The Dark Knight

The Dark Knight quotes

128 total quotes (ID: 150)

Alfred Pennyworth
Bruce Wayne/Batman
Commissioner Gordon
Harvey Dent/ Two-Face
Rachel Dawes
The Joker


[Gordon walks into the darkened interrogation room where the Joker calmly sits at a table]
Joker: [drawling mockingly] Evening, Commissioner.
Gordon: [after sitting down] Harvey Dent never made it home.
Joker: Of course not.
Gordon: What have you done with him?
Joker: [innocently] Me? I was right here! [shows handcuffs] Who did you leave him with, hm? Your people? Assuming, of course, that they are still your people...and not Maroni's. Does it depress you, Commissioner, to know just how alone you really are? Does it make you feel responsible for Harvey Dent's current predicament?
Gordon: Where is he?
Joker: What's the time?
Gordon: What difference does that make?
Joker: Well, depending on the time, he could be in one place, or several.
Gordon: [uncuffs the Joker and gets up to leave] If we're gonna play games, I'm gonna need a cup of coffee.
Joker: [sarcastically] Ah, the "good cop, bad cop" routine?
Gordon: [as he leaves the room] Not exactly. [closes the door]
[The lights suddenly turn on, revealing Batman standing behind the Joker, who gets his head smashed into the table]
Joker: Never start with the head, the victim gets all fuzzy. He can't feel the next...
[Batman cuts him off by smashing the Joker's knuckles with his fist]
Joker: [comically waiting to register the pain] See?
Batman: You wanted me? Here I am.
Joker: I wanted to see what you'd do. And you didn't disappoint. You let 5 people die. Then you let Dent take your place. Even to a guy like me, that's cold.
Batman: Where's Dent?
Joker: Those mob fools want you gone so they can get back to the way things were. But I know the truth. There's no going back. You've changed things...forever.
Batman: Then why'd you wanna kill me?
Joker: [laughs hysterically] I don't wanna kill you! What would I do without you? Go back to ripping off mob dealers? No. No...no. You...you complete me.
Batman: You're garbage who kills for money.
Joker: Don't talk like one of them, you're not! Even if you'd like to be. To them, you're just a freak–like me! They need you right now. When they don't...they'll cast you out. Like a leper. See, their morals, their code: it's a bad joke. They're dropped at the first sign of trouble. They're only as good as the world allows them to be. I'll show you. When the chips are down, these, uh...civilized people, they'll eat each other. See, I'm not a monster; I'm just ahead of the curve.
[Batman grabs the Joker across the table]
Batman: Where's Dent?
Joker: You have all these rules, and you think they'll save you.
[Batman slams the Joker against the wall]
Commissioner Gordon: [Looking through the glass at Batman and the Joker] He's in control.
Batman: I have one rule.
Joker: Ooh, then that's the rule you'll have to break to know the truth.
Batman: Which is?
Joker: The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules. And tonight you're gonna break your one rule.
Batman: I'm considering it.
Joker: No. You're gonna have to play my little game if you want to save one of them.
Batman: "Them?"
Joker: You know, for a while there, I thought you really were Dent. The way you threw yourself after her...[laughs]
[This comment throws Batman into a fit of rage; he flips the Joker onto the table and wedges the chair against the door handle so no one else can get in]
Joker: [laughs] Look at you go. Does Harvey know about you and his little bunny?
[Batman smashes The Joker's head against the glass window]
Batman: WHERE ARE THEY?!
Joker: [adopts a lecturing tone] Killing is making a choice...
[Batman punches The Joker in the face]
Batman: WHERE ARE THEY?!
Joker: You choose between one life or the other. Your friend the District Attorney. Or his blushing bride to be.
[Batman punches The Joker in the face again as The Joker laughs hysterically through all of it]
Joker: You have nothing–nothing to threaten me with, nothing to do with all your strength.
[Batman picks The Joker up by his shirt]
Joker: Don't worry, I'm gonna tell you where they are. Both of 'em. And that's the point: you'll have to choose. He's at 250 52nd Street. And she's at...Avenue X at Cicero.
[Batman storms out]
Gordon: Which one of them are you going after?
Batman: RACHEL! [speeds off on the Batpod]
Gordon: We'll get Dent! [to the other police] We're going to 250 52nd Street!


