ALL A B C D E F G H I J K L M
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

Peter: (angrily) You know what, buddy? You missed my engagement party tonight.
Carl: Oh no. Oh shoot, you're kidding? That was tonight?
Peter: Mm-hm.
Carl: I'm so sorry, man, I totally gapped it! Listen, I'll make it up to you, I promise! I swear, you pick the day, any day you want, we'll go out, we'll swashbuckle!
Peter: What does that even mean?
Carl: I don't know.
Peter: This wasn't just drinks at a bar, Carl! This was MY engagement party! You only get married once.
Carl: (uncomfortably) Well, I certainly wouldn't do it again. (he's been divorced from his wife for three years.)
Peter:: (annoyed) I know Carl, I know that Stephanie left you and you bitched because of it, but this isn't about you. This is about me! When's the last time you did anything fun? You're always making excuses, "I don't want to commit, I don't wanna get tied down!" I mean, do you even know my fiancee's last name?
Carl: Yeah! It's Fisher, Fishman. Wait.. Fish-wall...
Peter: Fishwall? You think her name is Lucy... Fishwall?
Carl: No. It's wrong.
Peter: It's Burns!
Carl: Burns?
Peter: It's Lucy Burns, Carl. And guess what? She doesn't like my best friend. And I keep trying to think of reasons why she should, but you know what? I can't think any. (starts to leave)
Carl: Pete, I...
Peter: I don't wanna hear another excuse, Carl! Jesus! You do whatever you want! I'm just telling you, if you don't change your life, (exits downstairs) you're gonna end up a LONELY guy, Carl! A LOOOOOOOONELY GUY! [Carl dejectedly shuts the door]


  »   More Quotes from
  »   Back to the