Horrible Bosses quotes
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Nick: [to the forthwall] The only hitch? I work for this guy, David Harken... who right now is giving me some old shit for killing two people. He's a total ****ing asshole.
Harken: If that's the case, I'm gonna have to fire Mat, our longtime security coordinator.
Nick: Ok, I may have been two minutes late.
Harken: I'm a green belt, mother****er...
Nick: What?
Harken: Yeah. All right?
Nick: Okay.
Harken: Now, I know you've been working your tail off for that promotion.
Harken: But I'm not sure I can even consider...
Harken: ...making you the senior vice president of sales ... if I can't trust you.
Nick: You can trust me.
Harken: Yeah, now you sound like my wife. “You can trust me. Just trust me, honey. Nothing’s happening behind your back. Trust me, trust me, trust me.” Meanwhile, she’s ****ing every guy in the neighborhood.
Kohead: I have no idea why he thought you were so ****ing special.
Kohead: But that doesn't matter now, cause he's in the ground, and I'm your boss, and you know -there's gonna be some changes around here.
Nick: - Can't wait to hear them. [w/ big smile]
Kohead: - First things first. EnviroTech Waste Management.
Kohead: It's costing us a lot of money. [picking his ear w/ hand]
Harken: It's like you don't care about this company at all.
Kohead: No ****ing shit I don't care about this company. This is just an ATM to me. You think when I was a kid I dreamed of running a ****ing chemical company? No. I dreamed of being on a beach with a model serving me tropical drinks. That's what I dreamed of. and that's what's gonna happen...
Nick: Why would I stay after being treated like this?
Harken: Well, because I'd make sure that nobody in the industry would ever hire you again.
Nick: Bullshit.
Harken: No, because they're gonna want my letter of recommendation, right? So I'm perfectly willing to write that you are an insubordinate, dishonest drunk.
Nick: You can't do that. That's not true.
Harken: Let me tell you something, you stupid little runt. I own you. You're my bitch. Don't walk around thinking you have free will because you don't. I can crush you any time I want. So settle in because you are here for the long haul.
Harken: If that's the case, I'm gonna have to fire Mat, our longtime security coordinator.
Nick: Ok, I may have been two minutes late.
Harken: I'm a green belt, mother****er...
Nick: What?
Harken: Yeah. All right?
Nick: Okay.
Harken: Now, I know you've been working your tail off for that promotion.
Harken: But I'm not sure I can even consider...
Harken: ...making you the senior vice president of sales ... if I can't trust you.
Nick: You can trust me.
Harken: Yeah, now you sound like my wife. “You can trust me. Just trust me, honey. Nothing’s happening behind your back. Trust me, trust me, trust me.” Meanwhile, she’s ****ing every guy in the neighborhood.
Kohead: I have no idea why he thought you were so ****ing special.
Kohead: But that doesn't matter now, cause he's in the ground, and I'm your boss, and you know -there's gonna be some changes around here.
Nick: - Can't wait to hear them. [w/ big smile]
Kohead: - First things first. EnviroTech Waste Management.
Kohead: It's costing us a lot of money. [picking his ear w/ hand]
Harken: It's like you don't care about this company at all.
Kohead: No ****ing shit I don't care about this company. This is just an ATM to me. You think when I was a kid I dreamed of running a ****ing chemical company? No. I dreamed of being on a beach with a model serving me tropical drinks. That's what I dreamed of. and that's what's gonna happen...
Nick: Why would I stay after being treated like this?
Harken: Well, because I'd make sure that nobody in the industry would ever hire you again.
Nick: Bullshit.
Harken: No, because they're gonna want my letter of recommendation, right? So I'm perfectly willing to write that you are an insubordinate, dishonest drunk.
Nick: You can't do that. That's not true.
Harken: Let me tell you something, you stupid little runt. I own you. You're my bitch. Don't walk around thinking you have free will because you don't. I can crush you any time I want. So settle in because you are here for the long haul.