[Two-Face has kidnapped Gordon's family, and Gordon has followed them to the place where Rachel died]
Gordon: [as he walks into the building] Dent!
Two-Face: [after knocking Gordon to the ground from behind] This is where they brought her, Gordon...after your men handed her over. This is where she died.
Gordon: I know. I was here, trying to save her.
Two-Face: But you didn't!
Gordon: I couldn't!
Two-Face: Yes, you could have. If you had listened to me...if you stood up against corruption...instead of doing your deal with the devil!
Gordon: I was trying to fight the mob!
Two-Face: You wouldn't dare try to justify yourself if you knew what I lost. Have you ever had to talk to the person you love most? To tell them it's going to be all right, when you know that it's not? Well, you're about to know what it feels like, Gordon. Then you can look me in the eye and tell me you're sorry.
Gordon: [scared] You're not going to hurt my family.
Two-Face: [moving over to Gordon's wife and children with his gun out] No, just the person you love most. [points the gun at his Gordon's wife] Is it your wife?
Gordon: Put the gun down Dent! [whispers] please.
[Two-Face moves the gun to his daughter]
Gordon: [reaches towards them] Please.
[Two-Face puts the gun to Gordon's son]
Gordon: Goddamn it, will you stop pointing the gun at my family?!
Two-Face: We have a winner.
Barbara: [as Harvey grabs their son] No, Jim, stop him!
Gordon: Harvey? Harvey! [desperate] I'm sorry! For everything! Please, don't hurt my son.
Two-Face: [seems to consider it but grows angry when he hears police sirens] You brought your cops?!
Gordon: All they know is this is a situation. They don't know who or what, they're just creating a perimeter.
Two-Face: You think I want to escape from this?! There is no escape from this!
Batman: [appearing from the shadows] You don't want to hurt the boy, Harvey.
Two-Face: It's not about what I want! It's about what's fair! You thought we could be decent men in an indecent time! But you were wrong. The world is cruel. And the only morality in a cruel world...[pulls out his coin]...is chance. Unbiased, unprejudiced, fair. His son's got the same chance she had: 50/50.
Batman: What happened to Rachel wasn't chance. We decided to act. We three.
Two-Face: Then why was it me who was the only one who lost everything?!
Batman: [pause] It wasn't.
Two-Face: [still holding a gun to Gordon's son's head] The Joker chose me!
Batman: Because you were the best of us. He wanted to prove that even someone as good as you could fall.
Two-Face: And he was right.
Batman: You're the one pointing the gun, Harvey. So point it at the people responsible.
Two-Face: Fair enough. You first. [flips his coin, it lands "tails," he shoots Batman in the stomach as Gordon's family screams] My turn [puts the gun to his own head, flips the coin and it lands "heads" up so he points the gun at Gordon's son's head]
Gordon: Harvey, you're right. Rachel's death was my fault. Pl-Please, don't punish the boy. Please punish me.
Two-Face: [still holding the gun to the boy's head] I'm about to. Tell your boy it's going to be all right. Lie...like I lied.
Gordon: [trying to calm his son] It's going to be all right, son.
[Two-Face flips the coin, but Batman tackles him over the side of the building before he can catch it, Batman saves Gordon's son but Harvey falls to the ground; Gordon runs over to the ledge where Batman is holding on to a pole with one hand and Gordon's son with the other, he pushes the boy up over the ledge and Gordon's wife runs over and hugs him, but before Gordon can help Batman, Batman loses his grip and crashes through several planks before he lands next to the motionless Harvey]
Gordon's Son: [after he follows Gordon down to where Batman lay unmoving next to Dent] Daddy! Dad, is he okay?
Gordon: [relieved as Batman slowly pulls himself up to his knees] Thank you.
Batman: You don't have to thank me. [he laborously gets to his feet in obvious pain]
Gordon: Yes, I do. [both look at Harvey's body on the ground] The Joker won. Harvey's prosecution, everything he fought for, undone. Every chance we had at fixing our city dies with Harvey's reputation. We bet it all on him. The Joker took the best of us and tore it down. People will lose hope.
Batman: They won't. [speaking tiredly through intense pain] They must never know what he did.
Gordon: Five dead, two of them cops. You can't sweep that up.
Batman: But the Joker cannot win. [kneels down next to Harvey, whose burnt left side is facing up] Gotham needs its true hero. [turns Harvey's head so that his unmarred side faces up]
Gordon: [imediately understanding, whispers] No.
Batman: [quoting Harvey Dent] "You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain." I can do those things because I'm not a hero, unlike Dent. I killed those people. That's what I can be.
Gordon: [visibly hurt at Batman willingly sacrificing himself] No, no! You can't, you're not!
Batman: I'm whatever Gotham needs me to be. [hands Gordon his radio] Call it in.
. . .
Gordon: [speaking at a memorial for Harvey with a giant picture of Dent as he was, held in the same street as Loeb's funeral] A hero. Not the hero we deserved, but the hero we needed. Nothing less than a knight...shining.
Gordon: [talking to Batman as we see him take an ax to the Bat-signal] They'll hunt you.
Batman: You'll hunt me. You'll condemn me, set the dogs on me. Because that's what needs to happen.
Batman: [talking to Gordon as we see Alfred burning Rachel's letter to Bruce] Because sometimes the truth isn't good enough. Sometimes people deserve more.
Batman: [talking to Gordon as we see Lucius typing his name into the sonar display before it self-destructs] Sometimes people deserve to have their faith rewarded. [Lucius smiles to himself and walks away]
Gordon's Son: [as Batman runs] Batman? Batman! [looks up to Gordon] Why is he running, Dad?
Gordon: Because we have to chase him.
Police officer: Okay, we're going in! Go, go! Move!
Gordon's Son: He didn't do anything wrong.
Gordon: [visibly shaken, but respect clearly evident on his face] Because he's the hero that Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now...[as Gordon continues, we see a wounded Batman running from the police and their dogs]...so we'll hunt him...[Batman reaches the Batpod and rides off]...because he can take it...because he's not a hero...[Batman is riding through the streets of Gotham on the Batpod]...he's a silent guardian, a watchful protector...a Dark Knight.
[title card appears and credits roll]

