Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? 1966 quotes, page 2

George

Let me tell you a secret, baby — there are easier things in this world, if you, uh… happen to be teaching at a university, there are easier things than being married to the daughter of the president of that university. There are easier things in this world.

Martha

It should be an extraordinary opportunity. For some men, it would be the chance of a lifetime.

George

There are, believe me, easier things in this world.

Martha

Some men would give their right arm for the chance!

George

Alas, Martha, in reality, it works out that the sacrifice is of a somewhat more private portion of the anatomy.

George

All right! The dancing's over!

Honey

Violence! Violence! Oo-hoo!

Martha

Well, aren't you going to apologize?

George

Wasn't my fault — the road should've been straight.

Martha

Not that! For making her throw up.

George

I did not make her throw up.

Martha

You most certainly did.

George

I did not.

Honey

No, now, no…

Martha

Well, who do you think did? Sexy, back there? You think he made his own wife sick?

George

Well, you make me sick.

Martha

That's different.

Martha

Who's afraid of Virginia Woolf / Virginia Woolf, Virginia Woolf / Who's afraid of Virginia Woolf…

Martha

What's the matter? Didn't ya think that was funny? I thought it was a scream.

Martha

You laughed your head off when you heard it at the party.

George

I smiled. I didn't laugh my head off.

Martha

You laughed your goddamn head off.

Honey

They're dancing like they danced before.

George

It's a familiar dance, Monkey Nipples. They both know it.

Honey

I don't know what you mean.

Martha

I like the way you move.

Nick

I like the way you move, too.

George

They like the way they move.

Honey

That's nice.

Martha

I bust a gut! [laughs uproariously, then settles] George didn't think it was funny at all.

George

Martha thinks that unless you, as she demurely puts it, "bust a gut", you're not amused, you know. Unless you're… carrying on like a hyena, you're not having any fun.

Martha

What a dump. [pauses] Hey, w-what's that from? "What a dump!"

George

How would I know?

Martha

Oh, come on, what's it from? You know!

George

Martha…

Martha

What's it from, for chrissake?!

George

What's what from?

Martha

I just told you. I just did it. "What a dump!" Huh? What's that from?

George

I haven't the faintest idea.

Martha

Dumbbell.

Martha

Hey!

George

Hark! Forest sounds.

Nick

Hmm?

George

Animal noises.

Martha

Heyyyy!

Nick

Here we are.

Honey

Hip, hop! Hip, hop! Hip, hop! Hip, hop!

Nick

Are you a bunny, Honey?

Honey

Bunny Honey!

George

Well, now, how's the bunny?

Honey

Bunny funny! [giggles]

George

Bunny funny. Good for bunny!

Martha

Come on, George!

George

Honey, funny bunny.
[Honey dissolves into drunken laughter.]

George

I'm very impressed.

Martha

You're damn right!

George

I said I was impressed. I'm beside myself with jealousy. What do you want me to do, throw up?

George

Martha, will you show her where we keep the, uh, euphemism?

George

Martha is 108… years old. She weighs somewhat more than that.

George

Good. Better. Best. Bested.

George

Martha, in my mind, you are buried in cement right up to the neck. No, up to the nose — it's much quieter.

George

Vanish!