If Mama Cass Elliot and Karen Carpenter had shared a lunch together, they'd both be alive today.
More from Man of the Year
Tom If you tell a joke and it's not funny, you can put a laugh track over it...but the joke's still not funny.
Tom What do I think of gay marriage? Well, I believe that gays have every right to be just as miserable as the rest of us.
Tom Even in the face of tyranny, there is comedy. Remember the story of those two Jewish commandos who were sent to kill Adolf Hitler at 12:30? They waited for him in an alley with guns, bombs and knives. Only Hitler didn't show up. After half an hour, still no Hitler. Finally, one assassin turns to the other and says, "My God, I hope nothing happened to him."
Man of the Year
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