[The Joker, dressed in a nurse uniform and wig, visits Harvey "Two-Face" in the hospital. He shoots a police officer before walking over to Harvey's bedside]
Joker: [raising the upper-half of the bed up, mutters a tune while doing so] La, de, la, de, la, de, lum [takes off his surgical mask]
[Harvey immediately becomes enraged and struggles to get out of the bed he's tied to]
Joker: [sits down by the bed, sighs and with a sympathetic tone and forced smile] Hiii. [takes off his wig as Harvey stops struggling, shaking his hair back into its messy state with his hands] You know, I don't want there to be any hard feelings between us, Harvey. When you and, uhh, Ra...
Two-Face: Rachel!
Joker: [motions his hands before him as he talks] ...Rachel were being abducted, I was sitting in Gordon's cage. Now, uh, I – I didn't rig those charges.
Two-Face: Your men, your plan.
Joker: [serious, smirks slowly] Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? [Two-Face tries to raise his arms] I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! You know...I just do things. The mob has plans. The cops have plans. Gordon's got plans. You know...they're schemers. Schemers trying to control their little worlds. I'm not a schemer. I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control things really are. So when I say... [grabs Harvey's hand, Harvey struggles a little] eh, come here. When I say that you and your girlfriend [slowly slaps Harvey's hand a couple of times] was nothing personal, you know that I'm telling the truth. [starts unstrapping Harvey's wrists from one side] It's the schemers... [goes to the other side] that put you where you are. You were a schemer. You had plans. And, uh ... [starts unstrapping Harvey's other wrist] look where that got you.
[Once Harvey's other wrist is free, he attempts to grab The Joker, the two struggling with each other until The Joker grabs a hold of Harvey's hands, moving them from side to side]
Joker: I just did what I do best. I took your little plan and [sing-song tone] I turned it on itself. [Harvey stops struggling, The Joker looking down at him] Look at what I did to this city with a few drums of gas and a couple of bullets. Hm? You know–you know what I noticed? Nobody panics when things go [does the quote-fingers] "according to plan"... even if the plan is horrifying. If tomorrow I told the press that, like, a gang-banger will get shot, or a truck load of soldiers will be blown up, nobody panics, because it's all part of the plan. But when I say that one little old mayor will die... [voice rises hysterically] well, then everyone loses their minds! [lets go of Harvey's hands and pulls out a gun, the handle facing Harvey] Introduce a little anarchy. [puts the gun into Harvey's hand, ****ing the gun] Upset the established order, then everything becomes...chaos. [guides the gun to his own forehead, smacking his lips] I'm an agent of chaos. Oh, and you know the thing about chaos? It's fair.
Two-Face: [looks down, pulls out his lucky coin with his free hand and shows the "heads" side to The Joker] You live.
Joker: Mmm-hm. [smacks lips together]
Two-Face: [turns coin around, showing the burnt, "tails" side] You die.
Joker: Hmmm, now we're talking.
[Harvey flips the coin, assuming it landed, The Joker then looks at him]

