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Tobias: Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please, Do you wake every morning with shame and despair, to discover your pillow is covered with hair, what ought not to be there, Well Ladies and Gentleman, from now on you can waken at ease, You need never again have a worry or care, I will show you a miracle marvellous rare, Gentleman you are about to see something what rose from the dead... On the top of my head.
Tobias: Twas Pirelli's Miracle Elixir, that's what did the trick Sir, true Sir true, Was it quick Sir, did it in a tick Sir, just like an Elixir ought to do. How 'bout a bottle Mister, only costs a penny guaranteed. Does Pirelli's stimulate the growth Sir, you can have my oath Sir 'tis unique, Rub a minute, stimulating in' it, soon you'll have to thin it once a week.
Mr Todd: Pardon me Ma'am what's that awful stench, Must be standing near an open trench
Mrs Lovett: Are we standing near an open trench, Pardon me Sir whats that awful stench
Tobias: Buy Pirelli's Miracle Elixar, anything whats slick sir, soon sprouts curls, try Pirelli's, when they see how thick Sir, you can have your pick sir of the girls.
Tobias: Wanna buy a bottle Mister
Mr Todd: What is this?
Mrs Lovett: What is this?
Mr Todd: Smells like piss
Mrs Lovett: Smells like...Ugh.
Mr Todd: Looks like piss
Mrs Lovett: Wouldn't touch it if I was you dear
Mr Todd: This is piss, piss with ink
Tobias: Let Pirelli's activate your roots Sir
Mr Todd: Keep it off your boots, Sir, eats right through
Tobias: Yes get Pirelli's, use a bottle of it, Ladies seem to love it
Mrs Lovett: Flies do too.
Mr.Pirelli: I am Adolfo Pirelli the King of the Barbers, the Barber of Kings. E buon giorno, I blow you a kiss. And I..the so famous Pirelli a wish-a to know-a who has-a the nerve-a to say...my elixir is piss, who say's this?


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