I guess I have a lot of borderline health disorders that limit me politically when it comes to eating.

I recommend the pi?a coladas. They are excellent and very authentic tasting.

I'll have you know that I come from a very dysfunctional family. I can spot personality disorders a mile away.

I've had enough bad experiences and growth to last me plenty...Right now, I'd be glad to trade some growth for happiness.

James McCaffrey -- Fred

James Urbaniak -- Robert Crumb

Joyce Brabner -- Real Joyce

Judah Friedlander -- Toby Radloff

Look Toby, the guys in that movie are not 28 year-old file clerks who live with their grandmothers in an ethnic ghetto...They didn't get their computers like you did, by trading in a bunch of box tops and $49.50 at the supermarket...Sure, go to the movies and daydream, but Revenge of the Nerds ain't reality. It's just Hollywood bullsh*t.

Madylin Sweeten -- Danielle

Maggie Moore -- Alice Quinn

Man, she's got good looking handwriting.

Molly Shannon -- Stage Joyce

Paul Giamatti -- Harvey Pekar

Shari Springer Berman -- Interviewer