[The Joker interrupts the meeting of mob bosses]
Joker: [fake laughter done in a deadpan voice] Ha ha ha ha, hahaha, ha, ha, ha, oh, a-hee-hee, ha ha, oh, hee hee, hee ha, ahaha. [returns to normal voice] I thought my jokes were bad.
Gambol: Give me one reason why I shouldn't have my boy here pull your head off.
Joker: How 'bout a magic trick? [he slams a pencil into the table, point first] I'm gonna make this pencil disappear.
[Gambol's henchman tries to attack him; in one swift motion the Joker then slams the man's head into the pencil, forcing the entire pencil through his eye socket; the man falls over dead]
Joker: Ta-daa! [looks at where the pencil was with mock surprise] It's...it's gone! Oh, and by the way, the suit? It wasn't cheap. You ought to know, you bought it.
Gambol: That's it. [rises from his chair]
The Chechen: I want to hear, proposition.
Joker: Let's wind the clock back a year. These cops and lawyers wouldn't dare cross any of you. I mean, what happened? Did-did your balls drop off, hm? You see, a guy like me...
Gambol: A freak.
[The men in the room laugh]
Joker: ...A guy like me...look, listen, I know why you choose to have your little [clears throat] "group therapy sessions" in broad daylight, I know why you're afraid to go out at night: The Batman. See, Batman has shown Gotham your true colors. Unfortunately, Dent...he's just the beginning, and as–as for th-the television's so-called "plan", Batman has no jurisdiction. He'll find him and make him squeal. I know squealers when I see them, and...[points at the televised Lau]
The Chechen: What do you propose?
Joker: It's simple. We, uh...kill the Batman.
[Men in the room laugh again]
Sal Maroni: If it's so simple, why haven't you done it already?
Joker: If you're good at something, never do it for free.
The Chechen: So, how much you want?
Joker: [brief pause] Half.
[Once again, the men in the room laugh]
Gambol: [whispers] You're crazy.
Joker: [quickly glancing up, defensively] I'm not. No, I'm not. If we don't deal with this now, soon, uh, little–Gambol?–here won't be able to get a nickel for his grandma.
Gambol: [slams the table, and angrily rises from his seat] Enough from the clown!
Joker: Ah-ah. [rises from his seat as well, revealing grenades and explosives under his suit jacket with a string attached to his thumb] Let's not blow this out of proportion.
Gambol: You think you can steal from us and just walk away?!
Joker: [matter-of-factly] Yeah.
Gambol: I'm putting the word out: five hundred grand for this clown dead, and a million alive–so I can teach him some manners first.
Joker: Ah, uh...all right. So listen, why don't you give me a call when you want to start taking things a little more seriously? Here is...my...card. [pulls out a Joker playing card and shows it to everyone] Mm-hm.
[Waves his thumb as he retreats from the room]

