of justice. Your righteous sword of vengeance. Let my blows be true. From the illusion lead me to truth. From darkness lead me to light. From death lead me to eternal life.

Consider me ****in' Willy ****in' Wonka! This is my ****ing chocolate factory! You got it? My factory!

From delusion lead me to truth. From darkness lead me to light. From death lead me to eternal life.

I am the Devil, and I am here to do the Devil's work.

[After sex] You're giving a good riding tonight.

Ha, that's what they all say "**** you". Well it ain't gonna save you. It don't scare me none. And it certainly doesn't make you a ****in' hero!

As God is my witness, I have only just begun.

Hoss, I want you to pray to your God. I want you to pray that he comes to save you. I want lightning to come down and crash upon my ****in' head!

Well if you let me finish, I was about to call you goddamned pig ****ing, pussy piece of shit.