I'm celebrating.
Celebrating what?
I think this could be the best show we've ever done.
[on the television]
Very good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Listen. We've got an extraordinary show for you tonight. You're not going to believe it. As a matter of fact, I don't think I do. Would you please give a warm welcome to our own Chancellor Adam Sutler!
["God Save the Queen" plays on the background as an impersonator of Adam Sutler enters]
No way!
It can't be!
We threw out the censor-approved script, and shot a new one I wrote this morning.
Oh, my god.
[Cuts to the audience applaud on being threatened by the fake Sutler's soldiers. Evey chokes on her champagne]
Chancellor, Chancellor, Chancellor. I understand you've been under tremendous strain lately since the beginning of this whole terrorism business, and we thought it would be a nice idea to try and help you relax. Girls?
[Deitrich's girls arrive with a humidor, from where the fake Sutler takes a cigar. Another girl offers him a glass of milk]
Ah! Warm milk. There's nothing better.
I understand you enjoy a glass every night, Chancellor.
Since I was a boy. [The real Sutler is shown sitting in his bunker while watching, holding a glass of milk] But you're wrong, Mr Deitrich. The terrorist was never a serious concern.
[A prankster dressed as V ties the fake Sutler's shoelaces together, whilst replacing his cigar with an exploding one]
It's him!
Chancellor, Chancellor, are you saying that he's not still alive and active?
The terrorist has been neutralised.
[The cigar explodes as the fake Sutler huffs from it.]
Oh, my God, Chancellor, look! The terrorist!
The terrorist! [The camera pans to the fake V among the musicians, scraping a washboard] Get him! [Sutler walks toward the fake V, but having been shoe-laced, stumbles.]
Oh, dear!
[As Boots Randolph's "Yakety Sax" plays, the show plays a sped-up chase of V, the girls, and the soldiers, while the fake Sutler still struggles to get off from being shoe-laced. An actor in a gorilla suit appears randomly and bangs his chest with his fists. Gordon then throws a banana peel, and the fake V slips on it, and is tackled by the fake Sutler's soldiers]
At last! And now, for all the world to see!
[The fake Sutler approaches the fake V, now restrained by the soldiers. He unmasks the fake V, who was revealed to be another Sutler impersonator] [As her mother gasps and shakes her head]
It's him!
Unhand me! I am your chancellor!
[A group of old men, who are watching the show, laugh out loud]
How dare you! I am the chancellor!
[Gordon makes a funny act of confusion, pointing to one fake Sutler after the other]
Imposter! [the two fake Sutlers tackle each other in a farcical fight. Gordon makes a funny act of sympathy before they get back up.] Soldiers! That man is the terrorist!
I order you to shoot that traitor!
Liar!
Faker!
Fraud!
Ready...
Aim...
[together, as Gordon blocks his ears with his fingers in a funny act of fright]
FIRE!
[The soldiers shoot both fake Sutlers. The curtain closes, the entire public is left laughing and as Gordon bows down to the clapping audience, another fake V sneaks in from the cyclorama, snickering as he holds a cigar. The real Sutler shatters the glass of milk in his hand as he watches]