Natasha: I don't think Gotham is a good place to raise children.
Bruce: [jokingly defensive] Hey, I was raised in Gotham and I turned out all right.
Harvey: Is Wayne Manor in Gotham City's limits?
Bruce: [laughs] The Palisades? Sure. As our new DA, you should probably check out where your jurisdiction ends.
Natasha: No, I mean, how can you justify supporting a vigilante?
Harvey: Well, I think that Gotham should be proud that one of its citizens is standing up for what's right.
Natasha: But this is a democracy.
Bruce: Exactly. Who elected the Batman?
Harvey: We did. All of us who let scum like over our city. When their enemies were at the gates, the Romans would suspend democracy and appoint one man to protect the city. And it wasn't considered an honor, it was considered a public service.
Rachel: Harvey, the last person the Romans elected was named Caesar, and he never gave up his power.
Harvey: Fine. You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain. Look, whoever the Batman is, he's looking for someone to take his place. He doesn't want to do it forever.
Natasha: Someone like you, Mr. Dent?
Harvey: Maybe. If I'm up to it.
Natasha: [holding her napkin up, covering the upper half of Harvey's face, laughing] What if Harvey Dent is the Caped Crusader.
Harvey: [stroking Rachel's hand] If I was sneaking out every night, someone would noticed by now.
Bruce: [who has been listening and thinking intently] Well, I'm sold. Dent, I'm going to throw you a fundraiser.
Harvey: That's very nice of you Bruce, but I'm not up for election for another three years. [Bruce interrupts]
Bruce: [completely serious] No, no, no, you don't understand. One party with my pals, and you'll never have to worry about another cent.

Gambol henchman: Yo, Gambol. Somebody's here for you. They say they've just killed the Joker. They brought the body.
[Men walk in carrying Joker, covered from head to toe in trashbags, they place him on the pool table]
Gambol: So, he's dead? That's five-hundred gra...
[Joker suddenly stands, fatally stabbing two of Gambol's henchman as he moves, then hold a knife to Gambol's throat from behind]
Joker: How about alive, hm?
[Grabs Gambol, and a holds a knife to his cheek]
Joker: Wanna know how I got these scars? My father was...a drinker, and a fiend. And one night he comes home crazier than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend herself; he doesn't like that. Not...one...bit. So, me watching–he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it. He turns to me, and says..."Why so serious?" So, he comes at me with the knife, "Why so serious?!" He sticks the blade in my mouth, "Let's put a smile on that face!" And...[turns to look at one of Gambol's henchman who looks terrified, and then says]...why so serious?
[Joker quickly cuts open Gambol's face, off screen]
Joker: [to Gambol's henchmen] Now, our operation is small, but [grabs a pool stick] there's a lot of potential for aggressive expansion. So, which of our fine gentlemen would like to join our team? Oh! There's only one spot open right now, so we're gonna have tryouts. [breaks the stick in two, throws the pointy end on the floor in between three of Gambol's henchmen] Hm...make it fast.

[Batman has tracked the Joker to an unfinished skyscraper, overlooking the two ferries that he is threatening to blow up. As Batman approaches, the dogs that the Joker has guarding him begin to growl. The Joker turns to face him]
Joker: Ah, you made it! I'm so thrilled!
Batman: Where's the detonator?
[The Joker shocks his head to the side]
Joker: [to the dogs] Go get him!
[The dogs attack. Batman disposes of the dogs, but is brutally beaten down by the Joker overpowering him with a steel pipe. Batman's 'sonar-vision' begins malfunctioning and the Joker forces Batman to the ground and subdues him]
Joker: [struggling to keep Batman down] We really should stop this fighting. Otherwise, we'll miss the fireworks!
Batman: There won't be any fireworks.
Joker: [expecting one of the two ferries to explode] And here we...go! [neither ferry explodes and the Joker looks out at them confused. He turns to a small clock and realizes that it is past midnight]
Batman: What were you trying to prove? That deep down, everyone's as ugly as you? You're alone.
Joker: You can't rely on anyone these days. You got to do everything yourself. [to Batman] Don't we? That's okay. I came prepared. [takes out a detonator, presumably the one that will blow up both ships] It's a funny world that we live in...speaking of which, you know how I got these scars? [motioning towards the scars on his mouth]
Batman: No, but I know how you got these!
[Batman fires his steel spike protrusions from his gauntlet, hitting the Joker's hand and releasing his grip on the detonator and Batman; Batman grabs him and throws him over the edge of the skyscraper. Falling and laughing, the Joker is caught by Batman's grappling wire and is hoisted up to where Batman is. The Joker moans in disappointment as he is raised]
Joker: Ugh, you. You just couldn't let me go, could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You...truly are...incorruptible, aren't you, huh? You won't kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. And I won't kill you because...you're just too much fun! [laughs a bit] I think you and I are destined to do this forever.
Batman: You'll be in a padded cell forever.
Joker: Maybe we could share one! You know, they'll be doubling up the rate this city's inhabitants are losing their minds.
Batman: This city just showed you that it's full of people ready to believe in good.
Joker: Until their spirits break completely! Until they get a good look at the real Harvey Dent and all the heroic things he's done. You didn't think I'd risk losing the battle for Gotham's soul in a fist fight with you? No. You need an ace in the hole. Mine's Harvey.
Batman: What did you do?
Joker: I took Gotham's "White Knight", and I...brought him down to our level. It wasn't hard. You see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes is a little push!
[The Joker begins to laugh hysterically as Batman storms off. A SWAT team arrives and presumably takes the Joker into custody]

