ALL A B C D E F G H I J K L M
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

Sidney: This... You film your entire high school experience, and, what, post it on the 'net?
Robbie: Everybody will be doing it some day.
Charlie: It's kind of the one component the killer is missing.
Gale: Wait, what do you mean?
Charlie: Well, if you wanna be the new, new version, the killer should be filming the murders.
Robbie: Yeah, it's like the natural next step in the psycho-slasher innovation. I mean, you film them all real-time, and before you get caught, you upload them into cyberspace.
Charlie: Making your art as immortal as you. [speaking the same time as Robbie] Not to implicate him.
Robbie: [speaking same time as Charlie] Not to implicate me.
Sidney: So, who do you think is doing the murders?
Charlie: Well, it's a Stab fanatic, clearly. Working on less of a Shrequel and more of a Screamake.
Robbie Mercer: Copyright terms, by the way.
Charlie: 'Cause all there are now are remakes. Only horror studios green-light. I mean, there are still rules, but the rules have changed. The unexpected is the new cliche.
Robbie: Yeah, you gotta have an opening sequence that blows the doors off - gallop some music video direction and the kill's gotta be way more extreme.
Charlie: Modern audiences get sappy to the rules of the original. So, the reverse has become the new standard. In fact, the only sure-fire way to survive a modern horror movie, you pretty much gotta be gay.
[pause]
Gale: So, why are you so sure that the killer is working by the rules of a horror remake?
Robbie: Well, the original Stab structure is pretty apparent.
Charlie: Yeah, two kids killed in a house when their parents are away?
Robbie: And, then the school's 'hot chick' savage beyond recognition.
Charlie: We all know where it goes from there...?
Sidney: A party.
Charlie: Exactly. A party. Guaranteed third-act-main-cast bloodbath.
Robbie: Fingers crossed on some nudity for a change...


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