N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

[After hearing ZeppCo's message about Ernie's proposal with them...]
Lars: Betrayed by my own brother.
Ernie: Betrayal? Don't talk to me about betrayal! You should have told me about that offer! Half that factory is mine!
Lars: And half is mi... And half is mine, including the half that you tried to sell!
Ernie: Yeah, and it would have, if it hadn't been for that stinking bus!
Lars: Bus? You can't leave well enough alone, can you? You ruin everything!
Ernie: Me? You blame me for this?
Lars: Well, look! [He points to the big hole caused from the bug bomb] You blew a hole in the floor!
Ernie: Well, I distinctly remember somebody yelling, "Shoot, shoot!"
Lars: Yeah, yell, you've never listened to me before!
Ernie: And you know why?
Lars: Why?
Ernie: Because I have no respect for you! Spending your whole life in that stupid factory! It's tragic.
Lars: You think I didn't have other things I wanted to do with my life? You think I didn't have ambitions of my own?
Ernie: Oh, come on, you love string.
Lars: I didn't love string.
Ernie: Well, you could have fooled me. You and Pop were always huddled together running some piece of something through your fingers. It didn't matter what I did, I didn't even exist! I made him my special rack of lamb for is 70th birthday.
Lars: [sighing in resignation] Oh, no.
Ernie: Yes, you remember! I slaved over that meal, making sure everything was perfect! Did he say, "Thanks, Ernie, it was delicious"? No. He only noticed the string I had tied it with. [He sighs] He was crazy. But I still wanted his approval. I didn't leave, Lars. I was cast out.
Lars: There you go again. Blaming everything else but yourself. You think you're a success. Huh? Well, you... [He points at Ernie] ...can't...cook!
Ernie: I hate you!
Lars: And I hate you!
Ernie: Not as much as I hate you!
Lars: Yeah?!
Ernie: Yeah, double! Double! Oh, give me something! I'm gonna brain you!
Lars: Here it is!
Ernie: Oh, yeah, give it to me! Go ahead!
[In the midst of an argument, Lars throws an orange at Ernie, but the orange hits the mouse instead. Ernie sees the unconscious mouse on the table in shock]
Ernie: You killed him! [He laughs with joy as Lars walks over]
Lars: I didn't even know he was there!
Ernie: Just think of all the trouble we could have saved ourselves if we just threw fruit at him in the first place!
Lars: Look! He's still breathing!
Ernie: Well, kill him, kill him! Find a blunt object! There!
[Lars grabs a small shovel and prepares to finish the mouse]
Lars: There we go, get the...!
Ernie: Let him have it. [Lars hesitates] What the hell are you waiting for?!
Lars: I can't just hit him with a shovel.
Ernie: Why not?
Lars: Well, look at him, he's pathetic.
Ernie: Pathetic? He's Hitler with a tail! This is The Omen with whiskers! Nostradamus didn't see this thing coming!
Lars: Well, Ernie, he's a living thing.
Ernie: Not for long! Give me that! [He snatches the shovel from Lars and prepares to kill the mouse, but hesitates] I can't! [he hits himself in the head with the shovel and starts crying] Look at him just lying there! It just doesn't feel very sportsman-like.
[The mouse starts regaining consciousness]
Lars: We'd better do something quick! I think he's coming to!

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