You thought we could be decent men in an indecent time...but you were wrong! The world is cruel. And the only morality in a cruel world is chance. Unbiased, unprejudiced, fair.

You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

[In the holding tank at the police station, one of the Joker's henchman is complaining of stomach pains]
Henchman: Please, my insides hurt.
Cop #1: I don't really care. Back away.
Henchman: The boss said he'd make the voices go away. He said he'd go inside and replace 'em with bright lights...like Christmas!
Cop #1: You're outta your mind, pal. Back off.
[The henchman collapses onto the ground and starts having convulsions]
Cop #1: We need a medic in the holding tank. Come on, get the door open. [enters the holding tank and yells at the other inmates] You guys back off!
[The medic examines the henchman's belly, which has what appears to be a rectangle-shaped bruise with a wire attached]
Cop #2: What's that? Jeez.
Medic: He's got some kind of a...contusion.

[The Chechen is called by the Joker to an old tanker ship at the docks, inside he sees the Joker acting psychotic and antagonizing a tied-up Lau on top of the Joker's massive stacks of his half of the mob's cash]
Joker: [to the gagged and tied Lau; imititating a plane] Having fun?! [throws wads of cash at him] I told you I'm a man of my word.
The Chechen: [as the Joker climbs down] What are you planning to do with all your money?
Joker: You see, I'm a guy of simple taste. [pulls out his gun] I enjoy dynamite, and gunpowder, and gasoline! [Joker's men douse the money with gasoline and others hold the Chechen back as he tries to stop them] And do you know what they all have in common? [takes the Chechen's cigar] They're cheap.
The Chechen: What are you doing?!
Joker: [throws the cigar onto the money, which bursts into flames] Like I said, I'm a man of my word: I'm only burning my half. All you care about is money. This town deserves a better class of criminal, and I'm gonna give it to 'em. Tell your men they work for me now. This is my city.
The Chechen: They won't work for a freak.
Joker: [exaggerating the mob boss's accent] Frrreeaakk. [pulling out a small knife] Why don't we cut you up into little pieces and feed you to your pooches, hmm?[Joker's thugs pull away the mob boss] And then we'll see how loyal a hungry dog really is! [Reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a cell phone, and begins dialing numbers] It's not about money, it's about sending a message. Everything burns!
[Interrupting the news cast in which Coleman Reese is trying to announce Batman's identity] Joker: I had a vision of a world without Batman. The mob ground out their little profit, and the police tried to shut them down one block at a time. And it was so...boring. I've had a change of heart. I don't want Mr. Reese spoiling everything, but why should I have all the fun? Let's give someone else a chance. If Coleman Reese isn't dead in sixty minutes, then I blow up a hospital. [hangs up the phone]

Bruce Wayne: [watching the tape the Joker broadcast on the news] Killing me won't get their money back. I knew the mob wouldn't go down without a fight, but this is different–they crossed the line.
Alfred: You crossed the line first, sir. You squeezed and hammered them to the point of desperation. And in their desperation they turned to a man they didn't fully understand.
Bruce Wayne: Criminals aren't complicated, Alfred. We just need to figure out what he's after.
Alfred: With all due respect, Master Wayne, perhaps this is a man that you don't fully understand. When I was in Burma, a long time ago, my friends and I were working for the local government. They were trying to buy the loyalty of tribal leaders by bribing them with precious stones. But their caravans were being raided in a forest north of Rangoon by a bandit. So we started looking for the stones. But after six months, we couldn't find anyone who had traded with him. One day I found a child playing with a ruby the size of a tangerine. The bandit had been throwing the stones away.
Bruce Wayne: Then why steal them?
Alfred: Because he thought it was good sport. Because some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

[Alfred, after finding Bruce not in the penthouse and his bed not even slept in, leaves the building and walks to a nearby construction site and enters a giant container, which conceals an elevator that lowers him into the makeshift Batcave–where he finds Bruce stitching up his wounds from the previous night]
Alfred: It'll be nice when the Manor is rebuilt. Then you can swap not sleeping in a penthouse...to not sleeping in a mansion.
[Finally reaches Bruce and sees the poor job he's doing at stitching his wound]
Alfred: Every time you stitch yourself, you do make a bloody mess. [begins to take over and inspect Bruce's work]
Bruce: It forces me to learn from my mistakes.
Alfred: Then you should be pretty knowledgeable by know, sir.
Bruce: My armor, it's carrying too much weight. I need to be faster.
Alfred: [inspecting the wound] I'm sure Mr. Fox can oblige. Did you get mauled by a tiger?
Bruce: [quietly; sheepish] It was a dog.
Alfred: [looks up briefly] Huh?
Bruce: [defensively, motioning with his hand] It was a big dog. There were more copycats last night, Alfred. With guns.
Alfred: Why don't you hire them and take the weekend off?
Bruce: That isn't exactly what I had in mind when I said I wanted to inspire people.
Alfred: I know. [finishes up] But things have improved. Look at the new district attorney.
Bruce: [focusing on the display of monitors in front of him, on which he brings up various footage of Harvey Dent] I am. Closely. I need to know if he can be trusted.
Alfred: [pointing to a monitor showing video of Dent and Rachel getting out of a cab] Are you interested in his character or his, ah...social circle?
Bruce: Who Rachel spends her time with is her business. [Gets up and walks to a table with a change of clothes]
Alfred: I trust you don't have me followed on my day off.
Bruce: If you ever took one, I might. [takes off his shirt revealing many horrific battle scars]
Alfred: [noticing the scars with a caring look] Know your limits, Master Wayne.
Bruce: Batman has no limits.
Alfred: Well, you do, sir.
Bruce: [putting on a new shirt] Well, can't afford to know 'em.
Alfred: And what's gonna happen on the day that you find out?
Bruce: [buttoning the shirt] We all know how much you like to say: "I told you so."
Alfred: On that day, Master Wayne, even I won't want to...probably.

Clown (gunman): That's a lot of money. If this Joker guy was so smart, he would've had us bring a bigger car. [points his gun at the Joker, who is still in disguise] I'm betting the Joker told you to kill me soon as we loaded the cash.
The Joker: [chuckles] No, no, no, no. I kill the bus driver. [slowly steps to his right]
Clown (gunman): [confused] Bus driver? [moves gun to the right] What bus driver?
[A school bus drives through the wall, killing the henchman. The clown-masked bus driver hops out]
Clown (bus driver): School's out, time to go. [begins helping the masked Joker load the cash] Cat's not getting up, is he?
[The bus driver begins to load the money into the school bus]
Clown (bus driver): That's a lot of money. [small pause] What happened to the rest of the guys?
[The masked Joker turns his back to the bus driver and walks forward, casually gunning him down behind him]

[One of Wayne Enterprises' accountants has traced the money and figured out that Bruce Wayne must be Batman, and confronts Lucius Fox with schematics of the Wayne Enterprises prototype Tumbler, which is obviously the Batmobile]
Coleman Reese: I want $10 million a year, for the rest of my life.
Lucius: Let me get this straight. You think that your client, one of the wealthiest, most powerful men in the world, is secretly a vigilante who spends his nights beating criminals to a pulp with his bare hands...and your plan is to blackmail this person? [pauses, smiles] Good luck.
[The accountant slowly realizes what Wayne/Batman could do to him. He gets up from his seat and leaves the schematics on Fox's desk]
Coleman Reese: You can...keep these...
[Lucius calmly goes back to reading his paperwork]